Thread by @JillianWeise

I'm very tired of secret-disabled people.

I can't even write the essay about it bc I already wrote that essay: lacancircle.com.au/psychoanalysis…

There are so very many secret-disabled people in my life. I need the secrecy around disability to stop OR I need to figure out my own boundaries around secret-disabled people.

Hmmm. #Boundaries #BoundaryWork

Yeah, I can do something about my own boundaries.

Preliminary boundary: If you are secret-disabled? I will move my bodymind away from you. I do not consent to be in close relation to secret-disabled ppl.

THATS AN INTENSE BOUNDARY.

I KIND OF LOVE IT.

I WILL SLEEP ON IT.

But truly: at this juncture? when I don't have a choice about being "out" as disabled bc my body outs me? & I'm going thru hell for being "out" as disabled? Why actually would I cultivate friendships w/

secret-disabled people? and for that matter, why would I cultivate friendships with ANY people who even ARE disabled but dont do shit for disabled people? don't advocate, don't post, don't tweet, don't do shit?

So what would that boundary be?

I consent to friendships with abled ppl who dont do shit for disabled ppl. And disabled ppl who do A LOT for disabled ppl. There's no in-between with me. You're either abled & being abled. Or your disabled & being really disabled about it.

Actually, I kind of like that. I like the honesty of it. I like the bleakness of it. I like how its a boundary I don't have to use a lot of mental energy to figure out: are you this or this or this or this. I've been using way, way too much energy on: secret-disabled ppl and

"oh I'm disabled but I only said it that one time out loud and then I went back into my other identities, you know, the identities that are easier for me to be."

Like no.

I don't have time for those friendships.

Someone might be thinking: "Uh oh. Cy will wake up and regret tweeting this."

Nope. I woke up. And I love that I tweeted this.

The new boundary of mine stays.