Ben Meer Profile picture
Nov 22, 2022 13 tweets 2 min read Read on X
How to be a power couple.

Life Dinner Method:
Brad Feld is a multi-millionaire and venture capitalist at Foundry Group.

On the Tim Ferriss Podcast (Episode #448),

He reveals a powerful monthly relationship meeting he and his wife Amy follow (also a badass).

It's called "Life Dinner."
—Life Dinner: Why—

Life Dinner is a scheduled time to check in with your significant other.

It's like agile planning (with your most important client)

The process builds intimacy, trust, & accountability.

With a US divorce rate at 50%, we need new strategies like Life Dinner.
Here's the thing:

If you don't build well-defined systems to connect with your significant other,

It's far too easy for months to pass without checking in...

To let months pass feeling distant...

Or to have a critical convo go poorly because you weren't intentional about it.
—Life Dinner: How—

Set a recurring calendar invite on the 1st of every month.

The session can take as little as 20 mins

But it's better to have 1-2 hrs allotted (if you need it).
During "Life Dinner," you'll discuss 3 overarching categories:

1. Personal Reflection on Last Month

2. Relationship Reflection on Last Month

3. Personal Goals for Next Month

Let's dive into each…
1. Personal Reflection on Last Month

Guiding Questions:

• What could I have done better?

• What was I proud of?

• What's causing me anxiety?

• What am I worried about for the future?
2. Relationship Reflection on Last Month

Guiding Questions:

• What's one little thing we noticed about each other that we love?

• Are there things we learned about from our relationship?

• How might we want to improve moving forward?
3. Personal Goals for Next Month

Guiding Question:

• What do I want to achieve over the next 4 weeks?

(This is helpful for prioritization and accountability.)
Now, some guiding principles:

1. No stonewalling. Don't close up or detach while having tough conversations.

2. Be in the moment. Approach everything from a place of love. Ask thoughtful questions.

3. Prepare ahead of time. Keep a running journal of things you want to discuss.
The pinnacle of a relationship?

To grow together—emotionally, spiritually, and physically.

Which is why my long-term G.F. and I have followed Life Dinner for the past 24 months...

It's been an absolute game-changer for us.

I trust you'll find it valuable, too.
Thanks for reading! Follow me @SystemSunday for more threads on high-performance living.
P.S. If you like personal development, you will love my weekly newsletter (it’s free).

Every Sunday I feature the best systems for wealth, health, and free time.

Try it here:
getrevue.co/profile/system…

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More from @SystemSunday

Jun 19
9 soft skills to accelerate your career: Image
1. Make People Feel Important (SHR Method)

Your formula to be charismatic:

Seen
• Give eye contact
• Offer a specific compliment

Heard
• Ask good questions
• Be interested, not interesting

Remembered
• Follow up
• Remember name(s)
• Recall something you discussed
2. Hone Your Body Language (7-38-55 Rule)

People will like/dislike your communication based on:

• 7% words
• 38% tonality and face
• 55% body language

Stand up straight, pull your shoulders back, make eye contact, smile, give a firm handshake...

You will be dangerous.
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Jun 17
7 rules for saving money

(that one day might save you): Image
1. 50/30/20 Budget Rule

Allocate your income to 50% needs, 30% wants, 20% savings.
2. 1% Rule to Curb Impulse Buys

If the item is over 1% of your annual gross income, wait 3 days.

If you still want the item after 3 days, get it.

You’ll often realize you don’t actually want/need that thing.
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Jun 12
How to fall asleep quickly.

The 4-7-8 Method (backed by science):
In 60 seconds, you'll have the life hack to falling asleep fast.

The breathing technique was popularized by Dr. Andrew Weil

(based on the ancient yoga practice of pranayama).

Here we go, the 4-7-8 Method:
First, why it works:

"It works by activating the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for our rest and digest mode,

while switching off the sympathetic nervous system, which triggers our stress response (or fight or flight mode)." —Hannah Coates, Vogue
Read 7 tweets
May 16
"Not taking things personally is a superpower." —James Clear

5 mental models to develop thick skin: Image
1. Spotlight Effect (Cognitive Bias)

We think people are paying far more attention to us than they are.

Harsh truth:

Your freedom begins the day you realize nobody is thinking about you.
2. The 'Procedure or Perception' Razor

When you receive negative feedback, ask yourself:

- Should I change my procedure (actions I take)?
- Or should I change my perception (how I interpret the advice)?

Avoid constructive feedback from people who've never constructed anything.
Read 8 tweets
Apr 3
17 powerful ideas to conquer procrastination:

1. Follow the 2-Minute Rule; if something takes less than two minutes, do it right then (Credit: David Allen). Image
2. The best productivity app on your phone is called Airplane Mode (use it).

3. You might not be lazy but just burned out. If you’re a high achiever and in a rut, then rest.
4. Find your purpose with Ikigai (what you love, what the world needs, what you can be paid for, and what you're good at); Purpose is the antidote to procrastination.

5. Spotlight Effect: Your freedom begins the day you realize nobody is thinking about you.
Read 9 tweets
Mar 14
20 sentences that will maximize your social intelligence:

1. To solve an issue quickly, be soft on the person and hard on the problem.
2. Pretend everyone was sent to teach you something.

3. Pause in speaking + eye contact = confidence.

4. Make people feel important with the SHR Method: Seen, Heard, Remembered.

5. A person’s favorite sound is their name, so remember it (h/t Dale Carnegie).
6. “Praise publicly. Criticize privately.” —Warren Buffett

7. To give feedback, first make the other person feel you care about them.

8. “Unspoken expectations are premeditated resentments.” —Neil Strauss
Read 8 tweets

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