Thread by @bingjiuwus

#liujiu, some light and fluffy stuff after yesterday's traumafest:

Liu Qingge was on the hunt.

It was a little known fact in Cang Qiong that the cultivators of Bai Zhan Peak actually did contribute to the sect's well-being when they weren't away on missions.

https://twitter.com/YumkinsPuff/status/1571230782861049859

They didn't smash up other peaks, though admittedly they did that too. Much as their martial siblings might throw a tantrum about it, the BZ philosophy was as such: our enemies aren't going to give you fair warning, why should we?

Not very popular logic. But it worked.

Cang Qiong was the grandest sect in the jianghu for a reason. BZ keeping the rest of the Peaks in alert condition was part of it.

Another was, well, keeping Cang Qiong _alive_.

See, the parts of the Peaks that the cultivators actually occupied were only a tiny sliver -

each Peak was a _mountain_, with all that entailed. Many a foolhardy young disciple who stepped off the well-worn paths that led to their classrooms and dormitories and headed down into the thick forests often disappeared and never returned.

For CQ's mountains, being sources of great spiritual energy, were also places of deep allure for spiritual beasts and monsters.

Monsters, such as the one LQG was hunting on Qing Jing Peak right now.

The Flying Rainbow Serpent was a spiritual snake that loved yin-rich waters

such as the waterfalls and rivers laced throughout the Peaks. One might think Xian Shu was the most yin-heavy source in all of CQ, but no, surprisingly it was QJ. And well, this troublesome snake had escaped its enclosure from Zhan You Peak and was darting its way through

QJ's bamboo forests while LQG kept pace on Cheng Luan. Because while the FRS might look delicate and beautiful, it was a venomous little bastard, who used its shimmering rainbow scales to entice its victims before sinking its fangs into their blood and sucking them dry of qi.

And they loved, absolutely loved yin cultivators!

There was no shortage of yin cultivators on QJ at present, and the Peak Lord would be furious if the FRS touched a hair on any of them. If LQG was successful in capturing it? Well, then no one would know.

If he failed?

There would be no failure. LQG sped up on CL as the FRS kept giving him the slip. That rotten snake despised yang energy like his, had bolted the moment it sensed his qi nearby.

Too bad. LQG saw it fly into a clearing, and propelled himself on CL,

drawing the sword to himself in mid-air. He was going to get that rotten serpent, goddammit. He was going to -

He was going to crash land right into someone taking a bath in QJ's legendary Quiet Pool - and yep, he did just that.

Fuck.

*

"Off," someone was wheezing.

"Get _off_ me already..."

LQG came back to consciousness with a furious headache and his body feeling as it had just slammed into a boulder. He was - fuck, he was _lying_ on someone, wasn't he.

Shit.

"Sorry," he slurred. Had he really crashed that hard? His vision refocused.

"I, uh..."

LQG fell suddenly silent. Because as much of an entrance his mess had just been, he had stumbled into a bonafide beauty. A thin, pale-skinned fairy was lying beneath him, with inky black hair clinging to his face and bare body.

The beauty was _staring_ at him too, with wide green eyes and flushed cheeks and a red-bitten mouth, no doubt from the embarrassment of being caught in such an indecent state. And oh, he was even trying to preserve what was left of his modesty, covering his chest with his slender

arms - then with a squeak, unfolding said arms to cover the little slip of dark hair between his legs. LQG couldn't help; he looked everywhere. The beauty's nipples were _pink_.

This must be what succubi were like, he realised. His pants were excruciatingly tight.

He had never, never been so aroused before. Fuck that snake, he could get it later. For now, he -

"Liu Qingge," the beauty snarled. "I am going to fucking tear your dick off if you don't get off me right now!"

Oh, right. He had just been peeping upon Shen Qingqiu, and now he was about to die.

Worth it? LQG thought bizarrely, and then SJ kneed him in the balls and made him realise that no, it actually wasn't.

*

As shameful as the incident had been, now that LQG had seen his most

loathed shixiong in a state of extreme indecency - and well, _loved_ it - he had come to a grim but understandable state of mind: SJ might be the most irritating person he had ever known, but he also gave LQG a boner.

_Frequently._

Now that he knew his shixiong had skin like

mutton fat jade from head to toe, that his nipples were as pink as his mouth (the exact same shade), he had a waist that would put half of Xian Shu to shame, well...

Let's just say LQG's dreams involved a lot less slaying demons, and a lot more of slaying his _personal_ demon.

Unfortunately, if SJ had always itched for a fight with him before, now he would turn heel the moment he saw LQG, even at Head Disciple meetings. It got to a point where even Shang Qinghua was concerned about him! SQH! If his squirrelly, nervous shixiong was worried about what

the hell was going on, then, well...

LQG had truly fucked up. Really.

*

"Shixiong."

"Mm, no," said SJ, and turned heel from the entrance of his Bamboo Cottage to head back in. LQG stuck his foot out before he could slam the door shut.

"You depraved bastard," SJ snarled.

"It's not enough for you to break my ribs every three months, you had to fucking spy on me while I was bathing, and now what? What the hell could you _possibly_ want from me?"

"I want..." LQG wet his lips. "To apologise."

"You want to what," SJ said flatly.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I _was_ being disgusting. I gawked at you; I shouldn't have. I wasn't thinking about your modesty at all..." Well, he had been, but for entirely the wrong reason.

SJ sneered, though he crossed his arms to cover his chest again, just like he had before.

"You say that as if I'm a maiden you just despoiled," he murmured. "Well. Am I?"

"Yes," said LQG, before the contrarian in him wanted to bark back and argue. "Yes, shixiong. If you want me to make amends, to pay you back, then I would - gladly. Please."

"Pay me back," SJ echoed. "Like a whore."

"_Not_ like a whore," LQG said, colouring furiously at the thought of his shixiong in some floaty silken robe with his hair down and nothing else. "Like... like someone I want to make amends to."

"Because I turn you on," SJ said.

"Yes," said LQG. "I mean no! I mean, fuck. Yes, Shen Qingqiu. You turn me on," he added, resigned. "I'm not happy about this either."

SJ's mouth twitched in amusement at last. "Pathetic, aren't you," he drawled. "To get this tripped up over seeing my bare elbow...

have you never seen a naked person before, Liu Qingge?"

Of course he had! But not like SJ, and in such a state.

"Hmm." His shixiong eyed him now, with a speculative look in his eyes LQG didn't know if he liked. "I won't take payment for anything you may or may not have seen.

But fair is fair. You've had the privilege of seeing me undone; I want the same."

"Sorry?" said LQG. "You want what, exactly?"

His shixiong snorted, moving away from the door to open it fully. "Come inside, shidi," he drawled. "And make yourself comfortable."

*

LQG had never felt insecure about his body before, but as he stood - very much naked - in front of his shixiong as he _perused_ said body with his eyes, expression inscrutable behind his paper fan, he began to feel, well, as if he was a prized bull for auction.

In other words, a little bit humiliating. But at the same time, he refused to cower. He had nothing to hide.

And indeed, as SJ's eyes slid down to his loins - and then he abruptly coughed and lifted his fan to cover his eyes, he realised... he didn't have much to feel humiliated about either.

Oh, LQG thought. He likes it. Because SJ could cover his face all he liked, but his ears were bright red.

(He wondered if he could make any other part of shixiong's body turn that cherry colour.)

"Does Shen-shixiong like what he sees?" he asked dryly.

"Shixiong, who the hell is your shixiong," SJ sniffed. "Acting like I haven't seen better."

"Sure you have," LQG said, feeling more confident now that he could _tell_ SJ was as embarrassed by this as much as he was. "But have they let you touch as well?"

"Touch what? What the hell are you talking about?" SJ squawked, waving his fan around aggressively. "Liu Qingge, you have no shame. Talking about touching all of a sudden, and being turned on, what is wrong with you."

A lot, apparently, LQG mused. "I like your body," he said.

"And you like mine."

"I do not."

"You can't look away from me," LQG countered.

"Alright, so what!" SJ scowled. "What do you want me to do when you look like the gods carved you out of jade themselves." He was scarlet now. "I couldn't look like that, not in a thousand years..."

"Don't want you to," LQG said immediately. "I love you as you are."

"You like my body, idiot, you hate the very concept of me otherwise," SJ snapped. "Fine. I am not touching you or whatever you think is going to happen. Put your clothes back on!"

He snapped his fan shut.

"But..."

He rubbed one very red cheek with his sleeve. "We can have a cup of tea. _If_ you behave."

"Yes, shixiong," LQG said, and pretended not to notice when SJ darted one last look at his abs.

LQG was on the hunt again, but unlike the last time around, he thought he might just finally land his catch.

END

(Bit of a random one here lmao. Did LQG ever catch the Flying Rainbow Serpent? How shooketh is SJ by the sudden perversity of his judgmental shidi?)