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Johnny Profane Âû Profile picture
@johnnyprofane1
Mar 19 • 7 tweets • 2 min read • Read on X
I just want to put this out there. My autistic experience. Maybe no one else's.

For awhile? I was misdiagnosed bipolar II. Which led to unfortunate meds… and side effects. Permanent.

#ActuallyAutistic #ADHD #Bipolar

🧵1/ Profile silhouette of a person wearing a fedora hat against a black background. Multiple overlapping profiles extend behind the main figure, creating a visual echo effect. Dramatic lighting highlights only the edges of each profile. The repetition and shadowing suggest different states of being or cognition, visually representing the variable cognitive experiences described in the post about autism and misdiagnosis.
See… I tested with a gifted IQ. But because of my spiky cognitive profile? I definitely perform at a subnormal level.

Here’s the deal…

During periods of clarity, I can indeed do some things that amaze me. I founded and ran an award-winning magazine at 30.

2/
But when I was young, I could typically be “brilliant” for 3 to 6 months before I crashed. Definitely NOT your typical bipolar profile.

But they handed me lithium, depakote, carbamazepine, one desperate toxic substance after another....

3/
Til I walked… ticcing, blurting obscenities, and dragging one foot… away.

Truth? As far as I choose to believe?

I’m bright. In the right environment. Which will never include a desk, cubicle, and clever coffee cup...

4/
Cuz burnouts erase more than 70 years of knowledge and experience.

Every time. Since 2nd grade. If degrading memory… & cognition… serves.

My understanding. Of my memory.

I live in awe of folks who live with bipolarity AND autism. No reflection on your struggles.

5/
Please bear in mind. Just the lived experience of one old...

#ActuallyAutistic

I’m eager to hear about yours if you comment.

6/6
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More from @johnnyprofane1

Johnny Profane Âû Profile picture
Mar 18
an autistic meltdown is fight flight freeze & appease all at once.

even when it comes out as "fuck You fuck You fuck you."

it's a tiger seagull deer cringing dog all smashed into the same moment. like if a qubit could scream.

1/2
despite my spiritual ... pretensions... this has been my truth. sunce 1953.

My mileage may vary.

2/2
In the end? Tiger usually wins.

Lives to regret it the rest of his fucking life.

3/2
Read 4 tweets
Johnny Profane Âû Profile picture
Mar 12
I'm an autistic writer and podcaster. I chose the "stage name" of Johnny Profane Âû.

why? I wanted to say what I really needed to say... without masking.

#ActuallyAutistic #Neurodivergent #ADHD

1/ Abstract black and white sketch with chaotic, intersecting lines creating a sense of movement and transition. Two circular forms emerge from the turbulence - one dark, one lighter. The spontaneous ballpoint pen technique evokes automatic drawing practices of surrealists, capturing raw emotional states. The unplanned, immediate response mirrors the author's journey from masked expression to authenticity, visually representing the "bardo" state between personas. The circular elements suggest wholeness emerging from chaos, complementing the narrative of finding a true voice.
ironically I couldn't begin to do that without the fig leaf of internal cosplay.

i wasn't saying these things. Johnny Profane was.

cool thing? in time i wasn't listening to him any more

i was listening to me. then just speaking the truth.

2/
cool. right? i didn't see that coming.

but ya know, coolest thing... yet?

i began seeing the world around me with different eyes too. not thru a mask. not even an ironic one.

maybe? seeing it more as it is.

3/
Read 7 tweets
Johnny Profane Âû Profile picture
Mar 10
We sure blew past that goal! On Day $4!

Thanks to
Bernard Grant,
David Perlmutter,
Tony V in LV,
LivingWithHarmony,
Sam Farmer,
Ian Lawton,
Eric,
Krishna Sadhana,
Kara Mace!

I hope you can forgive me... I'm leaving the 7-day fund raiser up.

Here's why:

#ActuallyAutistic
1/ At left, banner on grafitti sign reads, "AutisticAF Out Loud. On Voice. Raw. Real. Fiercely Neurodivergent." At right, text reads, "Day 3, $210.55, 140% of Goal!, Raised toward $150 Goal. Check back tomorrow... for progress."
I'm thinking of adding something. More sponstaneous. Letting me post more often. I could use a few nickles in my pocket to help make it happen.

A new podcast:
"Trigger Warnings: Fiercely 'Divergent News." A sort of "Gimme 10 minutes? I'll give you my neurodivergent world."

2/
Cover one pressing story each episode in some depth... from a broader perspective, like politics or world geopolitics... with an autistic eye.

Plus quick headlines on neurodivergent research, institutional abuse, significant intiatives.

3/
Read 5 tweets
Johnny Profane Âû Profile picture
Mar 7
I believe no one should have to pay to be autistic.
That's why all my resources on living Neurodivergent... out loud? Always free.

But at 70-something, on govt assistance, I need help.
7-day fundraiser: $150 & keep this work going.


#ActuallyAutistic 1/7 ko-fi.com/autisticaf
Just in February 2025 alone, I talked directly with:

17 newly diagnosed #autistic adults
11 families raising #neurodivergent kids
12 therapists & caregivers
7 researchers
3 teachers

Hundreds reach out to me yearly.

THEN, the tens of thousands who read/listen. Silently.

2/7
With inflation and cuts to my government housing, medical, & food subsidies, I'm in crisis mode. The $150 I need covers Internet and other modest but critical expenses to continue creating content.

#Neurodiversity #MentalHealth #Psychology #DisabilityJusticeNow

3/7
Read 8 tweets
Johnny Profane Âû Profile picture
Feb 23
@perplexity_ai? Most useful AI app I've used to date… & keeps improving at a fast rate.

Deep research,
brainstorming creative writing,
editing,
research,
project organizing via Spaces,
AI assistant to keep me on track,
+ instant search for tech support or any casual thing.
Perplexity offers a whole lotta executive functioning help for this #autistic + #ADHD.
Wish they were active on Bluesky or Mastodon. But I follow them on X...

For a little while longer. I'll be leaving the platform in some weeks.
Read 4 tweets
Johnny Profane Âû Profile picture
Feb 22
I'm #autistic. I've re-read the Dune series... maybe a dozen times since 1965.

How about you?

Are you #Neurodivergent? Do you re-experience your faves?

#AskingAutistics

1/2
I love re-reading. LOVE it.

I relive memories. I'm back in the moment. Like that, I re-experience the depth of emotion, insight, beauty each re-visit of a book or movie.

It becomes a deeply nuanced experience. Layers of feeling & sensations from various ages I re-read.

2/2
Hey thanks @nowmama1 ... Say. You got any topics you want me to cover?
Read 5 tweets

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