Thread by @LucyInTheSky22

I've been sending a lot of similar feedback on travel copy recently, so I thought I'd openly share my top five most common, always-applicable, Mamma-Mia-here-we-go-again tips for strong features writing

#travelwriting #traveljournalists

Short sentences, & make them ‘work hard’. Recommending or describing something? A) Make it crystal clear what it is/help the reader visualise it, & B) Make it super tempting (if you can, adding a tip element). Avoid waffle, ‘probablys’, ‘possiblys’, ‘arguablys’. Trim. The. Fat.

‘Show, don’t tell’. Don’t tell me a restaurant ‘offers a menu of upmarket regional dishes’. Tell me some of those dishes! Describe the presentation/décor, namecheck the charming barman or the standout dish you had. See also galleries that ‘showcase a range of contemporary art’😴

Avoid reaching for the nearest adjective. Skies are often clear blue, bays golden/sandy, markets bustling. Instead: what did you specifically feel about this place? Did it remind you of something from childhood or pop culture? What was the standout moment?Why did it make the cut?

Don’t just say ‘this thing is here’, with no passion behind its inclusion. In city guides, everything should be a heartfelt recommendation - head here to do *this*, swing by to eat *that*. Related: don’t stuff in too many things per entry - it stops feeling expertly curated.

After your first draft, actively go back and loosen up your language. 1st drafts always come to me v stiff & formal (perhaps bc of info fed in by marketing, hotels, tourist boards). If it’s a consumer publication, you almost can’t be too informal ...

... wake people up by addressing the reader directly, using chatty language and visual descriptions. No ‘offerings’, ‘dining concepts’ or’ ‘well appointed’ anything.

I know that's five, but a bonus one for the trip/pitch planning stage:
Always think: What do real, non-travel-industry people want to do on holiday? What do your friends, partner, Auntie Sue look forward to?
In many cases, it’s not what the tourist board thinks they do.