Thread by @johnniejae

I knew this Christmas was going to be rough and not very festive, it's the 1st Christmas without my mom, I can't be home with family because Covid & severe lack of money. There's no tree, no gifts and a sinking feeling that we won't be able to pay rent.

It's not just the fear of not paying rent, it's the pressure of being the only one with income and knowing this struggle is because I am immunocompromised and my partner not being able to work cuz of the risk of me getting COVID. It's getting to me.

We're falling behind and things are getting more expensive. I am working my ass off but it's not enough and the biggest expense we have is me. My meds, my copays and medical expenses. It's getting to me and even my optimism is waning cuz I the world can't get its shit together

I don't know how much longer we can keep afloat in this pandemic much less keep me safe.

I knew it was going to be a rough Christmas just not this rough

All my love to those in my shoes, mourning, isolated and trying to handle this crushing uncertainty with grace.