Since The Motherland has been banned from the #Olympics2024Paris, #Cubie has decided to host his own Olympic games based on Russian specialty events!
Come along and see the prowess of the Motherland's finest!
#CubieGames2024 1/
First up is the drone evasion event!
Basically it's an obstacle course where competitors have to not only complete the obstacle course, but also not get Merc'd by FPV Drones. What a delight!
#CubieGames2024 2/
Second up, we have the Motorcycle Rally!
Here again, it's a motorcycle race, all while being chased by FPV Drones intent on making more #Cubie's!
#CubieGames2024 3/
Thirdly, we have the not dying of dysentery event.
This is more of a lowkey event, but will really show the physical fortitude of all the participants!
#CubieGames2024 4/
Fifthly, we have an event solely for officers.
This event mainly focuses on the mental prowess of Russian officers, to lie about their battlefield progress, all the while embezzling money from the Military before getting caught.
#CubieGames2024 5/
Sixthly we have the ever popular distance jump.
Competitors wait for their vehicle to be blown up and attempt to get the longest toss! Scoring includes a style component based on the grace of the competitor in mid air and the landing.
#CubieGames2024 6/
Seventh, we have the battlefield suicide event.
Competitors need to show creativity and style in order to get a hole in one in this event ;) Musical accompaniment is allowed but not mandatory!
#CubieGames2024 7/
The Eighth event is the mine detection event.
Pretty straight concept. Survivor wins.
#CubieGames2024 8/
Finally but not least-ly, we have the Black Sea Fleet event.
Basically the competitors have to outrun the RC suicide boats as long as possible. Longest time before getting caught wins.
#CubieGames2024 9/
Thus concludes the #CubieGames2024 events lineup! The Motherland cares not if the world looks towards Paris in the coming weeks. She knows that Russia is better than everyone at everything!
/FIN
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#Cubie the Intelligence officer MEGATHREAD adventure starts here 1/
#Cubie began life is a typical Russian household. His parents were not around much, so #Cubie watched a LOT of television. Such great messaging from the Motherland! 2/
#Cubie was a bit of a sickly child. Not one for the outdoors. So #Cubie was raised on Russian television. He admired all the characters on there and drank in the wonderful stories! 3/
For all those that didn't catch #Cubies adventure to Alaska, here is the thread!
#Cubie will be right back. The Motherland has rightfully decreed that the cynical Americans illegally purchased Alaska over 100 years ago. #Cubie has been tasked with going to get it back. #Cubie thinks that this should be easier than the SMO. The Motherland Provides! /1
On #Cubie's special mission to regain Alaska for the Motherland, he encountered a local American. #Cubie was warned about Bears, but this isn't what #Cubie was expecting. /2
#Cubie received the best education that the Motherland can provide. One area those pig dog Westerners always look down on Russia for is Russian Art. #Cubie is here to tell you the truth about Russian Art history. We can find #Cubie's throughout history. 1/
Western Art historians have covered up that the Motherland has been represented as far back as ancient Egypt! 2/
#Cubie was told that the Greek philosophers were in awe of the Russian mind! 3/
#Cubie was born in a typical Russian village. The Motherland has provided nothing but the best for its people. Here we can see #Cubie’s mother. She is working. 2/
Here we see #Cubie’s father. The cream of the Motherland! Don’t worry dear reader, this is the only time you will see him. 3/