Dr. Nicole LePera Profile picture
Sep 24, 2022 6 tweets 1 min read Read on X
Childhood trauma is “invisible” but it’s always present in the nervous system.

It’s common for someone to say “I don’t have childhood trauma” but their bodies & behaviors tell a different story (🧵)
Do you wince or feel anxious when someone walks into a room? Do you want to connect with someone but cannot trust that they actually love you? Do you lack communication skills & immediately lash out or shut down?
Do you have beliefs like “I don’t matter” “no one cares what I have to say?” When you’re hurt do you struggle to regulate your emotions or even know what you actually feel?
Have you spent a majority of your adult life people pleasing or achieving to get love, validation, or approval? And now you wonder who you even are or why you feel so empty?
Our body doesn’t forget. Our behaviors reflect our past. The way we view ourselves & the world around us is forever changed when we experience childhood trauma.
Most important to understand is that childhood trauma doesn’t just look like severe abuse, neglect, & assault. Emotional neglect & abuse are so common in our society we just call it “normal.”

We have an entire society of adults living these consequences.

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More from @Theholisticpsyc

May 8
Nobody talks about grieving the father you wish you had…

A Thread 🧵:
Having a father who isn’t capable of being a father to you, is one the most painful thing a person can experience.
Many of us are born to insecure and wounded fathers. Men who run from their issues, who drink away their pain, or project their own self loathing onto us…
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May 7
A partner who is unfaithful is one of the most painful and difficult experiences.

Why People (actually) Betray Others:
Many people believe if someone loves them or cares about them, they will be faithful.

But a person’s ability to commit and be in integrity has everything to do with their own biology.
Research shows people with insecure attachment styles are associated with higher rates of infidelity. People who grow up with inconsistent or neglectful parent figures struggle with emotional regulation, making them more likely to act impulsively.
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May 4
When you talk to your mother she’s not actually listening, or the conversation always goes back to her.

Here’s Why:
When you talk to her, you see her eyes glaze over. She seems distracted and distant. She doesn’t ask many questions. And somehow every conversation comes back to her or how she feels.
You want to be close to her. You want to share your life, you want her to care. You want that feeling of emotional connection where you share and feel like she “gets it” without judging you.
Read 10 tweets
May 3
You knew your mother didn’t like you.

She was in competition with you, or seemed completely uninterested in your life.

A truth people don’t talk about:
There’s a cultural myth that all mothers are warm and nurturing. But the truth is, many mothers have children and resent them. They feel their children should meet their needs, and are still looking for mothering, themselves.
This meant your mother would over-share with their you. She’d expect you to care for her, to function as her therapist, and to consistently thank her for the sacrifices she made.

A task no child can take on.
Read 10 tweets
May 1
Sexual Discipline means your sexual behavior is aligned with your emotional, physical, and spiritual wellbeing.

Why it matters (a thread 🧵):
Having sexual discipline means you:
- don’t use sex as a distraction from your emotions
- choose partners who respect you and your body
- respect yourself and your own body
- know the difference between attraction and connection
Sexual expression is healthy and important.

But when it’s done to avoid, to cope, or impulsively without conscious thought— it can trigger attachment or trauma patterns that leave us feeling lonely and ashamed.
Read 10 tweets
Apr 29
A loving mother wires her child for lifelong resilience.

Her attuned presence becomes our blueprint for safety, regulation, and connection.

Why Motherhood Matters:
The first person who regulates our nervous system, is our mother beginning at conception. Our heart syncs with hers in the womb.

This is called biological synchrony.
Our mother builds our brain through the relationship we have with her. Her soothing voice and touch creates neural circuits in the brain linked to resilience and capability.
Read 9 tweets

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