Thread by @iyad_elbaghdadi

Good afternoon (or morning, or evening). I went dark yesterday, really dark. But I managed to sleep and I have some clarity about the Al Ahli hospital massacre that I want to share with you. I'll only tweet this rambling thread today and then log off. Please read and share.

I want to first thank everyone who checked on me. A Palestinian friend thanked me for openly saying that I'm struggling, she sounded like she's struggling even more than me. Remember, it's okay not to be okay. It's okay to reach out for help. There's a lot of love out there.

I also want to say that our grief and our deep triggers aren't because of any single incident. We are a nation of refugees, survivors of erasure, of relentless violence. We carry not only our own wounds but the wounds of our ancestors. All of our wounds are open and bleeding now.

For 10 days we've been hearing openly genocidal statements fully supported and sometimes even endorsed by Western leaders, leaders who are supposed to stand up for "democracy", "human rights", etc. But not only for 10 days. This has been our entire lives. This has been 75 years.

I also want to say that even in the deepest darkness of my anguish and my triggers I did not desire revenge. Not even a little bit. I didn't want anyone hurt to quench my pain. All I want in the moment was for our lives to be protected and our humanity to be acknowledged.

I also want to say that I hold Jewish life to be as sacred as Palestinian life. This is a truth for which I live and for which I'll die if necessary. This isn't a slogan, it's an article of faith that I believe as deeply and passionately as I believe that there is no god but God.

I want to acknowledge anger and rage at how the news about the hospital propagated. But this isn't another "proof" type thread. I want you to understand the *psychology* of this, and why at this point, this is no longer a problem of which facts are true or false. We're past that.

It's important to understand that we were primed to expect bloody massacres. For 10 days there's been a long list of genocidal statements, clearly saying that everyone is a target, there are no civilian vs combatant distinction, hospitals aren't safe, and vengeance will be severe

All of this was in our psyche *before* the news broke. That's why when the frantic news came (I got it by whatsapp first) we were already primed to believe it. Because we were long expecting a bloodbath and every single second was a worse nightmare, wishing the worst won't happen

This explains the virality of the news. What actually happened? There are lots of threads offering educated & uneducated guesses both ways and I'll ignore all of them. There are few journalists on the ground. And we know there won't be an independent investigation anytime soon.

But we're past the point where the facts matter. Listen to Jordan's FM explain why. Most Arabs & Muslims already formed an opinion based on a long history of Israeli brutality, disregard for human life, public lies, disinformation, and Western support.

https://twitter.com/painekillerxxl/status/1714930752024904176

This is no longer about a specific hospital and what happened there. The news were a watershed moment for a lot of pent up anger about a million things, bottled up for a long time, to explode. Confirming or debunking won't help. This is no longer about facts but about psychology

For now this anger is about Palestine. But the reason why Arab governments are so scared right now is because pent up anger, when it comes out, just brings forth all other grievances. Many protesters are already criticizing their own governments. This can still massively escalate

And I must say that even pro-Israel people need to question Israel's media strategy. Reckless statements, a long history of brutality, and reliance on disinformation has primed a large proportion of the world to fully expect Israel to commit massacres and then lie about them

Now. Every friend I talk to is deeply triggered. For Palestinians the triggers are intergenerational. We grew up seeing our people getting blown up or humiliated or subjugated or shot or beaten. Our parents grew up with that. Our grandparents. All of our trauma is exploding.

Our brethren are equally triggered. The scenes of body parts and mangled babies reminds of what Syrians, Iraqis, Lebanese, Yemenis, Kurds, Afghans, and others have seen for years. The humiliation, double standards, silence, and shame triggers everyone across much of the world

Remember that we're not wise when we're triggered. Remember that this horror isn't going to end anytime soon. Remember that our work and energy and voices are needed now and tomorrow. Remember that it's okay to not be okay, it's okay to say "I need help".

I was really struggling yesterday. Thankfully there were people who caught me when I fell. Today and tomorrow I want to be that to others. I'm going to log off today and perhaps also tomorrow and just reach out to people who are struggling. I'm here if you need to talk.

And please, please, please, don't forget our Jewish sisters and brothers (thread from earlier here). Check on them too. Some of the people who checked on me first were Jewish people. They're also not okay. Send them some love.

https://twitter.com/ShusterNoam/status/1714561105899426034

And please share this. Regardless what anyone thinks, nobody will exterminate anybody. When this is all over, be it in 20, 50, or 100 years, there will be Jews and Palestinians - our children - living in the Holy Land. May it be in peace, love & equality.

https://twitter.com/iyad_elbaghdadi/status/1713236580914041300