Thread by @ReporterTired

I don’t know if many English-speaking people read my account, but it’s worth a try. After nights like this one, I feel the need to explain a little what it's like: living in Kyiv during a full-scale war 👇

Caught myself thinking that I barely remember the time before the war. And I’m not talking about 2022, but about 2014. The war has been close one way or another all this time: funerals, hospitals, friends, fundraisers, work on the frontline, news from the occupied territories 👇

And only a completely unempathetic fool can claim the war is far away and doesn’t really concern them (though yes, such people do exist). In case you missed it: the war in Ukraine started in 2014, when the Russians occupied Crimea 👇

And this is also an important reminder, because sometimes I’ve had to hear bullshit like: “Well, that was a long time ago, what’s the difference now.” A huge difference. Because occupied territories remain occupied even decades later 👇

And since 2022, Russia stopped pretending altogether and decided to wage a full-scale war. So here you are, living in the capital of a country whose right to exist Russians completely reject, and whose entire people’s existence they deny 👇

For the past three years, I’ve spent many nights sleeping in the bathroom. Because that puts at least two walls between me and the street. They’re thick, made of concrete and brick, and I naively hope they’ll protect me from shrapnel if there’s an explosion nearby 👇

I don’t even think about what would happen if a drone flew straight into window. I mean, it’s a sort of fatalism. Because in the case of a direct hit, there are too many factors you can’t predict. And if you can’t predict something—you try not to think about it 👇

So, I think I’ve already written here that every night I prepare two beds: a regular one in the bedroom, and one in the bathroom, made of several sleeping pads and sleeping bags. Before going to sleep, you checking the air raid map and make a decision 👇

Will you start the night in a normal bed, or is it better to go straight to the bathroom, so you don’t end up running around the apartment in the middle of the night. You also bring your go-bag into the bathroom—with tech, documents, a first aid kit, and a flashlight 👇

So that if something happens, everything is within reach. Sometimes, if you don’t forget, you also bring a bottle of water. Since I’m tall, sleeping in the bathroom isn’t very comfortable—despite its size, I still don’t fit on the floor) 👇

You also learn to predict the attacks. For example, if Russians attacked neighboring regions—like Poltava or Cherkasy—for several nights in a row, that means you should expect an attack on Kyiv soon 👇

It’s easy to tell when the drones are headed for Kyiv. If they are, they arrive early, while it’s still light out, and can come not just from the Sumy region, but also from Chernihiv. If you see that happening, you head straight to sleep in the bathroom 👇

If the drones are only flying from the Sumy region, there’s a chance they’ll target somewhere else that night, and you might be able to sleep in a normal bed without interruption. But not always—there are different scenarios 👇

Because just before dawn, you might jolt awake because ballistic missiles are flying toward Kyiv. Sometimes the air raid alert goes off at the same moment as the explosions, or just a minute or two before the strike. There’s no time to get to a shelter. Only the bathroom 👇

And if you spend the whole night in the bathroom—it’s hard to call that real sleep. Your joints ache, no matter how many sleeping pads you lay down—the floor is never going to feel like a bed. And because of that damn joint pain, you can’t fall asleep 👇

But that’s not even the worst part. Because aching joints are the least of your worries. When your windows rattle and your doors slam because something gets shot down nearby—it’s pretty hard to sleep. And if it's a ballistic missile—the whole city hears it 👇

Or you might wake up to a horrible buzzing right over your building. That’s a modified Iranian Shahed drone, which of course no one ever officially supplied to the Russians. And trust me—that’s not a sound you ever want to hear 👇

On nights like tonight, the number of these drones can reach the hundreds. Literally. And the monitoring channels even stop reporting which districts they’re flying over and how many—because there’s just no point. This shit is everywhere 👇

And then the reports start coming in about impacts. And every time, they’re somewhere near your friends or family. Because I have friends all over Kyiv. So you start messaging them, asking if they’re okay. And you get nervous when they take too long to reply 👇

By morning, the air raid alert is over. And all in all, you got maybe three hours of sleep. And that’s how it’s been for three years. So when you read articles about how sleep deprivation is a threat in wars between countries on another continent—you want to laugh hysterically 👇

Because I know what that is. And I want to tell you that you get used to it too. And when you go outside in the morning—you see the coffee shop near your home is already open. And the supermarket too. You get your coffee, buy cigarettes, and head to the metro 👇

You walk there angry and sleep-deprived. But alive. And not injured. And as awful as it sounds—you’re grateful for that. Because if you made it through the night, then today you can do something important. Because someone else wasn’t as lucky 👇

People sit in cafés, eat croissants, drink their coffee. But before that, they might have spent the night in a metro station, an underground parking garage, or a basement. Or in the bathroom. And this is now the fourth year. And the war itself—the twelfth 👇

And I’m not even going to try describing how people live in Kharkiv, Sumy, or Odesa. And especially Kherson, where Russians literally hunt people using FPV drones. That’s a whole different level of terror and trying to survive within it 👇

And yes. That’s why any news about Putin’s so-called “desire for peace” makes us furious. Because we hear that fucking “desire for peace” several times a week. And Kharkiv or Sumy—every single day. There is no desire for peace. And there won’t be 👇

Because Putin only understands strength. That fact is as simple as two times two. But some people—and okay, some politicians—pretend things aren’t so black and white. And countries that once gave your country security guarantees (fuck that) can’t even close the skies over you 👇

They not only refuse to give you air defense missiles for free—they refuse to sell them. And yes, Ukrainians are very angry about that. Incredibly. Because they have every right to be. We’ve lived three years under full-scale war and nightly terror 👇

Thanks for coming to my TED Talk. I hope you never have to experience anything like this. Because learning how to live in full-scale war isn’t a skill anyone should ever have to acquire.

Here we go again 🤷🏻‍♂️

And again. After the alert about the launch of an aeroballistic missile, you have one minute. I've never run to the parking garage that fast. This time, the missiles flew past Kyiv, so all we heard was the Mach cone.