Elie Mystal Profile picture
Feb 28 5 tweets 4 min read
Hello friends. You might know me as "Guy with *super timely* book destroying bad faith conservative law arguments in plain English."

But, thanks to [checks notes] land war in Europe, the *best* way to see me will be the following, open to the public, virtual events:
On Tuesday at 6:00 I will be at the @cwclub talking with @ProfMMurray.

Professor Murray is a professor *of law* so I assume this will be the event where I most directly challenge @FedSoc to a dance fight.

commonwealthclub.org/events/2022-03…
On Wednesday at 8:00, I will be doing @PoliticsProse with @MalcolmNance

About my book, not the global geopolitical situation. Tho... having done after events with Nance before... let's just say where our convos start aren't always where they end up.

politics-prose.com/event/book/pp-…
On Thursday at 7:00 I will be at @HarvardBooks. Virtually of course, because I still owe various people in Cambridge money. With my @thenation colleague @joanwalsh.

Joan and I are both out of things to give, and are a bad influence on each other. :)

harvard.com/event/virtual_…
All of these events are open to the public, so please do sign up if you're interested. And, you know, buy my book. And use it to beat Republicans* over the head.

(*with words)

amazon.com/Allow-Me-Retor…

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More from @ElieNYC

Mar 2
Gov Kim Reynolds (Republican) says that Biden is sending us back in time to the 80s... WHICH IF I RECALL WAS WHEN RONALD REAGAN WAS PRESIDENT.

Is Kim Reynolds against the Reagan Era?
Kim Reynolds is worried about [checks notes] SHOPLIFTERS "roaming free."

Wha...what does she think happens to shoplifters? Does she think they get the death penalty?
Kim Reynolds: "So many children will never catch up"

Umm... WHY??? WHY CAN'T WE INVEST IN CHILDREN WHO HAVE BEEN NEGATIVELY AFFECTED BY COVID RESTRICTIONS AND MAKE SURE THEY "CATCH UP" BY THE TIME THEY'RE IN HIGH SCHOOL?
Read 4 tweets
Feb 25
Friends, read this. @emarvelous interviewed Judge Jackson's college roommates, who *all* applied to @Harvard_Law together, got in, and remained life long friends. This is a fantastic story:

19thnews.org/2022/02/ketanj…
Here's a really nice quote to tease the rest: “Ketanji was the first to say, ‘I’m not just grateful to be here, I deserve to be here, and I’m going to take up space in this ivory tower,’” Simmons said.
Sorry, I'm reading this story and thinking "My college boys better have my back like this or I swear I'll kill them"
Read 4 tweets
Feb 18
This judge done cried? She cried? Where at the "GIVING WHITE WOMEN A SLAP ON THE WRIST FOR MURDER MAKES ME CRY" stage of the proceedings? I just... wow. WOW. This judge cried. Cried y'all. Cried.
I can't... I can't believe this. I'm functionally speechless.
Imagine hating black people so much that you ask black parents to have sympathy with the white person who murdered their son while sentencing her to significantly less time than the guidelines suggest.
Read 6 tweets
Feb 18
I have to do something terrifying today: I am the mystery guest for my 6yo's 1st grade class. You're kind of supposed to share something about your job or family.

So I'm going to do some critical media training with the kids.
I'll have the kids pick the who what when where why and then we'll tell a story where the protag is the hero. THEN, same facts, we'll tell a story where the protag is the villain. Kids can see how changing the tone and adjectives can change our whole sense of the truth.
Lesson: Consider the source. I've done this before for 1st graders. Kids more or less had a good time.

But I also know that it'll be like 10 minutes of me talking and 5 minutes of "can I touch your hair." Which of course I let them. Because SIX YEARS OLD is when that's okay.
Read 4 tweets
Feb 17
Okay... who am I supposed to read to explain freaking Canada to me so I can appear educated and informed about the world
No. I'm not looking to learn about Canada generally. Like... I don't... care?? Exactly.

Just want to understand the current trucker thingy. Cause there's no @SouthPark episode on it yet I don't think.
Me: Why are rural whites even in Canada so susceptible to this right wing graft?
[Sees Pat King's theories on race]
Me: Oh, yeah. Never that far below the surface is it.
Read 4 tweets
Feb 16
Wife and I watched No Time To Die last night and agreed that it's the worst Bond since the Dalton era and that's maybe being unfair to Dalton.

I mean by the point they were all "you can be 007" I was literally shouting "NOBODY CARES" at my television.
[as they put the final plans into motion]
Wife: The science doesn't add...
Me: WHAT SCIENCE??? There are MAGIC SYSTEMS more grounded in reality than this!
And I just REFUSE to accept the universe where allegedly bad ass Black lady 007
A: Kills the unarmed scientist for some racial insensitivity as opposed to his LITERAL GENOCIDE PLOT
B: Gets on the boat WITH THE WOMEN AND CHILDREN instead of finishing the mission
Read 4 tweets

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