i once went down a deep rabbithole out of curiosity to learn more about this lady – her name is Crystal Thierry, she recently-ish turned 40 years old, she strikes me as funny and smart and sort of a proto-egirl from the early 2000s before everything got algo-optimized
she reminds me a bit of Aella in that she would post stuff that was sexy but also goofy, like there's always a bit of this sense of "i am a weird nerd who happens to be in an attractive female body, what do?"
she's from alabama, which i think explains a lot. there's a certain vibe i get from people like this, kind of like "sharper than the small town they're in/from" but more nuanced than that. she reminds me of hayley williams too, in a way
the vibe i get from pics like this is "I know i'm hot, but also i am in bumfuck nowhere, and i want to acknowledge that rather than pretend i'm not"
to offer a comparison, here is a pic of me in front of a garbage dumpster. if i were an attractive woman i'd do what she's doing
this is a more recent picture (she still looks great!!) and the visual vocabulary reminds me of one of my favorite pics from another internet friend, quoted below
imposter syndrome cannot be solved by working harder. because the problem isn't how we feel about ourselves, the problem is that we lack an understanding of the interiority of others.
writer's block cannot be solved by working harder, for similar reasons
the "ptsd used to be called shell-shock" of imposter syndrome is, IMO, that it used to be called an inferiority complex. and no amount of inner work will help you with an inferiority complex because it's a social issue. you can't (purely) inner work your way out of a social issue
writer's block is also a kind of social issue but within the self, in that the writer working harder doesn't change the fact that the inner reader isn't enjoying themselves. its like a marriage where a person is trying to please their spouse in increasingly heated/angry ways
Didn’t get too much sleep last night but I woke up this morning with the thought “I haven’t written yet, I should write”, which is a nice example of both the best and worst thing about me
most of my brain n body would rather go back to bed but there’s like this wild intense spirit-being that moves within me that demands I do work
now this has like maybe a 10% chance of working out
if it does I’ll be happy/satisfied for a week
If it doesn’t I’ll be tired/sad
another part of me is watching on the sidelines like “this whole dynamic is kinda sus, kinda unhealthy, surely there is a better way”
actually now i'm reminded that marshall mcluhan was saying ~60 years ago that artists (implicit: good artists) are the ones who teach us how to live through societal change but hardly anybody is really listening, don't really take them seriously
the pope pius quote (via mcluhan too) also gestures at the same thing. its the integrated man who you want on your team when you are to face times of disintegration
🌀 there's no money in it, die broke and sad
🐉 too much of a good thing kills the love, burnout and self-loathing
⛵️ ayy lmao
i know there are a bunch of relevant comics, i once found a really good one where the guy goes increasingly insane over 3-4 panels about how now everything is work, and his friend is like "maybe... dont do that?" and he's like what? no, i love being an entrepreneur!
been procrastinating for a while now on assembling a doc of notes of things that came up in my consult sessions with my marketing clients... figure i might as well do a twitter thread about it, maybe, just to get moving on it
i'll work in chronological order, backwards from my earlier clients notes, anonymized without details... just gonna list out "things I found myself saying, that was helpful"
1. whats your current idea of what you want out of X? 2. do you have a sense of what your current brand is? how would you describe it? (what's the backstory?) 3. who are some people you'd like to be mutuals with, or that you'd like to work with, be associated with? (why?)