Thread by @ooana

Welcome. Great and noble Covidians. Its reminded that our faith must not be tempted by the sullying threat of mockery or by the scourge that is humor, blasphemy or questioning of The Doctrine. A’rona!
(A’rona with you)

Believers. We do not gather today to renew our commitment and allegiance as Covidians.

This gospel is brought to you by your local corona authority so you are in a safe space. Praise be to Fauci the worthy, Wen the wise and Harris the just. Please bless us and keep us.

Covidians let the power of the booster flow through you and please open to 12:26 the book Pharmaceuticals, song of Pfizer.

With raised arm and secured mask we gather this day, the year of our democratically elected leader Biden the compassionate, to remember these events and renew our commitment to our shared zero goal. We bring unity and clarity after and before the days of darkness.

Let us rise, masked head held high and reprise the sermon celebrating the Holy Jab. Praise be to the Moderna, The Pfizer and now of course our most beloved Merck for the newest blessings by The Science and as confirmed by the Trusted Sources, the Pfizermectin.

Blessed are Those who in their divine goodness have taken it, and not succumbed to the siren song of Horse Paste. They take into their bodies and have proven Their worth by the wisdom of the Lancet. Peer to peer we review with the worthy and say A’rona!
(A’rona with you)

Let your hearts be full and voices joyous on this day, Devoted! For thee are the Responsible and the Good. As the word of those whose worthy words you’ve worded you are indeed alive and your bounty grows still as you build back better.

Fauci willing.

You have honored your promise to always think of others and always allow black and brown bodies, and the marginalized who arise from their liberation to be granted the greatest choice; as enshrined by the Prophet notorious RBG (rest in power)

We raise our fists like the stunning and brave who gather to assure bodies can always be free from pregnancy and liberated from the disease that threatens equity.

Thriving by striving to submit with humility you know the joy of accomplishing opportunity. We pray that the great reserves will again open and make our lives plentiful. A’Rona!
(A’Rona with you)

Yes. It is our great and loving A’Rona that showed the us Great New Economic path and the United Front that will hasten our arrival to Saint Schwab’s Promise of the Great Reset.

Experts be our mothers. Expertise guide our fathers. And may we never falter to shun those who deny the truth of The Science and attempt to destroy what we Build Back Better! Fauci willing.

The truth is ours, and misinformation must be silenced for only by the CDC can you reenter the kingdom of normalcy. Only by WHO can you be free to be with other people, the words as is written in the Right Side of History are there for all who educate themselves.

Hochul has risen to Shepard the poor and we are her grateful apostles. A’Rona!
(A’Rona with you.)

The feminine shows us that the privilege of life and cure for the toxicity of masculinity is the blessing of the needle. May all folks live to see one thousand boosters and die with the knowledge that to die on stolen land weighs heavy in hearts.

Hold space eternal as we do all emotional labor for our sins. Climate change be merciful.

We say onto your preferred pronoun, only by the blessings of vaccination can we live on and liberate others from disease and death. A’rona!

(A’rona with you)

Know it was your divine safety that guided you to Him, the one true leader, Biden the Compassionate. By it and through him you follow the one true Way thereby cleansing the earth of those who endanger our democracy.

We renew our commitment to shun the deceivers and their enablers. ‘Let the children come to me. Do not stop them’. We pray they may know your presence or pay the consequences.

Yours is the proven path fortified by statistics, freeing us from all wrong doing and death. Your way is the way of evidence, of truth, of goodness, diversity and of settled science. And we say A’rona! A’rona A’rona.
(A’rona with you)

(Please assure your masks have not slipped and apply the anointed sanitizer blessed with light and love by the inmates abolishing all prisons provided before returning to your pod.)

-Church of Quarantology, Cult of the Variant, Branch Covidians and the Faucilogical Temple and newly enshrined Wen Chapel and Youth Hostile all contributed to this sermon.

We are committed to diversity and acknowledge we are on stolen land.

@threadreaderapp unroll please