emi 🦊✨🎇 Profile picture
May 7, 2022 4 tweets 1 min read Read on X
#WarprizeJiSeason YLLZ is sick of WRH and wants to just help end him, but the sects insist that he ask for SOMETHING bc they fear he'll say they owe him otherwise.

Fed up, YLLZ randomly snatches a bunny from the CR at the end of the meeting, declares it his prize, and leaves.
As he is thrown into a basket and carried off as a warprize, Bunji, who was injured during the last skirmish and hasn't been able to shift back into his human form, is now greatly regreting hanging around the meeting hall to learn what the Big Bad YLLZ had to say.
Also LXC tries to convince that the YLLZ didnt ACTUALLY take LWJ as his warprize and would probably be willing to give him back in exchange for an actual rabbit. He fails.
Yes, by the time YLLZ has found out his prize bunny (which he was going to stew) is a cultivator and has nursed LWJ during the rest of his injury-healing days, LWJ is already smugly and with great horniness playing up the I was snatched by you as your warprize angle.

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More from @enigmatree

Dec 30, 2023
AU where WWX was never a Jiang disciple and died as the Yiling Laozu, disgusted with all those awful evil cultivators-- except for LWJ, the man who held his hand as he died and promised to hide away A-Yuan, the only survivor of the Wens.

Then he woke up again, in MXY's body.
On the day WWX died, HGJ was the first to get past the highest defences atop the Burial Mounds during the siege against YLLZ. WWX had been trying to destroy the Stygian Tiger Seal when the cultivators had attacked, and the moment of distraction costed him everything.
When he turned his eyes towards where the Wens were being killed by the invading cultivators, the Stygian Tiger Seal immediately turned back on him. He was neither able to stop the seal from killing him nor able to stop destroying the seal to try and save the Wens.
Read 40 tweets
Dec 23, 2023
someone write me a historical au where LWJ is a physician going from the imperial capital back to gusu and on the mountain road his carriage is robbed by bandits and the bandit group kidnaps him. He gets taken away to their hideout, mouth gagged and hands tied.
It's deep winter so LWJ's bundled up in furs, and only some of his face is properly visible. The bandits are incredibly hurried, arguing and rushing as they pull the struggling LWJ through their walled-off stronghold. LWJ's servants get locked away while he's brought deeper.
"Mmmh!" LWJ growls out.

The older man amongst the bandits, the leader of this group of dozen, looks at LWJ. "I'm really sorry, guniang," He says, "We have no other choice. Don't blame boss for this."

"What if it doesn't work, Uncle Four?" One of the men asks, almost teary-eyed.
Read 44 tweets
Nov 23, 2023
soulmate au where you dream future visions of all the biggest death risks your soulmate will go through so you can protect them better. Cloud Recesses Wangxian %1000 do not even have the faintest thought that the men they see in their dreams might be one another.
LWJ is angry scared and confused by his soulmate, who in his visions seems to be an evil demon suffering in hell. How is a normal, let alone good or just, human being supposed to ever fall into such straits?

The idea that that might be bright and cheerful WWX?? Impossible.
Meanwhile, WWX does in fact know that his soulmate is a Lan man, so he looks around the Cloud Recesses with some more interest-- searching for a radical and determined rule breaker!

LWJ, dutiful disciplinarian, getting whipped to death for criminal acts by his sect? No way!
Read 136 tweets
Feb 6, 2023
Fav WWX's parents live headcanon is young LWJ dealing with his hate and attraction towards WWX by actively comparing him to Wei Changze, who looks like a DILF WWX and is kind and polite and respectful to everyone-- and ending up with a huge and embarassing baby crush on WCZ.
WWX all day every day every moment: LAN ZHAN LAN ER GONGZI LAN ER GEGE LAN WANGJI LAN ZHAN LAN ZHAN LAN--

LWJ: 😠 HMPH.

WCZ, just once: Good morning Lan er gongzi.

LWJ: 🥺 Good morning Senior Wei ❤️
I imagine WWX hates it lmao. WHAT DOES HIS DAD HAVE THAT HE DOESNT! They look almost exactly the same, EXCEPT WWX INHERITED HIS MOM'S SILVER EYES AND IS MORE HANDSOME THERE HE SAID IT.

Cangse Sanren: Allow me to disagree on that kiddo

WCZ: No no I think he's got a point
Read 41 tweets
Jan 28, 2023
Wangxian transmigration superhero au where the terrible supervillain YLLZ is killed by the hero HGJ, his archenemy. As HGJ's sword of shining light goes through his chest, he laughs, coughs out a mouthful of blood, and whispers viciously; "Let's be enemies in our next life too."
The sword is wrenched back out of his body.

Around them, in the ruins of the Old City, the army of heroes who had gathered to destroy YLLZ start cheering loudly.

Looking at him from above with those harsh eyes, HGJ doesn't even deign to reply.

WWX slumps down to his knees.
The Wens he was protecting are all dead, annihilated by the widerange elemental powers of the Jin Guild heroes. HGJ, insufferable beacon of justice that he is, likely was never even told about them.

The cheers grow tinny and muffled, and WWX collapses onto the broken ground.
Read 130 tweets
Jan 13, 2023
Now you've made me think... College student Lan Wangji with his new dating profile which includes one (1) nude photo that he forgot he posted, getting his first message from a rich eccentric (obv WWX) asking to pay thousands for LWJ's nudes to print and frame in his penthouse.
Why does he have a nude in his dating profile? Bc he blacked out after his bestfriend Mianmian convinced him to drink for the first time ever, and they both got drunk as hell and LWJ's a romantic so MM (drunk) decided to make him a dating profile to finally find him a date.
MM (drunk) had the genius idea that a Tasteful Nude (tm) would be the perfect finish to the selection of her godly handsome best friend's photos that any random black-and-white cigarette smoking or shirtless fish-holding guy could see. LWJ (drunk) found this extremely reasonable.
Read 36 tweets

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