The truely intens and overwhelming thing is that what finally pushed me through my transient language impairments, analaysis paralysis and other disabilities to turn anything in is others demanding intensely more from me than I can navigate.
So I have to rebuild immediatly
Tam sure that the systmes in play have stopped years off my life but the characters keep swapping out and no one in the process understands or accept disabilty.
It's a constant cycle of stress an my reward for completing any stage is the deluge of chaos and worry
The established self test for the spectrum of phantasia (ability to visualize with your "mind's eye") is to describe how well you can picture an apple.
- Hyperphantasia (1) is indistinguishable from reality.
- Aphantasia (5) is an inability to picture anything at all.
Some individuals who experience hyperphantasia or near it report being able to superimpose their visualizations over their perception of sight, akin to what is demonstrated in the Iron Man films.
Though it is rarely talked about this phantasia for sight is replaced for every human sense and how well any given person can do it is a spectrum.
Some can listen to music "in their heads"
Some can taste foods "in their heads"
Some can feel textures "in their heads"
etc ...
If you are questioning if you are Autistic and you *need* objective professional third party validation so you can *know* we *highly* recommend you seek out a Neurodiversity Affirming MHP first rather than rushing into attempting to acquire a DX of ASD.
Neurodiversity Affirming Mental Health Professionals embrace that Autism and other intrinsic Neurotypes are healthy and valid and have significantly less stigma towards them and tend to have a much broader and deeper nonpathologized view of Autism (often due to lived experiences)
Neurodiversity Affirming Psychiatrist and Therapists are the ideal but they are costly, limited, and region specific (they can only practices in regions where they are licensed to do so).
ND Affirming Life Coaches address many of these issues.
The sudden and otherwise inexplicable loss of an established skill.
This is potentially a form of dissociation and a trauma response.
It can be one of the symptoms of Autistic Burnout
Autists often have difficult with moderation and knowing when to stop pushing themselves.
One possible interpretation is that in an act of self preservation, a part of your brain stages a coup, goes on strike, and literally denies access to specific skills.
And this theory explains the nature of the weirdness of Autistic Burnout, how you can do some things but *just* *can’t* do others.
Your brain’s defenses are going “*NOPE*, sit your ASS DOWN!” when you push too hard.