If you hated #TheWeekInTory, you’ll hate this even more. It’s #14YearsInTory, and every day I’m covering one PM. A separate thread for each year in office.
This is Part Four of David Cameron ...
This is Part Four of David Cameron ...
1. Waxed polyp David Cameron did a mid-term review in which he boasted “The economy is balancing”
2. Our national debt had grown from 62% to 79% of GDP, and 2.5 million were unemployed
2. Our national debt had grown from 62% to 79% of GDP, and 2.5 million were unemployed
3. Average workers earned the same in 2013 as they had in 2003, wiping out a decade of pay rises
4. Rail fares rose
5. Since privatisation, public subsidies of rail had tripled, ticket prices increased 66%, and Virgin had paid half a billion of your money to their shareholders
4. Rail fares rose
5. Since privatisation, public subsidies of rail had tripled, ticket prices increased 66%, and Virgin had paid half a billion of your money to their shareholders
6. As part of a “bonfire of red tape”, Tories cut food inspections by 70%
7. Almost immediately we had the Horse Meat scandal
8. It wasn’t just about Dobbin in your lasagne. Beef standards fell so low that abattoir workers reported handling “green” and “putrid” meat.
7. Almost immediately we had the Horse Meat scandal
8. It wasn’t just about Dobbin in your lasagne. Beef standards fell so low that abattoir workers reported handling “green” and “putrid” meat.
9. This resulted in hard-line Eurosceptic and future former Tory Owen Paterson, the environment minister, taking a private plane to the Hague to insist “it’s clear that the EU is the right organisation” to fix his basic shit for him
10. Osborne listed things “against which you will be able to judge” the govt, one of which was “we will maintain Britain’s AAA credit rating”
11. We lost our AAA credit rating
12. He insisted this was temporary
13. In Dec the rating fell again to AA Negative
11. We lost our AAA credit rating
12. He insisted this was temporary
13. In Dec the rating fell again to AA Negative
14. Something rather more fun: the location the Tories chose to launch 5p charges for plastic bags was a dogging site
15. But you could still get absolutely fucked by strangers in your own home, as they introduced the Spare Room Tax
15. But you could still get absolutely fucked by strangers in your own home, as they introduced the Spare Room Tax
16. This was intended to free up space by forcing people into smaller homes
17. 96% of people affected had nowhere to go, cos no smaller homes existed
18. Chris Grayling was back, as the first non-lawyer to be Lord Chancellor in our history
17. 96% of people affected had nowhere to go, cos no smaller homes existed
18. Chris Grayling was back, as the first non-lawyer to be Lord Chancellor in our history
19. I can find no evidence of Chris Grayling having ever been hapful, gormful, reckful or ept
20. He introduced cuts to legal aid which left 113,000 litigants a year without legal representation
21. He reduced people eligible for legal aid from 91,000 to 478. That’s not a typo
20. He introduced cuts to legal aid which left 113,000 litigants a year without legal representation
21. He reduced people eligible for legal aid from 91,000 to 478. That’s not a typo
22. He sold off £223 million of court buildings
23. He banned books in prisons
24. All of this was supposed to cut costs
24. Costs actually ended up coming in £467 million higher
23. He banned books in prisons
24. All of this was supposed to cut costs
24. Costs actually ended up coming in £467 million higher
25. Nigel Evans voted for this, and then had the nerve to say “It’s wrong, completely wrong, to remove people’s right to have expert legal representation” when he lost his life savings defending himself against (disproven) rape charges
26. And that’s how the “party of law and order” left us with a record 398-day wait for a court appearance
27. Speaking of which, Patrick Mercer was caught offering to take £4,000 to influence parliamentary process
27. Speaking of which, Patrick Mercer was caught offering to take £4,000 to influence parliamentary process
28. Here are some of his statements (with my apologies)
29. “You don’t look like a soldier to me, you look like a bloody Jew”
30. Ethnic minority soldiers are “idle and useless”
31. Ethnic minorities should expect to be called “black bastard” or “ni**er”
29. “You don’t look like a soldier to me, you look like a bloody Jew”
30. Ethnic minority soldiers are “idle and useless”
31. Ethnic minorities should expect to be called “black bastard” or “ni**er”
32. Grant Shapps told LBC, “Let me get this absolutely clear. I don’t have a second job. And I have never had a second job while being an MP. End of story”
33. He had a second job.
33. He had a second job.
34. And he also had at least four secret personas.
35. In fact he had more identities than Jason Bourne, somebody else who people would travel halfway around the world just to punch
35. In fact he had more identities than Jason Bourne, somebody else who people would travel halfway around the world just to punch
36. Despite promises to increase NHS money, the UK Stats Authority confirmed “expenditure on the NHS in real terms is lower”
37. Owen Paterson learned from his mistakes, so he could make them even better next time: he wasted another £7m on not killing badgers
37. Owen Paterson learned from his mistakes, so he could make them even better next time: he wasted another £7m on not killing badgers
38. The Tories then made the public take on £40bn of Royal Mail debt, while they sold the company to their friends in the City for £2bn less than it was worth
39. Total cost to you and me: £42 billion
40. Then they sold £890m of student debt for £160 million
39. Total cost to you and me: £42 billion
40. Then they sold £890m of student debt for £160 million
41. Summary
- State debt: 79% (up 3% on previous year)
- Foodbank users: 346,000 (up 170%)
- NHS waiting: 2.9 m (up 11%)
- Children in poverty: 3.7 m (up 0.3%)
- Billionaires: £240 billion (up 8%)
- State debt: 79% (up 3% on previous year)
- Foodbank users: 346,000 (up 170%)
- NHS waiting: 2.9 m (up 11%)
- Children in poverty: 3.7 m (up 0.3%)
- Billionaires: £240 billion (up 8%)
There is one of these threads for each year since 2010 (look for the hashtag #14YearsInTory).
And more coming over the coming days.
Please back my forthcoming book “Tories: The End of an Error”, due ASAP after the election. Ta very much!
unbound.com/books/tories-e…
And more coming over the coming days.
Please back my forthcoming book “Tories: The End of an Error”, due ASAP after the election. Ta very much!
unbound.com/books/tories-e…
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