Laurie Garrett Profile picture
Apr 30, 2023 6 tweets 5 min read Read on X
Some @POTUS @JoeBiden quips at last night's @WhiteHouse Correspondents Dinner:
"Like I often say, don’t compare me to the Almighty, compare me to the alternative.
We added 12 million jobs, and that's just counting the lawyers -- who defended the president." (Laughter.)
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2/ "I had a lot of #RonDeSantis jokes ready, but Mickey Mouse beat the hell out of me & got there first. (Laughter & applause)
Now, look, can’t be too rough on the guy. After his reelection as governor, he was asked if he had a mandate. He said, 'Hell no, I’m straight'.”
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3/ "Look, it’s great the cable news networks are here tonight. @MSNBC owned by NBC Universal. @FoxNews owned by #Dominion Voting Systems. (Laughter)
Last year, your favorite Fox News reporters were able to attend because they were fully vaccinated & boosted.
This year.."
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4/ "This year, with that $787 million settlement, they’re here because they couldn’t say no to a free meal. (Laughter)
And hell, I’d call Fox honest, fair & truthful, but then I could be sued for defamation. (Laughter)
It ain’t nothing compared to what they do to me. (Laughs)" Image
5/ "Look, I hope the @FoxNews team finds this funny. My goal is to make them laugh as hard as @CNN did when they read the settlement. (Laughter) But then again, CNN was like, 'Wow, they actually have $787 million?' (Laughter)
I go where the people are --"
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6/ "'The Daily Show.' (Applause)
Roy [Wood, Jr] is a great guy. He once dubbed me the Jay-Z of Delaware. (Laughter)
Tonight he asked me to keep it short. He even offered me 10 bucks if I’d keep it under 10 mins. That’s a switch: a President being offered hush money." Image

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More from @Laurie_Garrett

Jul 19
As #JoeBiden hunkered down in Delaware & Party leaders scrambled to figure out how #Democrats can win the election, I kept thinking of March 31, 1968. On that day the White House put out word of a mysterious speech LBJ would give from the Oval Office.
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@BeschlossDCImage
2/
In a world without Internet or 24-hour news cycles the buzz in Washington about the event failed to reach the American people until that night. America assumed LBJ’s address would be about the widening war in Vietnam. On live television, a very haggard-looking LBJ began:
MORE Image
3/
"Good evening, my fellow Americans:
Tonight, I want to speak to you of peace in Vietnam and Southeast Asia.
No other question so preoccupies our people. No other dream so absorbs the 250 million human beings who live in that part of the world."
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Read 16 tweets
Jul 9
While #Trump claims no direct connection to #Project2025 it's clear han no #Republican in national power has denounced the Heritage Foundation 887-page manifesto. I put a few hours into scrutinizing the Project's plans for @HHSGov & health agencies. (pages 449-502)
🧵unfolds: Image
2/Health & Human Services @HHSGov must “respect for the sacred rights of conscience” for Federal workers & healthcare workers broadly who object to #Abortions contraception, gender reassignment & other issues.
“Radical actors inside & outside govt are promoting..."
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3/ “...harmful identity politics that replaces biological sex w/subjective notions of 'gender identity' & bases a person’s worth on his or her race, sex, or other identities. This destructive dogma, under the guise of 'equity,' threatens American’s fundamental liberties..."
MORE Image
Read 17 tweets
Jul 5
When a society attacks its toiling scientists, ranking the opinions of quacks, religions & charlatans above those of scientific insight and discovery, it is a sorrowful time.
Scientists who have been persecuted for their work...
MORE
2/
-Muhammad ibn Zakariyā Rāzī or Rhazes of Baghdad (860 - 932 AD) beaten into blindness for introducing medical advances from non-Arab countries
MOREImage
-Michael Servetus (1511-1553) made discoveries in blood circulation. Burned at the stake by Calvin in Geneva
-Henry Oldenburg (1619-1677) promoted sharing scientific insights, labelled a spy, held in the Tower of London
MOREImage
Image
Read 11 tweets
Jul 1
In 4 earth-shattering decisions this term, #SCOTUS gutted authority from all federal regulatory agencies. These are very radical decisions – essentially overturning all the sentiments of our nation’s founders debated in The Federalist Papers.
In this 🧵I'll lay it out.Image
2/Today, w/Corner Post v Federal Reserve #SCOTUS decided that anybody can sue a fedl agcy, over anything, w/no statute of limitations.
Dissenting, Justice Jackson: “The majority throws caution to the wind & engages in...misguided reasoning about statutory limitations periods..."
MORE
supremecourt.gov/opinions/23pdf…Image
3/Jackson: "The far-reaching results of the Court’s ruling in this case are staggering.”
“In one fell swoop, the Court has effectively eliminated any limitations period for APA lawsuits....This means that, from this day forward, administrative agencies can be sued in perpetuity over every final decision they make."
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Read 20 tweets
Jun 14
This utterly reprehensible Pentagon disinfo campaign executed by the #Trump admin to create Asian suspicion of the Chinese #COVID #vaccine is reminiscent of the CIA's use of a fake #polio vax effort in Pakistan to obtain...
MORE

&
csis.org/blogs/smart-gl…
reuters.com/investigates/s…
...DNA samples from children living in the Osama bin Laden compound in 2011. In both cases, geopolitics trumped public health, leading to countless deaths, assaults on health workers and vaccinators and undermining the credibility of #vaccines . This is appalling.
More
In resp to angry public health leaders who later learned of the 2011 #CIA/#polio/binLaden effort, the #Obama admin on May16, 2014 stated that since Aug2013 a policy was in place forbidding the CIA from using #vaccination progs, workers, or genetic materials obtained...for intell.
MORE
Read 4 tweets
May 9
Trump’s deal to Big Oil [give my campaign $1B & all #Biden climate & green policies will be void] echoes the Teapot Dome Scandal in another #Republican #POTUS race 100 yrs ago. Until now, it was the biggest presidential corruption case in US history.
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history.com/topics/roaring…
2
In 1920, the US Navy was converting its fleet from coal to oil and wanted oil on federal lands reserved for military needs. Republican Warren Harding was running for POTUS: he told oil execs to back him & he would let them drill those reserves. When he became President...
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3
Harding appointed mining bigwig & Big Oil ally Alfred Fall as Sec. of Interior. Fall handed over prime oil drilling rights to Sinclair's Mammoth Oil & 1 other company, without competitive bidding. By 1923 Sinclair was sucking so much oil out of Teapot Dome WY that...
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Read 12 tweets

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