Mr. Possible Profile picture
Jul 10 14 tweets 3 min read Read on X
I have this friend-turned-stranger I haven’t spoken to in a long time. But it still doesn’t feel real. Their voice lives in my internal dialogue. You know how some people stay so alive in you that the idea you haven’t spoken to them feels absurd?
Only recently did it occur to me that I’d been hallucinating their presence. Didn’t know because I remember our conversations so vividly, my brain had started treating them as current. Until it plateaued. Memory turned cold and I recently accepted I had lost this person.
I randomly thought of her today, as I was mulling over an idea we once discussed 3 years ago. She had this spiritually edifying personality that transcended romance. Her questions, mature reflections, retorts, and mannerisms were deeply stimulating for my psyche.
Quite funny how as you grow older and become more layered, you begin to realize how few people can truly meet you across all your dimensions. And how adult life quietly discourages trying. Social and romantic rules nudge you toward narrower, neater boxes.
The architecture of adult life just gets more rigid. Responsibilities deepen, expectations harden. And the space for expansive, soul-deep connection shrinks. So you start settling for fragments of yourself in different places and you make peace with solitude.
If you’re lucky, you find someone you’re both romantically drawn to and multi- understood by. But even then, it’s rare for (and unfair to expect) one person to meet every shade of you especially if you’re atypical, layered, or worse, emotionally complex.
Yet, the deeper you move into intimacy with one person, the more you’re expected, whether by culture, norms, even your own fears, to shrink. To consolidate the fullness of your relational self into one sanctioned role: partner, spouse, soulmate. That’s all.
You accept the idea that one person must be enough. They can meet your emotional needs, intellectual curiosity, spiritual hunger, sense of play, existential ache, creative longing, and physical desire. And if they can’t? Well, you have to try harder. Expect less. Be grateful.
We convince ourselves that losing rich, rare connections is the cost of loyalty. That sacrifice is maturity. But the truth is that we are relational beings. Polyphonic. And some parts of us only come alive in contact with very specific people.
Some of those people may never be your partner. Or even anyone with a defined role in your life. But they are significant. Spiritually. Emotionally. Existentially. Their absence feels like a light went out in a room you didn’t realize you were living in until it was put out.
Some people walk into your life and unlock something spiritual in you. And when those people fade away, the grief is hard to name. There are no rituals for it. No funerals for fading friendships. No ceremonies for silent disappearances.
What’s worse is they rarely leave due to harm or betrayal. They leave because of structure. Because of time. Because “boundaries.” Because our society has no grammar for deep, non-romantic intimacy that coexists with committed partnership.
I think often about those people, men and women, I’ve had rare, layered connections with. Some endured, most didn’t. And I remain grateful for those experiences. I understand now that the fatigue of adult life can make you even stop trying. You just…cope.
And I get it. If you want to have a family, structure matters. You either find ways to maintain these soul connections in silos that won’t destabilize your primary relationship or you let them go. Sad, but… it is what it is. The truth is never easy.

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More from @Mrpossidez

Jun 29
“School” is not a scam but it’s not why people succeed. As someone who did really well academically and works with a lot of outliers, I can tell you this: character is the real compound interest. Not “academic excellence”. I’ll explain a bit:
Success people I know, have these core traits in common: (a) agency - they don’t wait to be taught, they pursue core interests even if off-syllabus, (b) metacognitive humility - they can step outside their own thinking for the big picture, and (c) a strong bias toward action.
Schools may nurture (sometimes even neglect) these traits above, but they don’t inscribe them. Because these are not curriculum outcomes. They’re character outcomes. They multiply exponentially in real life, making the bearers successful and extremely difficult to compete with.
Read 9 tweets
Jun 29
A strong sign that someone has a more incisive intellect than you do, is in their ability to generate ideas or ask great questions you couldn’t have come up with. A really good question is a partial discovery. Any (smart) person can understand or criticize after the fact.
Retrospective clarity isn’t on the same scale of value as original vision or ideation. People sometimes overestimate their ability to understand articulated ideas. While that is not easy for everyone, it’s not the same as thinking originally.
We often treat questions as placeholders for ignorance, but the opposite is even truer: the ability to observe and ask great questions means the mind has already begun the work of transformation. The answer, when it comes, is a reaction. The real leap had already happened.
Read 8 tweets
Jun 10
There is no way to know your prayers work. You prayed, something happened, and you concluded that the prayer caused it. A million causes were at play, you simply chose one. You basically retrofitted causality to meaning. But this doesn’t mean skeptics have the upper hand either.
I sometimes fall into the trap of imagining that skepticism holds the upper hand because it demands evidence. But in reality, both belief and disbelief operate on interpretations of uncertainty. The difference lies in where you locate meaning, not in who possesses “truth.”
There is no empirical mechanism that can isolate divine causality. You can’t rerun your life in a controlled experiment where you don’t pray and compare outcomes. So, while every “answered prayer” is, by nature, non-falsifiable, same can be said for other forms of certainty.
Read 8 tweets
May 4
To be a Christian, truly, is to sincerely desire not to fall short, not merely knowing that you may unavoidably fall. And if that desire is absent—if you are not unwilling to sin—then your religion is theater. Very simply, this is why I’m not a fundamentalist Christian.
I am not unwilling. I not only accept that I will fall short, I believe, quite soberly, that the complexity of human life makes orthodox “sinfulness” not just probable, but also necessary. Certain actions and contradictions cannot be resolved by rule, only by presence.
Not all virtue lies in abstention. Some lie in moral tensions, whereby to do right by one principle is to necessarily violate another. I’ve accepted that morality does not always map cleanly onto action, but rather onto context, intent, and impossible choices.
Read 9 tweets
May 2
I think you can love someone fairly unconditionally. You can love someone even if you’re not with them or expecting anything in return. But within a relationship, it becomes conditional. A relationship has its own life. It breathes. It makes demands. It has its rules.
I know people define love as a choice or impose other virtues unto it but I don’t think love is complicated. I don’t think it’s more than deep affection and endearment for someone that inspires (but is not automatically equal to) respect, loyalty, compassion and care. Simple.
In a way, I think of love like the light. It illuminates. But a relationship is like the vessel, it holds. Without a vessel, the light can still exist, but it has nowhere to settle, nowhere to shape into something mutual and sustainable.
Read 13 tweets
Apr 13
Here’s one story that shaped me in many ways. Throughout school, I was always first in class. It came naturally to me. I understood quite easily, could memorize with ease, and could read between the lines before most people around me could finish a sentence.
It was normal in my household. Like me, my elder sister was first in her class too from kindergarten till university. It never felt like an accomplishment. There were no congratulatory dinners in my house and most times, nobody asked what we got after the term ended.
But there is one term I remember vividly in secondary school. There was a boy in my class who always came second. I admired him so much. I always told him he was smarter than me and I meant it, though he never believed. How could he? But I really did. He was perfect in my eyes.
Read 23 tweets

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