Thread by @Hey_There_Satan

A thread with sexworker Kaminari who made himself an OF account just so he could spend more money on video games and asexual photographer Shinsou who offers him camera advice.
(A silly thread based on an IRL experience🧵)

CW: talks about sexwork but this isn't a sexy thread, it's basically a silly meet-cute between #shinkami that is wildly different in ending than the one I had IRL because shinkami should always be together. I'm censoring OF to 'OrneryFlams' cuz bots.

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At first, it was just a joke. Denki complaining that all his savings were being spent on gacha games, and the collector's edition of a series he's been playing since the 90s, so "haha guess I'll make an OrneryFlams account!"

Bakugou would roll his eyes and affectionately (Denki /swore/ it was affectionate) tell him to shut the fuck up, but Kirishima and Mina were always happy to hype him up and be like "you'd be great at that, you're so social and fun!"

Which was nice until Sero added "I don't think the people on OrneryFlams are looking for 'social and fun' unless it shows its ass though."

Denki understood that it was a legit job. He wasn't one of those douchenozzles who pretends it's a get rich quick scheme that's easy.

Kaminari /knows/ how hard someone has to work in order to afford any kind of living on that kind of work alone. It'd be easier to do a 9 to 5 gig but he just can't swing it alongside his college schedule, lord knows he's tried.

So one day the joke just isn't a joke anymore and he makes an account. It takes him about 3 hours to film something that looks vaguely sexually appealing and he puts it online and waits...and waits...and waits.

Bakugou heard him complain and went "you have to market yourself, you fucking spoon," before he took Denki's laptop and made a few posts on websites that cater to this sort of thing. Denki WISELY kept himself from asking how Bakugou knew any of them, but it was a close call.

Finally, Katsuki said, "you're a loser and a nerd, where do you spend time online? That's where you should market yourself." Suddenly the answer was obvious. Denki should just advertise the same place he was wasting all that money to begin with!

So, the next time he logged into his favorite gacha game, he opened up the global chat lobby and said "who wants discount codes for my OrneyFlams account? A 15% off coupon to anyone who can beat my arena team!"

He didn't think it would work, honestly, cause Denki KNOWS just how much money you can sink into a game with all the microtransactions and bullshit money traps they have. If he saw that in chat he'd just ignore it and keep saving rare in-game currency for the gacha itself.

But he was a fairly popular player already, and people were actually interested! He got more subscribers from advertising in-game than he ever did elsewhere and made it a habit to talk about his OF whenever he was playing the game.

Denki wasn't making a living off of it, by any means, but he was finally getting some disposable income he could use to feed his filthy game addiction. If shaking his ass and taking a few toys on camera let him be irresponsible in gacha settings then so be it.

However, he started to get some not so nice feedback. The kind of people who were happy to tell him that his ass looked nice or whatever but he must have filmed the scene with a potato because they can't see fuck all in some of his videos.

Which was fair...and probably true.

He decided to vent about it on the in-game global chat, hoping he could find someone willing to either buy the videos anyway or offer some advice.

Which was when he got a strange request.

User 'FelineTired71,' a semi-familiar name because Denki had demolished his arena team and been demolished in return the week after, said, "I can't tell you if it's sexy or whatever, but I can give you tips on lighting and lens quality."

Denki's first thought was "score, someone who knows about cameras" but his second thought was "and it's a straight guy so he won't make it weird I guess" considering the user didn't seem very attracted.

Denki typed back, "thx! So nice to C str8 bois willing to help out the bis," getting a few laughs from the chat before FelineTired71 corrected him:

"I'm not straight, I'm asexual. So seeing ur pics will be like giving photography advice to someone shooting birds or graffiti. I'm not going to be distracted by lust or whatever, I can just comment on the photo quality itself."

And while Denki didn't appreciate being compared to birds, though he was chill about being compared to street art, he figured "why not?"

A few people in chat made jokes about how this was obviously a scam to get free photos and videos, but FelineTired71 said nothing to that.

Kaminari figured that worst case scenario it was a scam and FelineTired was just some random who wanted access to his OF and maybe to chat with a sexworker, but if that was true it'd be easy to block him at least.

Denki sent back "cool!! Ill dm u my discord and send you some examples!" while a few people in the chat complained about some "liar getting free pics" but as far as Denki was concerned if they wanted his pics so bad they could pay $7.99 a month for them like the rest.

Kaminari exchanged discords with the helpful stranger, half-convinced that he'd regret it but too tired of trying to understand the many photography youtube videos he'd attempted to watch. He was a hands on learner and had to ask questions so youtube didn't cut it.

He learned the man's name was Shinsou and he was actually a cinematographer by trade but worked mostly in forensics.

Denki immediately responded with, "just pretend I'm a crime scene, baby!" and learned Shinsou had mad sass cause he instantly replied, "well you /do/ deserve to be murdered for doing a vertical phone shot of your dick in lighting better suited to a cheap haunted house."

And okay, sue him, but Kaminari Denki fell a little bit in love with a man who looked at a photo of his asshole and went "you need a ring light...and a good friend who can tell you when they fuck up your bikini wax."

Denki spent the entire night sending Shinsou photo and video after photo and video and was surprised to find himself delighted every time the man on the other end of the chat made a dumb joke or a good barb, especially when he was patient enough to explain all the things after.

Kaminari knew from years of being friends with Bakugou that he was not a great student. He had to have things explained repeatedly and in different ways and it wasn't a fun time for anyone, but Shinsou never seemed to mind.

When Denki wasn't able to understand a concept, Shinsou even took a few photos of his cats to demonstrate a certain angle of how to position lamps, how to change the ISO, what the fuck an aperture is, and what the best beginner cameras were.

Kaminari was downright giddy to take new photos and videos over the next week, eagerly showing his progress to Shinsou who complimented him on what he got right and corrected the stuff he still didn't understand.

Nearly a month had passed and the two spoke constantly, no longer just Denki sending a dick pic and Shinsou saying stuff like "did you take this photo from the inside of a pickle barrel?" but actual conversation about their hobbies and interests.

They were both huge gamers so it was easy to complain about the latest banners and the shitty gacha rates, and how annoying the new meta was after certain overpowered characters got released. It was the most fun Denki had in ages.

And really, if doing sexwork had taught Kaminari anything it was that there were fewer things as sexy as someone who wasn't even remotely interested in him as a sexual object. When sex was your job it was hard not to see yourself as an extension of how your audience sees you.

Kaminari had gotten so used to posing, dressing, and acting in ways that he thought would be profitable or attractive that he'd been entirely shocked when Hitoshi displayed absolutely none of the same traits his usual viewers did.

Shinsou had no interest in sex, saying he jerked off on occasion but usually while multitasking and doing something else that was more interesting to him, and Kaminari couldn't have been happier to just be some guy and not his OF handle.

He had a bad habit of fleeting crushes on everyone he'd ever met, it wasn't a new problem for him, and he assumed at first that his feelings for Shinsou were just the same old issue.

But they only got stronger with every cat photo, every snarky comeback, and every camera tip.

When Shinsou and Kaminari finally agreed to date, everyone assumed it couldn't work. A sex positive sexworker and an asexual didn't seem like a mix that'd pan out, but Denki and Hitoshi were happy and that was all that mattered.

Besides, Denki couldn't say he was upset that after Shinsou moved in he had an in-house photographer and now plenty of cats to practice taking photos of.

~The End~

((Thanks for reading! If you're the OF girl I helped in that gacha game 2 years ago I promise I'm not in love with you, I just wanted to write fic XD.
For more Shinkami fics and threads and near-daily memes, follow or check my pinned post below!))

https://twitter.com/Hey_There_Satan/status/1249028706535985152?s=20&t=W6wx77u8W6cfJKc7KNv0vA

((And thanks to @/heffelumpz1 for coming up with OrneryFlams so I didn't get a bunch of porn bots XDDD))

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