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The Rumbling Profile picture
@DaRumbling
Mar 13, 2023 • 31 tweets • 8 min read • Read on X
Amazing

"He's the love of my life but I left him because I needed more me time"

I don't even think this is a kind of selfishness

I think this is the phenomenon I've talked about before were social media is causing young women to have para social relationships with themselves
Social media and influencers, and now particularly with TikTok

We have this very widespread behavior of watching yourself, talk to yourself

Social Media categorically requires a fair bit of ego, but this front camera day in the life of shit is a different monster
First and foremost, you're no longer living or experiencing anything, because everything is content

Everything is curated, everything is for an audience

Everything must be perfect within the definition of whatever "brand" you have established
But the bigger issue here feels like one of self-obsession, this is the parasocial relationship

It's most likely entirely unavoidable because you are literally spending large portions of basically every day looking at yourself that's looking at yourself
I would almost bet money that the issue with this guy was that he wanted to spend time with her, he wanted her to be filming herself less

He intruded upon the relationship she has with her other self, the self inside the phone screen
It's really sad, because she effectively found a soulmate

She decided at a young age she wants to live the luxury vagabond life and be a van hippie

And then she found a guy that she really likes, who's about the same age, who's good looking, who wants the same life
But because parasocial relationships are inherently bad, inherently toxic, it's always going to end up this way

I'm betting this is far more widespread than most people realize, as a lot of young women seek to become influencers
This is probably responsible for a lot of very questionable dating behavior among young women as well

Because you're inherently pre-selecting for men that aren't interested in you

A guy genuinely interested in you is going to require you to take time away from your other self
On the other hand, some scummy player who's only there to get his dick wet and eat your food doesn't care that you don't have time for him

Because he literally doesn't want that, he wants to get his dick wet and leave
I'm immediately reminded of the many videos I've seen of young women complaining about how many guys spend too long in the "Talking phase"

That's the part of the relationship that takes time, that takes time away from your parasocial relationship with yourself
Just imagine how frustrated guys have to be

You're a guy that found the perfect girl, the complete perfect match, who's also incredibly attractive AND she told you you're the love of her life

And it still isn't enough
I genuinely don't think so

The more I observe this younger generation the more I think the sexual behavior is downstream from this self parasocial behavior

It's a side effect of wanting to be your own spouse

Self imposed Truman Show is a PERFECT description

Normalization of extreme "selflove"

Straight men aren't given this, but you'll notice gay men are which is why they make up a noticeable portion of this kind of content too

You're probably right

But her self parasocial relationship means that true "alone time" is so incredibly rare as to be more important than anything else

It's self inflicted

This doesn't actually change anything

She's living in his self inflicted situation that is, in part, for her parasocial self, and stalling life indefinitely for it

Also the entirety of human history is built on young couples living in small spaces

No it's a thread about the ever increasing parasocial issue that's growing among young people in western society using this particular video as a jumping off point

It's pretty sure straight forward tbh

This is actually where I first started getting the idea of the parasocial self

They're obsessed with the person on the screen, the persona of who they are, it's one sided because your reflection can't love you back

It's unconscious narcissism

It's the entire premise of the thread, I literally went into great detail about it

See above

I wouldn't say faux because to them I believe the relationship *feels real* but the relationship can't be real because again your reflection cannot reciprocate

I would call it true narcissism, but I think that makes this sound like a personal issue where I think this is more a cultural one which is why I avoided it entirely

I can't imagine how you WOULDN'T

It's why I refuse to make any real attempt to monetize this account

I don't want ANY obligation to the "Skull King"

A big part of why this thread is so long and why I care is because I'm starting to believe this is "just what the kids do" in the same way in the 50s/60s kids suddenly went to burger joints and listened to rock & roll

And I think that's a problem

You'll notice that I never once said it was wrong

I said it was sad to find your soulmate and decide to leave them but never that it was incorrect

I have full agency and respect of that choice, intentionally

I avoided these kinds of tropes because of her age

Hypergamy is a learned behavior but my theory is that much of it modernly is downstream of something bigger, an overarching cultural quality something I'm gonna clean up and call Narcissus Syndrome

I want to differentiate from narcissism because by its definition narcissism is self aware and thereby a personal issue

Narcissus Syndrome is not personal, people are not self aware
This is what you'd expect right?

There is almost a feeling that we "older" people are functioning under a different set of definitions

If we take her face value and except her claim of love how does it reconcile with the older definition and behavior?

I promise I'm not trying to be mean

But even now in defense of yourself you are directing me to your CONTENT and self promoting

Even the wording feels a little overly congenial and hollow in the way an influencer would talk to up engagement

This will be the last thing I add and then I'm done with this because people keep bringing this up

You're correct, parasocial relationships are defined by lack of reciprocity

Why do you think she needed space and independence to go "find herself"?

I lied, one last thing

People ask why do I care, why put so much effort (lol) into this?

Because I want to do what nobody did for millennials, which is to actually take the time to understand what the internet is doing to young people, culturally and sociologically
20 years ago nobody asked what the internet was doing to young people, how it was going to influence them and how they would grow up differently because of it

Many of the issues we deal with as a people stem from this simple fact

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More from @DaRumbling

The Rumbling Profile picture
May 29, 2024
Probably will be unpopular but as I've gotten older my opinion has increasingly become that married people shouldn't be doing single people things

At best it shows an inability to mature and move on, at worst it's ulterior motives
Something I think millennials missed, as an act of rebellion and/or to differentiate from the boomers, is that becoming "boring" as you mature is partly about removing temptation from life and that's a good thing
Millennials struggle with the concept of temptation, there's this silly idea that if temptation is a problem for you you're in the wrong

"Oh you have to avoid it, why because you want it?! That means you want it no matter what!!"

It's ignorant of what "temptation" is
Read 8 tweets
The Rumbling Profile picture
May 17, 2024
The psyop on millennial women was basically perfect

They got conned into doing everything that would make it difficult to find a husband or even a LTR while simultaneously being told anything a man has to say about it is wrong by default, making it so they can never correct
It's actually quite sad but also completely unfixable because at this point they cannot and will not learn, it's impossible, like asking a fish to do algebra
The worst part is that many of these women had great potential that's why they're successful in their own independent life.

There's a reason colleges were used to create this monster, it filtered out the highest potential women

It's population control
Read 5 tweets
The Rumbling Profile picture
May 4, 2024
Every time a woman describes this it's dispassion that she's trying to describe. This doesn't make it better but it can be an understandable lesson

Being a boring turbonormie with zero passion about ANYTHING is off putting to everyone. It feels disingenuous because WHO ARE YOU?
There's a reason soyjacking marvel fanboy redditor's still manage to get married

Being cringe about whatever it is you feel strongly about is putting yourself out there. Having zero strong emotions about ANYTHING gives off the message you're afraid of the world and/or lying
I remember years back driving with my wife, stuck in the hell that is DC metro traffic on 495

I was getting pissed and finally snapped, started cussing and driving like it was Tokyo Drift

After we cleared it my wife put her hand on my arm and said "that was really hot"
Read 10 tweets
The Rumbling Profile picture
May 3, 2024
The bear question has blown open manipulative irrational female behavior

At first everyone choosing the bear could have been written off as "doing the bit"

Then the barrage of think pieces of about *why* they chose the bear started, they did this voluntarily too
It went from a kind of "girls rule, boys drool" thing to women genuinely trying to convince everyone that a 600lbs walking wood chipper with butcher knives for fingers is earnestly safer

This is when it became clear this wasn't a bit, but a genuine interpretation
It showed us that women do not value facts or reality, that they'll do everything, including being objectively, publicly, voluntarily, wrong about something, and will double down over and over and rely on manipulative emotional language in attempts to obfuscate reality
Read 9 tweets
The Rumbling Profile picture
Apr 30, 2024
"just get married in your 30s" will always lead to this, always
Men are more adaptable, after a certain point we just adjust to new circumstances and make do

It's the core of the "men's will just live like this" meme

What women refuse to acknowledge is that yes, men will just live like that, across most all circumstances Image
Women are the exact opposite, they continually pursue the same outcome regardless of how much they or their circumstances have changed

It's the core of the "female dating profile 6', 6", 6 figures" meme

These two aren't compatible Image
Read 12 tweets
The Rumbling Profile picture
Apr 24, 2024
This is expected convergence of internet social theory and the reality of meatspace colliding

A lot of it fueled by women (and anon bad actors) purposefully misconstruing the idea of "the wall" and how to navigate the reality it represents Image
This discussion has been had to death but for the sake of clarity we'll define the wall as:

The point at which the tangible benefits of youth and attractiveness peak and begin trending downward

Simpler: when you can no longer cash in on being young and cute
That definition is purposefully gender neutral because men absolutely hit the wall too, it just impacts us a lot less because we universally benefit from "youth and attractiveness" a lot less

Men build value, women MAINTAIN value, different rulesets
Read 12 tweets

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