Thread by @Julie_Bell_

What a contrast!

I can confirm the first approach works.

Emily grew up being taught the male supremacist doctrine in the second slide, but she got out.

Emily' blog is called Thriving Forward

thrivingforwardblog.com/about/

Emily is one of scores of girls who were abused by fundamentalist leader Bill Gothard (guru of the Duggar family of "19 Children & Counting" fame, whose elders son Josh Duggar, once the director of the far right Family Research Council, is now in prison for SA & CP.)

Unfortunately the lawsuit failed, but the complaints about Gothard, & his brother, go back decades.

themodestyfiles.com/episodes/85hz3…

It was Gothard's fall from grace, & that of a few others like fundamentalist homeschooling advocate Doug Phillips of "Vision Forum", that promoted me to start "The List" in the 2000s, bc I was annoyed that the guys lecturing us on modesty & submission were perverts themselves.

Little did I know that "The List", of a few score prominent "Christian celebrities", all with strong views on "male headship" & the subjugation of women, would grow to be thousands, & then tens of thousands, of evangelical pastors & church leaders.

itisforfreeedom.blogspot.com/2020/08/promin…

There's a personal aspect to all this. Growing up in NZ, my step-father went to Bill Gothard seminars & internalized his misogynistic views. Then later, I collided with American missionaries who had been indoctrinated the same way.

itisforfreeedom.blogspot.com/2006/10/why-di…

Which led to me being "shunned" or "excommunicated" by the missionary expat community that was my only company as a young mother.
itisforfreeedom.blogspot.com/2006/10/why-di…

I'm happy to report that the wife in this story, who grew up immersed in the homeschool fundamentalism of Gothard's "Institute for Basic Life Ministries" (like Emily Elizabeth Anderson & Anna Duggar) eventually broke free, & like Emily, #gotout & is now doing well.

This is a study in how the tentacles of the insidious male headship "complementarian" doctrine stretched all the way from its cradle in the "Bible Belt" of USA to impact a girl growing up in rural New Zealand & later, a young mum on the mission field.

Here's the insights of the girl who grew up in Gothardism, who I later met on the mission field:

roxanneswildworld.blogspot.com/2014/03/why-wh…

Nothing like ex cult members who #gotout to bring the goods on the layers of indoctrination holding millions of people (like the Duggars) in bondage.

roxanneswildworld.blogspot.com/2014/03/why-wh…

So there you have it. Detailed accounts from Emily Elizabeth Anderson, Roxanne Anderson (no relation) & myself, on how the sexist & misogynist doctrines espoused by folks like Lori Alexander cause such bondage & misery, & how good it is to be finally #freeindeed

Here's another facet. I don't know of Emily & Roxanne ever personally knew Alyssa, but certainly they would have known of her, because she was held up as the poster girl for "courtship" & "godly womanhood".

Alyssa would have earned the "Transformed Wife" tick of approval for sure. But the insider's look was hell on earth. Imagine falling unconscious during sex bc the husband must be obeyed & catered to, even if you're deathly sick. She thought she would die.

We'd actually quite appreciate not being told that wives are "penis homes" for men & "methadone" for husbands' porn addictions & that women capable of pastoring & preaching are "Jezebels" responsible for the ruination of society & the toppling of godly regimes, too.

This is another piece of the jigsaw.

"Evangelical girls are pre-groomed".

We are expected to be:

Good
Quiet
Obedient
Deferential
Compliant
To not make a fuss

To preserve male privilege & uphold male authority.

It also sets girls up for birth trauma, sexual abuse & DV.

https://twitter.com/LauraRbnsn/status/1627845866894553090?t=Qxi9xb8DEhgDVD6GOuAtTQ&s=19https://twitter.com/LauraRbnsn/status/1627845866894553090?t=Qxi9xb8DEhgDVD6GOuAtTQ&s=19

Laura @LauraRbnsn also writes,

"We relentlessly acculturate girls in the church to put up with anything, to sit under anything, to ignore everything ..."

That's what it was like for me, Roxanne, Emily, Alyssa & millions of others.

And if we resist? Or rebel?

Jezebel.

As a doula (childbirth coach), I could make a whole new thread about Evangelical Good Girls (TM) & how Good Girl Syndrome & people-pleasing & religious body shaming & sexual hang ups & menstrual shaming makes them susceptible to obstetric bullying & coercion.