Thread by @ATMwithJacy

🧵🧵🧵🚩🚩🚩🚩 RED FLAGS YOU SHOULD NOT IGNORE 🧵🧵🧵

🚩: THEY MAKE YOU PROVE YOURSELVES TO THEM.

You are not responsible for their distrust in the people they SEEK OUT to date. If someone did them dirty in the past after they were good to them & now they don’t want to do things for you that you DESERVE because in their head you have to prove you’re WORTHY— RUN!

✅: They come to you knowing your worth and set their intentions early. They respect you and treat you the way you deserve to be treated.

🚩: They try to control where you can/cannot go, who your friends are, what you wear, who you spend time with.

✅: you trust one another. Healthy relationships are built on trust. Trustworthy partners are predictable, faithful and reliable.

🚩: they threaten to harm themselves or do something drastic if the relationship ends or u try to leave them.

🚩: they gaslight you/ call you manipulative after you attempt to set boundaries. They make you feel like you’re crazy for feeling how you feel about something they did that hurt you.

✅: You respect one another. You understand you’re both unique people with your own feelings and thoughts. You respect and accept your differences.

🚩: THEY KEEP TABS ON YOU VIA SOCIAL MEDIA!! They constantly message the other person and expect and demand quick responses.

✅: healthy couples trust each other in each others absence.

🚩: they attempt to intimidate you. They do things that make you feel timid, doubtful, confused or fearful.

✅: you feel supported & cared for! You support each others’ goals. You make decisions together. Your friends and family support your relationship.

THINGS YOU MIGHT FEEL IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP 👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽

🚩“My partner isn’t violent ALL THE TIME. They love me”. They may act lovingly towards you sometimes to use it as an excuse for their abusive behavior. There’s a high chance their violent abusive behavior will continue.

🚩“Things will get better — they didn’t mean to hurt me.” It’s common to minimize what happened with excuses, apologies or promises to change. However, it’s very difficult to get rid of abuse in relationships without professional help.

🚩 “It’s so confusing, I’m not sure what’s going to happen next.” Abusers often try to influence your sense of what’s real and this is GASLIGHTING. They make you feel like you’re going crazy.

🚩 “Maybe it’s my fault.” You’re never the blame for someone else’s abusive behavior. No matter what you do/have done.

🚩 “I’m scared of what will happen if I leave them.” You might feel you’re not capable of making it on your own. I promise you are. It’s important to remember you have people that will be there with you every step of the way. Find them.

✅: The best way to know if you’re in a healthy relationship is to consider how that person makes you feel. Some of us are used to chaos and toxicity so it feels safe and familiar. But, true love feels safe, calm and empowering.

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