I am a person who tends to vastly underestimate the amount of effort involved in things I want to do.
If I like an idea, I will be at least 100% off on my estimate of how hard it will be to do.
Every time.
Case in point: I saw an eagle today. I wanted to take its picture.
1/
If I like an idea, I will be at least 100% off on my estimate of how hard it will be to do.
Every time.
Case in point: I saw an eagle today. I wanted to take its picture.
1/
I mean, how hard can that be?
I have a camera with a very large lens and the eagle was just sitting there.
This would certainly be a quick affair.
The minor rub: the eagle was a freakin’ mile away.
See the yellow arrow?
2/
I have a camera with a very large lens and the eagle was just sitting there.
This would certainly be a quick affair.
The minor rub: the eagle was a freakin’ mile away.
See the yellow arrow?
2/
So, I’m like “No prob. I shall walk down this bank approximately 50
yards and that will somehow reduce the distance between us by approximately one mile. Geometry!”
It… did not.
I ran out of bank and was only this close.
3/
yards and that will somehow reduce the distance between us by approximately one mile. Geometry!”
It… did not.
I ran out of bank and was only this close.
3/
“I know! I’ll just go through the woods and sneak up on it!”
Now, let me explain how ludicrous that entire concept is:
1) One does not “sneak up” on eagles. They call good vision “eagle eyes” for a reason.
2) I am about as stealthy as a rhinoceros.
4/
Now, let me explain how ludicrous that entire concept is:
1) One does not “sneak up” on eagles. They call good vision “eagle eyes” for a reason.
2) I am about as stealthy as a rhinoceros.
4/
3) There was an actual reservoir between us.
To “sneak up” on that eagle, I’d have to hike for about two miles carrying 15 pounds of gear.
But I wanted that picture, so my calculations pegged the difficulty at somewhere between “easy” and “you’d be a fool not to, really”.
5/
To “sneak up” on that eagle, I’d have to hike for about two miles carrying 15 pounds of gear.
But I wanted that picture, so my calculations pegged the difficulty at somewhere between “easy” and “you’d be a fool not to, really”.
5/
And off I went around to the left, across a damn, all the way down to the foot of the reservoir, across a bridge spanning a brook - which was quite lovely - and finally onto the same side as the eagle.
By now, I’m sweating somewhere shy of profusely but well beyond lightly.
6/
By now, I’m sweating somewhere shy of profusely but well beyond lightly.
6/
And then there was the matter of the sneaking up bit.
So, I go tramping down that bank trying to be quiet about it despite shin deep dry leaves.
Note: even deer are loud in dry leaves. I am significantly less light on my feet than a deer.
7/
So, I go tramping down that bank trying to be quiet about it despite shin deep dry leaves.
Note: even deer are loud in dry leaves. I am significantly less light on my feet than a deer.
7/
By my reckoning, I still have a solid quarter-mile to go before I reach where the eagle was, so I’m moving at a deliberate pace with plans to go full rhino-stealth mode shortly…
…and then I see a shadow move across the ground … and I knew before I even looked up.
8/
…and then I see a shadow move across the ground … and I knew before I even looked up.
8/
I had spooked the eagle. It was flying away. Didn’t even get the camera out of its holster before the eagle was behind the trees and…
…gone.
Damnit. It had moved while I was hiking. Was further down the bank. I rousted it.
9/
…gone.
Damnit. It had moved while I was hiking. Was further down the bank. I rousted it.
9/
So, now I’m sweaty, cursing like a trucker, and two miles from the car and I didn’t want to turn around because the path had been rough and rocky and annoying and I just didn’t want to, okay?
That’s my business.
So, I’m like “Might as well just go all the way around.”
10/
That’s my business.
So, I’m like “Might as well just go all the way around.”
10/
Now, that may have been an even more ludicrous idea than trying to sneak up on the eagle in the first place.
This reservoir is pretty vast. I mean… it’s big.
“You’re practically halfway!” I said to myself despite knowing that to be radically false.
11/
This reservoir is pretty vast. I mean… it’s big.
“You’re practically halfway!” I said to myself despite knowing that to be radically false.
11/
So, I get to trudging.
It’s quite pretty. And not small.
You go through the tree stump section, across open meadow, down into woods, up to a visitor center, out onto trail and up onto a dam with sweeping views over a deep valley.
It’s so damn beautiful.
12/
It’s quite pretty. And not small.
You go through the tree stump section, across open meadow, down into woods, up to a visitor center, out onto trail and up onto a dam with sweeping views over a deep valley.
It’s so damn beautiful.
12/
However, now would perhaps be a good time to mention that I have unrepaired torn meniscuses in both knees.
They were very unhappy at this point.
And I had a ways left… that arrow is what I still had left to cover to reach my car.
13/
They were very unhappy at this point.
And I had a ways left… that arrow is what I still had left to cover to reach my car.
13/
So, I keep trudging along through over hill and dale, sweating like I’m in a spin class.
My knees were now irate with me.
All I was thinking was “I think I have some Alleve in the car.”
14/
My knees were now irate with me.
All I was thinking was “I think I have some Alleve in the car.”
14/
And then I finally made it back to the car and promptly rummaged for Alleve like a smoker looking for a cigarette after a flight.
Man, that was less not-difficult-at-all than my initial calculations.
15/
Man, that was less not-difficult-at-all than my initial calculations.
15/
Shoot, I left one part out…
After I spooked the eagle, I thought “Man, that was a big bald eagle… Looked a lot bigger than the one I was looking at from the other side.”
16/
After I spooked the eagle, I thought “Man, that was a big bald eagle… Looked a lot bigger than the one I was looking at from the other side.”
16/
So, after it flew off, I stuck with my original plan just in case… and went into stealth mode right where I had planned…
…and then between those trees, all the way out over the water, I saw something on a branch.
17/
…and then between those trees, all the way out over the water, I saw something on a branch.
17/
It was the eagle I had spotted originally.
The one that flew off was a different one.
And then you know what I did…
18/
The one that flew off was a different one.
And then you know what I did…
18/
I snuck up on that eagle.
Yes. I did.
Like a goddamned boss.
19/
Yes. I did.
Like a goddamned boss.
19/
YEAH, BOYEEEEEEEEE.
I snuck up on a bald eagle from two miles away to get its picture.
I did that.
That is a thing I did.
I would have been a fool not to, really.
//
I did that.
That is a thing I did.
I would have been a fool not to, really.
//
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