Max (#notMyCat) has very much missed his sofa jumper, and is doing his best to ignore the yowling behind him, which is a serious concession on his part.
Max has clearly had a long day and is 100% prepared to tolerate Napoleon's presence here if he will shut up for a bit and let Max jumper snooze.
Problem is Napoleon isn't very good at shutting up.
It's his dinner time though so gonna feed him upstairs away from Max.
Max is in full on "I'm too old for this shit" mode rn.
And Napoleon is full teenager.
"I just want to snooooze. Why you gotta be yowling."
I've persuaded Napoleon to join me upstairs for scritches and duvet snuggles, and to let Max have some quiet time on his jumper.
We are now snoozing, but have made it VERY clear that I'm not allowed to move my hand or leave the room.
So I think I might be stuck here until Becks gets back.
The important thing is right now there are two kitties snoozing in this house in full knowledge of the other one's presence.
That's a HUGE step forward.
I know this because I can just about see Max on cat cam.
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BOJO: Over by the JCB?
PHOTOGRAPHER: Yes please
BOJO: Like this? I can... oh for... COLUMBO! I can see you. Come out.
COLUMBO: Don't mind me, sir
BOJO: Columbo, I spoke to your Chief. No more fines until May!
COLUMBO: Yes sir
BOJO:
COLUMBO: Didn't say I couldn't investigate, sir.
COLUMBO: I get the feeling we've gotten off on the wrong foot, Mr Johnson. That's my fault and I do apologise.
BOJO: It's fine, leftenant, but you have to understand I'm a very busy man.
COLUMBO: Oh I know sir, with the country and the books. My wife, Mrs Columbo, HUGE fan, sir.
BOJO: Is she?
COLUMBO: Oh yes. Mrs Columbo? Loves your novels Mr Johnson. She buys them all.
BOJO: History books, Columbo.
COLUMBO: Sorry sir?
BOJO: I write history books, leftenant. Not novels.
BOJO: We offer visas, ask for nothing, and I claim success?
AIDE: Yes
BOJO: Good so-
<loud crash>
COLUMBO: Sorry sir! That was me. Why this jet really is something
BOJO: Leftenant, how did you get on this plane?!
COLUMBO: I just have a few more questions sir
BOJO: Leftenant, you didn't answer my question. Who let you on the plane?
COLUMBO: Oh an aide did sir.
BOJO: Did they? I'll need to talk to them.
COLUMBO: Anyway, about my question sir.
BOJO: Is it about the parties, leftenant? I've already explained all that
COLUMBO: Oh I know sir. You said that they weren't parties.
BOJO: Exactly
COLUMBO: I wrote it down here somewhere, let me find it...
BOJO: Leftenant, this is a very important trade trip. I'm rather busy.
COLUMBO: I know sir. I won't keep you a minute. I have it here somewhere.
Tom Hanks stars as a legendary fantasy author. When a streaming platform offers to buy his latest hit for millions, he has one problem: It was ghost written by a fanfic author, and she wants her fair share of the money or she's telling the world...
If someone Ko-Fi's me £1000 I will write you a whole Columbo script where he's the police officer investigating Boris Johnson for Partygate.
BOJO: And you are?
COLUMBO: Colombo, sir. I'm here about the parties.
BOJO: There were no parties, Lieutenant
COLUMBO: So you said, sir...
BOJO: I'm a very busy man, Lieutenant.
COLUMBO: Oh I get that sir. I'll just ask a few questions. It's mostly a formality.
BOJO: Good. Well as I told your chief, there were no parties. Just some work drinks.
COLUMBO: Work drinks sir?
BOJO: Work drinks.
COLUMBO: With cake?
BOJO: Yes. With cake.
COLUMBO: Oh I see sir. Work drinks with cake.
BOJO: You look troubled, Lieutenant.
COLUMBO: Oh no, sir. Did I? I didn't mean to? It's just-
BOJO: Ask away
COLUMBO: Well cake is just something I don't get a lot at work.
BOJO: Happens all the time, Lieutenant.