Thread by @dyingscribe

You guys ever read Empowered?

Imma give you a run down of all the main characters.

First we have "Empowered" aka Elissa Megan Powers

The MC and the butt of the joke of the superhero community, and there are a lot of jokes.

She's wanted to be a superhero since she was a little girl but her powers come in the form of an unreliable super suit. (1)

The "hypermembrane" is a sapient skintight & very clingy supersuit that will not function if anything is worn over/under it.

Very fragile but self-fixing, it grants her the strength of 10-15 men, incredible durability & energy blasts as long as she maintains her self confidence.

Emp is very lacking in self-confidence & consistently traumatized as she watched her father die of an anuerysm in front of her as a child. She's often sexually assaulted/tied up in her work as a superhero because no one takes her seriously.

Also, has a lot of body image issues.

Emp's boyfriend, aka Thugboy, a half-asian (?) former minion for hire who made extra money double-crossing and killing the supervillains hiring him and his friends, the Witless Minions.

He is a former member of the San Antonio Capekillers, a short-lived but succesful group.

The San Antonio Capekillers was a group formed amidst a riot in SA, of normal humans who decided to...

well, you can guess.

From his success there, Thugboy decided he liked killing supers and would continue to do so until he met one that put the fear of God into him.

Ninjette, Emp's best friend, is a heavily traumatized alcoholic kunoichi who started out as a villain of Empowered's from a horribly fucked up ninja clan.

She is very into her best friend's boyfriend but does her best not to try anything. She is also unintentionally celibate.

Caged Demonwolf, Molestor of Worlds, is an eldritch abomination Emp pokeballed into an alien power-draining belt.

He lives on her coffee table, watching tv, and provides narration happily cause he knows he'll be out in no time as he is totally immortal & can see through time.

Sistah Spooky, Emp's former rival, and only other girl on her super team/

A former nerdy black girl who hates pretty blondes for bullying her in high school, she summoned a demon to accidentally give her super mystical powers in addition to a glow-up in exchange for her soul.

Mindfuck, Sistah Spooky's gf, is a telepath strong enough to read minds from orbit.

After her brother removed her tongue and eyes to make her a stronger telepath, she believes she is evil like him and is constantly altering her mind to be altruistic.

Correction, Mindfuck is Sistah Spooky's former gf because Spooky had so much self-loathing and hatred for blonde women, she didn't trust MF to really love her.

Anyway, MF is pathologically unable to lie and is constantly puppeting her own mind to be "good."

The Superhomeys, one of the premier superhero teams that accepted Empowered originally as an associate member.

They're good enough to be considered the most powerful and well known, despite being composed mostly of petty, self-obsessed jerks who enjoy tormenting Emp.

The Superhomeys are composed of at least two members who got powers from an STD.

Protean, who slept with an alien princess (see picture 3) and Mechanismo who got a ladybot's nanotech STD (see pic 3)

I was also wrong about Emp, SS and MF being the only girls on the team. There's Divangelic, conjoined twins with demon/angel powers, as well.

Also, Phallik (guess), and Major Havoc in the back. Also Captain Rivet, one of the good guys on the team who inspired Emp to be a hero.

There's also Maidman, who's basically just Batman but in a french maid costume.

No powers, just really good in combat and with a broom.

On to the villains, we have Manny.

A 10 year old cancer patient whose greatest wish was to be a supervillain. He managed to gain superhuman intelligence and built a battle mech out of hospital equipment. Emp's biggest fan, he was put into brain-death by a biokinetic villain.

Mindfuck's brother, Brainbow, was a powerful telepath but a meek, kind guy who was driven to depression by his job as a government-hired telepath so he telepathically killed his empathy.

That didn't go well. And he became a lunatic called Neurospear.

Last but not all of them is Willy Pete, a man turned fire elemental, or maybe a fire elemental that gained sentience and thinks he's a man, is a Southern sounding supervillain with a penchant for... well.

You can see.