Robin Profile picture
May 10 17 tweets 4 min read
So, as Ford's not complying w/ a court order to release mandate letters, I am helping Ontario's ministers by publishing a simplified version of what I assume, from their actions, are their mandates. (They'll be easier for them to read anyway.) #onpoli #FordFailedOntario
1/
Education: Make teachers’ lives a living hell. Be vague re masking, refuse to reduce class size, dither re online/hybrid teaching, block $$ for infrastructure, & withhold free tests. The more resignations the better. On the bright side, you can be very nice to private schools
2/
Health: One word: privatization. Release ON from its burden of supporting people’s health. Confused directives, reduced wages, understaffing, underfunding are all good. The feds’ll kick in the $$. We’ll build a few hospitals & sell them to our friends later. Just don’t tell
3/
LTC: Tho people seem to care for the deadwood they’ve stuck in LTC, our goal is to privatize, and we have friends lined up to buy, so focus on profit. Keep families out if possible - they get over-protective. Pay staff peanuts. Avoid FT positions - no benefits! Iron Ring, baby
4/
Finance: Starve the beast. Cut revenue & bury federal monies while leaving me (your premier) as much re-election $$ as possible in a slush fund to bribe invest in the election. You will have to do an election budget, but don't worry, it’ll never happen. And, oh yeah, privatize
5/
OMAFRA: We’re going to pave over most of what you’d be working on anyway, so if you want to follow Rod’s vacation itinerary, it’s ok. There may be a meeting or two to talk about how much we love farmers, and we’ll line up lots of media for that. Lucky we own most reporters
6/
Transportation: We need a distraction from the fact that we’ve siphoned all the infrastructure money away from road repair, so you’ll build a new road or two. Place them so the activists get all upset and miss what we’re doing with MZOs and wetlands. Should be fun!
7/
Housing: Our developer buddies have this covered. Just say ‘yes’. You’ll only have to zone as they request and keep Toronto from trying to grab all your budget. Our voters hate Toronto anyway. NO subsidized housing, ok? MZOs will help with the zoning
8/
Colleges & Universities: the more of them that go bankrupt, the more of their land we can funnel to our developer friends and funders. Laurentian was perfect! Squeeze them hard, the condescending know-it-alls. And - privatize.
9/
Labour, Training, & Skills: you will get to announce all kinds of wonderful programs, and your staff will get to find ways to make sure that nobody is actually eligible for any of them. Don’t fret about union hostility – leave them be and they’ll mess up on their own
10/
Attorney General: Starve legal aid. Talk about gangs and guns but otherwise keep your head down – you don’t know much about Canadian law, so just let that name recognition thing keep you going.
11/
Solicitor General: Fight crime, especially all those Wynne/Liberal initiatives. Is Toronto a crime? Keep up the good work of jamming our police forces with alt-right nutjobs to crack the heads of delinquent kids & the homeless. And – can we win ONE of our court cases? Please?
12/
Children, Community, & Social Services: This is a reduce/reuse/recycle portfolio – reduce spending, reuse and redeploy promised monies, recycle campaign slogans. Kids can’t vote anyway, and the rest are likely to vote NDP or some damn thing
13/
Energy: Strip all former ‘green’ initiatives and incentives and pull out electric car chargers and windmills. Then we’ll announce an electric car initiative just before the election and fool all these forgetful yobs into voting for us
14/
Seniors & Accessibility: Whatever. They’ll just forget, or maybe die before the election. And anyway the feds will come in with some bleeding heart $$ and save us the time and energy. Privatize!
15/end

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