Cy. Profile picture
Feb 14 4 tweets 2 min read
I will tell you this about that, tho.

If you're disabled and you tell a disabled friend, "Your friendship is not accessible to me right now. I will talk to you in a few months." Woah, person will get mad at you.

That's ok. Let em get mad.
Do you think you have to be friends with every disabled person in the entire world who wants your friendship?

Do you think you have to be friends on the terms set by the other person?

And if so? Why do you think that?
And could it be bc a bunch of abled ppl convinced you thru media & w/e that you, disabled BEAUTY, cannot make friends? Or cannot keep friends? So you have to put up with shit? from the so-called friends?

You dont need ANY friend who disregards yr consent. #Friendship
Some abled people right now: 🤯

Those same abled people: Can I do this too?

Yes, you can. You have consents in friendships.

Also, of course this applies toward disabled-person-with-abled-person friendship. Like, obviously.

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More from @JillianWeise

Feb 14
One of my support ppl right now

(I have like a team of 17 support ppl bc this workplace harassment been going on a minute so obviously I have team of support ppl & I told each "dont be obvious on social")

is indubitably watching me tweet & abt to txt:
How do I know? Because that specific support person? That is her only thing she says. She says, "I am here to tell you to get off the internet" and I say back "thank you very much. That is excellent advice. For someone else. You still wanna support tho?" and she says, "YES."
She is my designated Le Tigre.
Read 12 tweets
Feb 14
Flashback. Summer 2020.

Me to my therapist: I'll just move to FSU. It's my dream job. I know they haven't technically conferred tenure but whatever. I trust them to do it.

Therapist: YOU WILL DO NO SUCH THING. YOU WILL WAIT FOR THE PAPERWORK WITH THE TENURE
I'm about to paraphrase this next convo w/ FSU administrator in Summer 2020.

Me to FSU Admin: What is taking so long with the paperwork? I already have tenure at Clemson. I'm a Full Professor. What's the hold up conferring tenure at FSU for this job ya'll just gave me?
Read 6 tweets
Feb 14
Relatedly: Here's a text I sent earlier.

This is about #Consent and #VoiceMemos you receive. Did you know you get to STOP LISTENING to a voice memo a friend sends you? Yeah, you can stop listening. At any point. And you can tell the friend: I stopped listening.
By the way, I am dropping my own text messages in the above.

The only time I drop other peoples text messages? 1) I get consent to do it or 2) the people are abusers and the text messages are showing pattern/abuse
What is that dadgum line I wrote a couple months back on this very app? I meant to keep that line somewhere. Something like: I know you are trying to find ways to crucify me. Mind your own crosses.
Read 4 tweets
Feb 14
Could someone tell me what AI/app we all use to find mutuals of someone we don't consent to being mutuals with?

I need that app. I don't have time to play "who's friends with who" in the followers. An app can do that for me.

#UnfollowAbusers #UnfollowAbusersFriends #Obviously
And hey, I get that not everybody can do this.

I get that I have privilege. I have a job I'm willing to quit if the abuse continues, evolves, or IS NOT TAKEN SERIOUSLY BY HIGHER UPS.

I don't need the job.

That's a great place to be. Not everybody has that class advantage.
And yeah, I realize some of you are on the job market right now. You need salary and health insurance. So you can't exactly go around unfollowing ppl on the search committees & such.

You can't. But I can. I have tenure. What else am I supposed to do with tenure?

#Academics
Read 4 tweets
Feb 13
If you are an older woman, and you are in an abusive relationship right now -- I mean this week, this month, this year gotdammit -- and you cannot figure out a way to get out? of that abusive relationship? I want you to know that I see you.
I am with you and I am on your side. I do not care if that abusive relationship has led you to do things and be involved in things you never would have, otherwise, been involved in. It is not your fault. It is entirely the fault of your abusive husband. Now how do we help?
"If you're an older woman, you may face challenges related to your age & the length of your relationship. You may have grown up in a time when domestic violence was simply not discussed ..."
Read 5 tweets
Feb 12
Why is the word "access" a signifier that slips to "love."

Access is not love. Access is the law.

I don't need you to "love" me in order to make something accessible.

In fact, I don't want your "love." That implies a relationship I don't consent to.
This is not easy shit to say publicly because of how widely adopted access = love.

Justin Dart started this.

Justin Dart's motto: "I love you. Lead on."

No. I don't love you. I don't have to love you. Love is not part of my bid for civil rights. I won civil rights in 1990.
This idea that I, a disabled person, need to "love" you, in order to get access from you?

That seems abusive to me. Actually. Now that I think about it.

I should have access because it is the law.

Not because I love you.

Not because I show you any kind of "special" emotion
Read 12 tweets

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