Thread by @jiangxiaoyin

A #zhancheng thoughts --

cw: one-sided xicheng, so just scroll pass this if it's not your cup of tea.

-

A broken-hearted Jiang Cheng, without his eye glasses and very drunk, mistook Lan Wangji with Lan Xichen, because they looked so damn alike each other.

It was on the night before Lan Xichen's wedding in an island far south. They were all staying in a hotel, where the ceremony and wedding reception would be held.

Jiang Cheng got really drunk and went to Lan Xichen's room, --

-- on his last desperate attempt to confess his feelings to the older man. He knew he would be rejected (of course! Lan Xichen would marry tomorrow, and definitely not with him!), but, hey, at least Jiang Cheng would feel relieved after that.

It would be easier for him to move on, after he unloaded all of the suffocating feelings he carried on his chest since god knows when.

Except that he messed things up by being too drunk to be able to get to the right floor, and to find the right room too.

It should be room 410 on the 4th floor, not 310 on the 3rd floor.

And that's how he ended up standing (well, technically it was Lan Wangji keeping him from slumping down the front door by holding him straight) face to face with Lan Wangji.

"Xichen," he began. "There's something I have to tell you."

"I'm not my brother," Lan Wangji stated. But of course, Jiang Cheng ignored him.

"I know you will marry tomorrow, but I just have to tell you that Iー"

"Jiang Wanyin, stop."

"No, I won't stop. You have to listen to me. Please. Just this once. I promise, I will never bother you again after this," Jiang Cheng clutched the front side of Lan Wangji's shirt, pleading with tears threatening to fall. And that made Lan Wangji closed his mouth.

Taking the silence as a green light, Jiang Cheng proceeded to continue.

"I have been in love with you since a long time ago. I know you only take me as a little brother. But I always wish we could be more than that... I never stop hoping. But I'm too scared --

-- to make a move on you. Afraid that you'll be disgusted, and that you'll stay away from me."

It was because of the alcohol, that Jiang Cheng became more unguarded and showed his emotion openly. He started to sob.

"When you told me that you finally find --

-- the love of your life, I pretended to be happy, while I was actually broken inside. And when I received your wedding invitation, Iー"

Lan Wangji just couldn't take it anymore. He couldn't bear looking at the sobbing mess in front of him, that was Jiang Cheng, so --

-- he finally took Jiang Cheng in a tight hug; one hand propping his waist, while the other one stroked his hair soothingly.

"It hurts, Xichen. It hurts..." Jiang Cheng's voice and his miserable sob were muffled on Lan Wangji's chest.

"I'm sorry," Lan Wangji could only say. Even if it wasn't his fault, that Jiang Cheng was broken-hearted.

The truth was, it was not only Jiang Cheng who was hurt; Lan Wangji's chest, too, felt like it was stabbed by a sword now.

He always knew that the one that Jiang Cheng loved was his older brother. However, just like how Jiang Cheng couldn't stop himself from loving Lan Xichen, Lan Wangji, too, couldn't stop himself from falling in love with Jiang Cheng...

And now, to see the man that he loved in such a miserable stateーknowing that he was deeply hurt and broken-hearted... Lan Wangji felt even more hurt, because there's nothing he could do to un-break Jiang Cheng's heart.

"I'm sorry," he said again in a whisper, --

-- nuzzling the top of Jiang Cheng's head with his nose.

Jiang Cheng pulled away from Lan Wangji's embrace, and stuttered out, "If... if it's not too much, could I ask for a kiss? One last kiss, and I promise I will stop. Stop loving you. Stop bothering you."

Lan Wangji didn't expect such request from Jiang Cheng, that he reflexively rejected, "Jiang Wanyin, you've got the wrong person. It's me, Wangji, not Xichen-ge."

Jiang Cheng snorted bitterly. "It's fine to reject me if you don't want to. No need to lie to me and pretend --

-- to be someone else like that." His expression turned into a sad pout. "It's fine, really..."

Tears started to stream down Jiang Cheng's eyes again, as he tried to messily wiped it with his hands.

"Thank you for listening to what I have to say. I'm sorry --

-- if I've disturbed you. I'll be going now, then... I hope the wedding ceremony goes well tomorrow..."

Jiang Cheng flashed a sad smile and was about to turn to walk to the elevator, when Lan Wangji pulled him once again into his embrace and captured his lips.

Lan Wangji could sense the body in his embrace stiffened, before then relaxing and reciprocated the kiss.

He knew this was wrongーJiang Cheng was not sober, and thought he was his older brother. But Lan Wangji just couldn't let Jiang Cheng go --

-- when he's still sad and hurt like that.

Even if he had to pretend to be Lan Xichen, it was okay. As long as he could lessened Jiang Cheng's pain.

Lan Wangji's heart shattered, knowing that Jiang Cheng's passionate kiss was actually not meant to be given to him, --

-- but he just couldn't stop. And when Jiang Cheng then pushed him backwards and into his room, Lan Wangji didn't even stop him.

They ended up shared the night in a passionate lovemaking session; two desperate men with their own pain.

Lan Wangji knew so damn well that it was wrong. But he knew, that he would never regret it.

*

The morning after was a disaster.

Jiang Cheng woke up in a panic, thinking that he'd messed up by sleeping with the groom when he was drunk.

And when he found out that it was Lan Wangji he had slept with, he was even more panicked.

How could he mistook him as Lan Xichen?!

Jiang Cheng scolded himself for being the stupidest person. If he knew that it would end up like this, he would not make himself so drunk last night.

"Wangji, I'm sorryー"

"Don't."

Lan Wangji never cut someone's --

-- speech, before. So when he did now, it surprised Jiang Cheng.

"What?"

"Don't be sorry," Lan Wangji repeated, staring at Jiang Cheng with his pair of golden eyes from where he was having some tea on the sofa. "Because I don't regret it."

It was silence, as Jiang Cheng struggled to digest Lan Wangji's words. It didn't help that his head was pounding like crazy because of the hangover.

"What do you mean?" Jiang Cheng finally gave up, massaging his temples with the heel of his hands.

Lan Wangji went to his bedside and handed him a glass of water and an aspirin. Jiang Cheng took it and drank the medicine after murmuring his thanks.

Lan Wangji waited until Jiang Cheng put his glass down on the bedside table before spoke up again.

"I will be responsible for what has happened last night."

"Wait," Jiang Cheng furrowed his brows, staring at Lan Wangji in confusion. "If anything, I'm the one who should be responsible, because as drunk as I might be, I still remember that I was the --

-- one who initiatedー" he stopped, blushing from the embarrassing memory.

Lan Wangji gave him a nod. "But I was the sober one last night. I could have prevented it from happening. I could've refused."

"Then why didn't you stop me?"

Lan Wangji didn't answer, just staring at Jiang Cheng with his calm expression. But the redness blooming at the tip of his ears gave him away, and realization hit Jiang Cheng hard.

/He didn't stop Jiang Cheng because he wanted it./

Lan Wangji? Towards Jiang Cheng, he...?

Jiang Cheng felt his cheeks were so hot, as it became as red as Lan Wangji's ears. And without another word, he climbed down Lan Wangji's bed and got dressed.

When Jiang Cheng was about to open the door to go back to his own room, --

-- Lan Wangji called for him.

"Would you like to give it a try?" He asked. His usual flat tone was now full of hope in Jiang Cheng's ear. "To be with me."

Jiang Cheng blushed again, and after a while, he spoke up, "I'll consider it."

Lan Wangji flashed him his rare smile. "Mn."

*

The rest of the day went in a flash. The wedding ceremony went well, and they're currently nearing the end of the wedding reception.

Jiang Cheng was dragged forward by his friends to join --

-- the toss-the-bouquet game, and by luck, he's the one who caught the bride's bouquet.

Lan Wangji approached him after the reception over, and they walked side by side to the elevator to go back to their rooms.

"Congratulation," he said.

Jiang Cheng lifted his brows. "What for?"

Lan Wangji gestured towards the bouquet with his eyes. "You're next."

Jiang Cheng snorted. "You really believe that whoever caught the bouquet will be the next one to marry?"

Lan Wangji just shrugged. "I don't know. Do you?"

Jiang Cheng hummed, pretending to think hard. "Well, I actually don't," he said. "But whether I will really be the next one to marry or not, it will depend on my boyfriend..."

Jiang Cheng offered the bouquet to Lan Wangji, who halted his steps to stare --

at Jiang Cheng with wide eyes.

"You..."

Jiang Cheng bit his lower lip and nodded.

Lan Wangji slowly took the bouquet from Jiang Cheng's hand, and dragged him into an embrace. A smile on his face.

"Then I'll make sure the myth comes true for us."

*