As I've split my Russian cities "travel guide" into a myriad of different threads and posts, I've decided to finally gather them all in one place (mostly so I can have something to pin on my profile).
Welcome to "Posh Russian cities - The Definitive Edition" 🧵
While a romantic sunset, sunrise or the sun in general is not something you're likely to experience in Norilsk - a city that fields a beautiful bi-annual Biblical plague when the local river runs red with pollution, is one for sure bound to go straight to your heart. And lungs.
Having "Leave" as the most common answer to the "Things to do in..." question, Magnitogorsk's mix of local dishes is widely recommended as an excellent way to encourage hair loss, while a dip in the local river is equally advised to those looking to possibly acquire superpowers.
Famous world-wide for having its acclaimed post-apocalyptic urban scenery depicted in various TV shows, and more recently for having God attempt to whack it with an asteroid, Chelyabinsk is guaranteed to give you the zombie apocalypse experience you always dreamt of.
Sporting several new strains of hepatitis and a very diverse ethnic mix, Chita's public sanitation system and the city's vast array of culinary delights are guaranteed to take dysentery to a whole new level and make for a truly incurable experience you will not easily forget.
Magadan, sometimes affectionately refereed to by its residents as "the place I dream of leaving", managed to reinvent the concept of urban infrastructure and, not being one to let the lack of cars or residents stand in the way, fields internationally acclaimed traffic jams.
Appetizingly known as "the cold corner of hell" and having a very deep hole in ground as it's main attraction, Murmansk is beloved to all for it's very sober and mild-mannered residents, which are bound to rob of sympathy any traveler that comes their way.
With "My town and destiny" as its motto and often described as a "breath of fresh air" by its 70k proud inhabitants, the city of Asbest, possibly named after the absolutely gigantic open-air asbestos mine sitting right in the middle of it, is guaranteed to take your breath away.
With its 200k inhabitants enjoying a life expectancy of 42 and having "life may be bad but at least it's short" as the unofficial motto, Dzerzhinsk is a must among worldwide chemical weapons enthusiasts, with popular tourist hotspots such as "The White Sea" and the "Black hole".
Sporting an exquisite smog bound to satisfy even the most pretentious of the coal enthusiasts out there, Vorkuta prides itself in a rich history of forced labor, crimes against humanity and a perfectly conserved 1930s vintage sewage system.
With over a million potholes, about as many people trying to get out and enough mud to cover everyone's needs, Omsk operates a one-station metro system which, while allowing for instantaneous arrivals and departures, will rather symbolically take you absolutely nowhere.
With a high GDP per capita by Russian standards, the perpetually flooded city of Syktyvkar is the place where Putin's party once won by campaigning on the - yet undelivered - "a pallet for every puddle" promise, having correctly identified that as the only sensible solution.
Fielding a remarkable number of Buddhist temples and a devoutly homicidal population that make the former rather pointless, the enticingly friendly Kyzyl prides itself in being occasionally safer than your average warzone while having a roughly similar standard of living.
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The typical reply to this question appears to be "because America is big", which is a disarmingly stupid answer, given nobody is asking you to protest in the opposite corner of your country.
The population of New York City alone is some 25% bigger than that of Serbia. Yesterday, hundreds of thousands of Serbs took to the streets in Belgrade, a city of less than 2 million.
How many people out of New York City's 8 million took to the streets of New York City, not some far away place, in protest against Trump?
Likewise, another common answer appears to be "he'll impose martial law if we protest in large numbers".
Unlikely, but lets assume he'd do that. What is the plan then, never protest out of fear that might happen? Cause the more you wait, the more likely that scenario gets.
The other popular plan appears to be "we'll beat them in the mid terms" and "the courts will stop him".
Sorry to break it to you, but the man that chose to besiege the US Capitol instead of recognizing an election loss, won't care much for court decisions or free elections.
Because boycotting American products is the very least we regular Europeans can do right now to return the favor, here's a thread of US brands to avoid, split up by category for your convenience.🧵
With the USA on the verge of turning into everyone's least favorite banana republic and for the sake of giving MAGA a taste of things to come, I figured it's time to take a look at Turkmenistan and their eternal dear leader, one with a striking set of similarities to Trump. 🧵
Every bit as passionate as Trump when it comes to renaming things, the Turkmen dictator eventually went all the way and decided to rename the months of the year and days of the week after his family and friends. Very much loving his mom, he also renamed "bread" after her.
Much like Musk's DOGE, in a bid to create new institutions meant to deal with the most pressing matters of the day, the Turkmen dictator came up with a very well funded Ministry of the Carpets, following what can only be assumed was a thorough brainstorming session.
Seeing how the USA now hellbent on emulating their newfound ally of Russia, both at home and abroad, I find myself obliged to repost my dive into Russia's posh cities, just to give your average MAGA a glimpse into the greatness Trump is sure to bring about! Do enjoy!🧵
While a romantic sunset, sunrise or the sun in general is not something you're likely to experience in Norilsk - a city that fields a beautiful bi-annual Biblical plague when the local river runs red with pollution, is one for sure bound to go straight to your heart. And lungs.
Having "Leave" as the most common answer to the "Things to do in..." question, Magnitogorsk's mix of local dishes is widely recommended as an excellent way to encourage hair loss, while a dip in the local river is equally advised to those looking to possibly acquire superpowers.
For the sake of making myself as unlikable as possible with the MAGA community, to whatever extent MAGA is still a thing or a community right now, I've decided to do a short thread tackling the most common misconceptions they seem to have about Europe.🧵
No matter how hard you'd try it, and plenty of MAGA seem to be engaging in the task, you can't fit Europe into Texas. In fact, you can't even fit it into all of the US! Believe it or not, and I'm guessing not, Europe's 10.5 million sq km are more than USA's 9.8 million sq km!
Now I'm absolutely convinced that polio connoisseur and roadkill chef of a Secretary of Health you guys now have will do wonders, but until he does, the US currently ranks slightly below Albania in terms of life expectancy, and Albania ranks rather bad at it among us Europeans.