It was reading personal stories and finding myself weeping that I realized I was in an abusive marriage. So, with that knowledge, I share my personal stories to help others.
With that said, I will share another story:
With that said, I will share another story:
Early in our marriage, we had arguments that went late into the night (don't let the sun go down on your anger). When I brought up an issue, he never seemed to fully get it. I tried to explain, paraphrase, over and over again to gain understanding. It was always put back on me.
After hours of this and no resolution, I got upset because he wasn't getting it. I didn't know if it was intentional, but it was so frustrating, and unfortunately, I got angry.
He then confronted me about my anger. This led me to feel great remorse for my behavior, and eventually, I was in tears apologizing for my anger. The original issue I had was never resolved. But . . . he was now satisfied.
It took decades for me to realize that no conflict ever was resolved.
Shortly before our divorce, he said to me that he missed the "old Julie Anne" - the one who realized her error, cried, and apologized for her sin.
Shortly before our divorce, he said to me that he missed the "old Julie Anne" - the one who realized her error, cried, and apologized for her sin.
By that time, I knew the pattern: he was never wrong, he never accepted responsibility for anything, and I was always to blame.
Ladies, if this describes your marriage, you are in an emotionally abusive marriage. I recommend the book by Natalie Hoffman, "Is it Me?"
Ladies, if this describes your marriage, you are in an emotionally abusive marriage. I recommend the book by Natalie Hoffman, "Is it Me?"
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