Post

More from @SirKazamJeevi

SirKazam {blu tik}

@SirKazamJeevi

Jul 19

Wknd 🧵- In His Glory 🙏

जुमलेबाज, चुनावी कलाबाज़,
रडारभेदी, बेनिफिट टूएबी,
सत्याग्रही, सदैव सही,
मोर प्रेम अपार, विष्णु अवतार,
कैमरादर्शी, टोंटी फौट्टी सेविन दूरदर्शी,
नाला गैस निर्माता, अरबी बादशाह भ्राता,
दाढ़ी युक्त, लज्जा मुक्त,
चर्चाखोर, क्रेडिट चोर,…

1/7

…गुफा ध्यानी, परीक्षा ज्ञानी,
उत्सव प्रधान, छप्पन ईंची नक़ली बलवान,
असत्यवादी, सड़कछाप उन्मादी,
भाषणवीर, शाही फ़क़ीर,
पेगासस जासूसी सम्राट, 56 इंच तोंद विराट
विस्ता निर्माता, सर्वज्ञान ज्ञाता,
किसान बिल पीड़ित, मंकी बात उत्पीड़ित,
शरदी विशेषज्ञ, एक्स्ट्रा टूएबी गणितज्ञ,…

2/7

..होर्नी बल शाली, भाषा से मवाली,
चोर चौकीदार, ए वन ए टू वफ़ादार,
टेलीप्रोम्पटर भोगी, प्रेस कॉन्फ़्रेंस वियोगी,
डोलाँड मित्र, वेशभूषा विचित्र,
चीता प्रेमी, फ़ीता कृमि,
उद्घाटन पसंद, हरी झंडी मलंग,
टानिक ड्रिंकर, लाल आँख थिंकर,
वैक्सीन आविष्कारी, एन्टायर डिग्री धारी,…

3/7

Read 8 tweets

SirKazam {blu tik}

@SirKazamJeevi

Jun 21

Wknd 🧵- Modi Quotes in Movies

I hear censor board asked a producer to include Modi’s quote in his movie. I wish this was done earlier; so many movies could’ve used these great Modi quotes 😇:

1/20
Moye Mil Gaya

2/20

LotusPata Ladies

3/20

37% Idiots

Read 20 tweets

SirKazam {blu tik}

@SirKazamJeevi

Jun 18

Big Breaking 🔥- The Phone Call
(read till end for phull beniphit 😅)

Helloo my phrend how are you
-I am good, great actually, so good. I am doing the best, I always do , everyone says so, like no one ever did as great as I do, it’s unbelievable.. what do you want? are you…
+

…calling to thank me for ceasefire? I think you should, you should be grateful actually…

My phrend why are you hoomilating me in public
-I saved your sorry ass, but you are being very mean to me. so mean. Everybody told me not to be nice to you , but I was so nice, always…
+

…and you are always mean to me, never thank me. So bad, totally unacceptable

No no, I naver said you not nice to me. But pliz don’t say so open lee to take craadit phor seej phire
-You don’t have the cards, I am SORRY to say that but you don’t have any cards. I have them..
+

Read 14 tweets

SirKazam {blu tik}

@SirKazamJeevi

May 31

Dear Modi Ji, aap kitna bhi Sindoor Sindoor khel lo, lekin ye to aap ko batana hi padega ki:
-Why there was no security at a popular tourist stop in Pahalgam?
-Why did help not arrive for 30 mins after the terrorists opened fire?
-Why haven’t the home ministry still found any…
+

.. intelligence to arrest the terrorists?
-Why did you agree for a ceasefire when our forces were dominating over Pakistan?
-US President has repeatedly claimed he forced you to agree for cease fire. Why haven’t you called his lies out in public?
-Why did you fail to stop…
+

..Pakistan’s IMF loan?
-Why couldn’t you manage to convince even one country to express dissent at IMF meeting?
-Why haven’t you been able to get even one major country to publicly condemn Pakistan for Pahalgam terror attacks?
-Why haven’t you called out a joint Parliament….
+

Read 4 tweets

SirKazam {blu tik}

@SirKazamJeevi

Mar 23

Special🧵- Bhagat Singh, March23

On this day, he moved on to a better place but his ideas live on

Read what he stood for & you realise if he was alive today, he would’ve started a revolution against this very regime who so shamelessly try to appropriate his legacy!
1/20

2/20

3/20

Read 20 tweets

SirKazam {blu tik}

@SirKazamJeevi

Mar 22

Wknd🧵Indian Media-Hall of (no)Shame

Our media needs no introduction in making a mockery of Journalism but some acts have achieved legendary status. Here goes:

1/13
Starting with Cacophony King, always very Calm, Arnab Goswami making a point about Rhea Chkravarti

2/13
Media circus about Rhea Chakravarti set many journalism lows but this one by Pradeep Bhandari was buffoonery par excellence! Mr Bhandari is now a spokesperson of BJP. I guess BJP has a thing for spotting talent