Thread by @wilkins_kathryn

“Hillsong is the last church that I will ever go to this side of heaven.”

“I don’t consider myself a Christian anymore.”

“I’m a really happy atheist.”

“It’s been 4 years now since I stepped in a church.”

(Quotes from @hulu #secretsofhillsong )

1/x

Spiritual abuse has real consequences: people no longer can step foot in places of worship.

I’m not debating whether or not ppl should retain faith in the church after abuse.

I’m not shaming anyone for leaving the faith.

2/x

When a person’s reaction to being spiritually abused is to:

Leave church
Leave the faith
Deconvert
Take a break from church
Re-evaluate & change theological beliefs

The very communities who abused them will say,

“See? They were never sincere anyway…” to justify the harm. 3/x

This feels personal to me bc:

In our recovery, our views of things such as egalitarianism & polity have changed.

This will undoubtedly be used by our former faith communities to confirm that we were never one of them (that they were right to excommunicate us for “slander”). 4/x

After our abuse, the ppl who received us w love & welcome (when everyone else shunned or ignored us) were ppl who had different theological beliefs from ours.

Let me offer: it’s not only ok but RIGHT for this kind of experience to lead to a re-evaluating & change of beliefs. 5/x

Kelly Kapic (friend & author) told us early on:

it’s normal & healthy for new beliefs to arise as we surround ourselves with new community.

I’ll be honest: I long for ppl to know the Jesus we’ve come to know even more intimately as we heal from church abuse.

But… 6/x

Be cautious about how u perceive & judge spiritual abuse victims - trauma changes brain chemistry.

Healing brings things into perspective & shifts priorities.

Their shifting beliefs NEVER justify the harm done to them.

Grieve w those who grieve. 7/7 #churchtoo #9markstoo