Edwin Hayward Profile picture
Jun 28 2 tweets 1 min read Twitter logo Read on Twitter
Here's how the future is going to play out.

(Long - please expand the tweet.)

1. The Tories will wreck everything at an ever increasing pace as the GE approaches, like irresponsible teenagers who know they're not going to be the ones cleaning up the morning after their wild… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Added: Being PM is maybe a hundred times more important than being Leader of the Opposition, when it comes to securing your place in history. It's one of the few prizes money can't buy (though being rich certainly doesn't hurt your chances). So Starmer may be okish with one term.

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More from @edwinhayward

Jun 26
"Reducing asylum application backlog would make it harder for Rwanda policy to be cost effective, official analysis suggests"

This is a statistic so perverse it should be banned for indecency.

Deep breath, and let's dive in...

Basically the longer an asylum seeker is trapped… https://t.co/nK0iPX2cXEtwitter.com/i/web/status/1…
Here's a (contrived) metaphor for what the Tories are doing.

Imagine you're running a shop, and you're trying to reduce shoplifting.

A Tory comes to you and says "I have the answer. Solid gold robots that run on printer ink at every exit."

"Won't that cost a lot?"

"Well, it… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
And at the cloaca end of the digestive system of hate, you have people like Richard Tice tag-teaming with the Telegraph to stir up threatening division...
https://t.co/FKiO4OaVuCtelegraph.co.uk/news/2023/06/2…
Read 4 tweets
Jun 25
Labour: We're not the Tories.

Yes, but what are you offering?

L: Sorry, don't understand the premise.

What is it that distinguishes you from the Tories.

L: Ah I see. We're not them.

Yes... and?

L: And... and... and... Make Brexit Work!

Phew, was worried for a second there.
Later:

I've been thinking.

Labour: Yes...?

Is that it?

L: What do you mean?

You're not the Tories.

L: Uh-huh.

And you'll Make Brexit Work.

L: You betcha. Like a Swiss watch.

Swiss? Hmm. So you might consider a Swiss model of relationship?

L: Oh, no. No no no no no.
What about other policies?

L: Policies? Nah, don't need 'em.

What?!

L: Look, let me say this slowly, so you'll understand. You can vote for us...

Ok... But why-

L: Shh! Or you can enable the Tories. That's your choice.

But what if I-

L: That's your ONLY choice.
Read 13 tweets
Jun 18
Strap in. It's time to learn how the Tories treat asylum seekers. Warning: This isn't going to be pretty.

Let's take as an example a hotel belonging to Britannia Hotels.

(Note that they were voted the worst hotel chain in the UK for 10 years in a row.)
trafford.gov.uk/planning/devel… Image
Let's go through this step by step.

The hotel isn't being contracted by the government, but by Serco. So they will put a (likely hefty) markup on the transaction.

The hotel in question has 67 rooms, but 112 "bedspaces". It expects to receive "predominantly single adult males". Image
Asylum seekers (who are NOT allowed to work, remember) get:
- 3 meals a day
- £9 a week
- Free laundry (but no clothing)
- Er, that's it

It is claimed they won't be noisy or cause trouble because they will only have "limited means at their disposal to venture out". Image
Read 9 tweets
Jun 18
"Hotel mogul dubbed ‘Asylum King’ enjoys record profits as Braverman grapples with migrant backlog"

The Tories picked a chain voted worst in the UK for 10 years in a row and poured cash at it.

(You can bet asylum seekers aren't getting hotel conditions!)
telegraph.co.uk/business/2023/… Image
This is far from a one-off. Here's a story from 2014 that will sound awfully familiar...
dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2… Image
And of course...

"Its Chief Executive, founder, and largest shareholder remains Alex Langsam. Langsam is a non-domiciled taxpayer, registered as living in Austria for tax-purposes since 1999."

One wouldn't have expected anything else.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Britannia…
Read 4 tweets
Jun 17
"UK delis could be forced to put up prices after new Brexit tax

Plan to charge £43 per consignment could see some small businesses struggle to stay open"

Because it's per consignment, shops that import small amounts of lots of things pay lots of times... theguardian.com/politics/2023/…
There's a lot more complexity being introduced than just the inspection fee...

Many types of product (milk, dairy, eggs etc.) will now need a health certificate issued before travel.

Again, this will make imports much more expensive - or impossible.
gov.uk/government/pub… Image
Suddenly you need specialists. And customs specialists are rarer than diamonds, and can charge accordingly.

So you have new fees, new processes, new certificates, new documents, new red tape, and new people inserted in the supply chains.

Prices will explode and choices plummet.
Read 5 tweets
Jun 16
This is the same Tory government that is cutting corners left and right while the cost of living crisis bites deep, and yet they're casually spaffing £1.6 billion up the wall on a bare handful of barges.
independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-n… Image
Context: a business hotel with 120+ rooms near Heathrow is on the market for £26 million.

The contract for the barges would purchase 61 such hotels outright.
uk.businessesforsale.com/uk/superior-4-…
Or how about this 57 bed hotel in Paddington?

Remember, the first barge the government acquired has just 222 rooms.

We're nearly there for a spend of under £40 million, 40x less than the contract.
christie.com/4241256 Image
Read 6 tweets

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