I relate differently because my life experiences have created a necessity for GENUINE reciprocity, consistency, respect, kindness, care, effort, and transparency.
I will NEVER be afraid to walk from anyone OR anything that requires me betray myself to be connected them.
I allowed myself to be in relationships (romantic, platonic, familial, business, etc.) where my value or impact was not considered; my wellbeing was compromised; and I was made to feel like I was hard to love.
In reality: people are LAZY. people are users. people lack integrity. people are inconsiderate. people are only concerned with what they can gain and not with what they can give.
People tend remark on how EASY it is for me give up on someone or something but the truth is: I've just embraced that fact that you cannot give people more of what they already don't appreciate in hopes that they stop taking you for granted.
"Fantasy is what people want; Reality is what they need." @MsLaurynHill
I am worthy of relationships where people show up for me; are genuine with me and toward me; and treat me with kindness, respect, and love-- especially when that is what I've shown them.
I can love you & NEVER speak to you again. I could miss you & leave those memories in the past, indefinitely. I could wish you well; pray for your safety and sanity; and send you love + light for the rest of your days without putting myself in a positon to harmed by you again.
You cannot build a home OR make a home OR feel at home with someone who has not created a home within themselves. #carreisms
Yall ever experienced #heartbreak and then was like, " i WILL neVEr lEt AnyONe bREaK MY hEArT aGAin"...
Then life hits you with "HOLD MY FUCKING BEER..."
I must've never LOVED, been loved, or felt so connected to another human being like this... EVER.
This is the part where Im supposed to say:
"Men are dogs."
"ALL men are this or that."
"I AM NEVER OPENING UP AGAIN."
"FBGM!!!"
"I CAN'T TRUST ANOTHER MAN AS LONG AS HE HAS A PULSE."
Yall keep asking ME why I'm NOT spending #xmas with my father, I WASN'T INVITED.
I don't believe in going places where I'm NOT invited, celebrated, embraced, empowered,or appreciated.
So,yeah. there ya go. Yall could practice NOT being in spaces that dont want yall there too.
Stop FORCING yallself in folks life then being MAD cause they not responding or reacting positively. #ThinkAboutIt:
The more time you spend with people who don't fuck with you, the more time you miss out on spending time with people who DO fuck with you.
Oh and for the folks who said "spend the holiday with your mother (and "reconcile"🙄)", bro we AIN'T spoke since my Grandmother's Funeral in 2016.
Shordy NOT tryna fa-la-la-la-la with ME.🎅🏿
And I'm NOT knowingly expecting for her to be someone she has NEVER been, TF. 🤷🏿♀️
I been back home, like in #GaryIndiana, for like 8 calendars and people STILL think I'm gone.
I guess I stay out the way too good.
I mind my business too well.
I stay in my lane too good.
I focus on my focus too well.
I only prioritize my priorities.
All that other SHIT is beyond me.
It's MY energy + I aint wasting on shit that AINT productive, inspiring, or meaningful.
I need a good CRY but sis, these tears not coming out.😭
I need to write, maybe some poetry, quotes, or short free form, etc..📖
I just wanna be loved on-- mentally, emotionally, spiritually, financially, intellectually, and physically.👽
These last 6-12 months have been a whole fucking lot BUT I BEEN SHOWING UP, DOING THE WORK, AND REMAINING OPEN.
But I'M TIRED, BOSS.🥴
I just don't feel the need to pretend that real life shit aint happening; that I'm not really out here having a complex human experience; or that I'm not responsible for me + my life. it's heavy tho. 🤷🏿♀️