Thread by @nxxdio

#出勝 #dkbk

It's a strange morning when your kids guards your husband from you and blames you for hurting him. Izuku didn't even know where they got that idea from, but he soon finds out.

"Dad makes Papa cry and scream at night!" Their daughter says, kicking Izuku's shins.

Their son nods, glued to Kacchan's pants. "Daddy bad." He mutters.

"Stop hurting Papa or- or we call Auntie!"

Kacchan and Izuku looked at each other, clearly remembering what happened last night. The evidence was clear on Kacchan's neck and Izuku's back.

Izuku wants to crawl into a ditch and his daughter would glad do the job for him. Kacchan looks like he's about to burst into hysterical cackling.

"Honey, it's not what it looks like-"

"That's what guilty people say!"

Yes, daddy is guilty, but not in the way that you think.

Izuku, because he's a good parent, does not add oil to the fire of their daughter.

Kacchan, because he likes to make his life hard, pulls their son into a hug, shoulder shaking with mirth.

Their daughter glares and their son, comforting his papa, looks at him accusingly.

"No, no, honey, my sunshines, you see your papa and I, we uh... um... it's a grown up thing- Kacchan stop laughing, you're not helping!"

Their daughter let out a war cry and bends her knees. "Attack!!" She shoots towards his gut, knocking him down.

Kacchan lost it. He falls to the floor, wheezing as his face goes red at how hard he was laughing.

"Papa!"

"Pearish, villian!!"

This is how Izuki dies. Death by embarrassment and a million tiny punches from his daughter. He wants on his tombstone that it is Kacchan's fault for not backing him up.

Although, it looks like Kacchan will join him to the grave via laughter.

It takes Izuku two days to fall back into his children's good grace. When he explains that he and papa were doing couple things like kissing, his daughter and son both scrunches up their nose in equal disgust.

--------

"You know, this wouldn't have happened if you weren't so loud." Izuku comes to the conclusion in the middle of the night.

Kacchan snorts. "Like you're not as loud, grunting and growling in my ear like a wild animal."

Izuku pouts because he's pretty sure Kacchan is very vocal once he gets into it.

"But Kacchan, you're a screamer."

Izuku expects Kacchan to deny it, but he gives him a look, a challenge in his eyes.

"What? Can't keep me quiet, Deku?"

Izuku eyes narrow.

He rolls over until he's above Kacchan, his arms boxing him in. "Don't bite off more than you can chew, Kacchan."

Kacchan shivers, grinning widely.

------

The next morning, their son whispers loudly to Kacchan, "Papa, blink four times if you need help, 'kay? Nee-chan and I will rescue you."

[End]