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🌾🍁🍂 bosco 🍂🍁🌾 Profile picture
@selentelechia
Aug 3 • 7 tweets • 2 min read • Read on X
how is third trimester simultaneously so emotionally volatile and also so fucking boring
I hate needing to sleep more than seven hours, I hate feeling physically limited, I hate being oversensitive and sore and tired, I hate having hormones, turn me into a computer, embodiment is a stupid fucking op
all I want is to be happy and energetic and feel reliably comfortable engaging with my kids and have total control over whether or not I'm being touched or having to listen to incredibly loud noises at any given moment
I do not want help I want to not need help
there was a decent (but ofc imperfect) book I was reading that had some good advice and I briefly implemented some of the tips to great success but then upon rereading in a less enthusiastic state I encountered excerpts that were so aesthetically repulsive and stupid that now I'm worried using this book's advice will make me even more stupid than I am in my current condition
it was "the empowered wife" and I think about 30% of it was actually novel advice that would be good for me but I don't think I can risk even a 2% chance that listening to her advice will make me find something like this anything less than contemptuous 😅 Image
I'm fine I'm just like

sitting outside in the sun and purging all of the cranky toxic hyperbole somewhere relatively harmless

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More from @selentelechia

🌾🍁🍂 bosco 🍂🍁🌾 Profile picture
May 30
when I was seventeen a friend gave me a copy of the anarchist's cookbook and I was chatting w/my parents about it and my dad warned me that a lot of recipes in it were wrong and my mom was like "didn't you burn off your eyebrows playing around with that book"
one reason I didn't mess around with a lot of teenage rebellion stuff as a kid was that my parents did it first and I knew if I got caught they would make so much fun of me
imagine trying to be cool and edgy as a teenager and flying right under the bar your parents set in 1985
Read 7 tweets
🌾🍁🍂 bosco 🍂🍁🌾 Profile picture
May 24
I have a lot of familiarity with the foster system (my parents were licensed for a decade and I worked with adopted kids for seven years)

and the trickiest thing about this discourse is...
...that on one side you will have people who mostly know about tragedies involving state overreach, wrongful removal of children, false and punitive reports, etc...
...and on the other, you will have people who mostly know about cases of CPS refusing to investigate obvious abuse, repeated reunification with parents who should have lost their rights years ago, just some of the most heinous shit you can imagine
Read 9 tweets
🌾🍁🍂 bosco 🍂🍁🌾 Profile picture
May 14
thinking about when my dad was teaching me to drive and had me do my route to school (12 miles away) three times: once at the speed limit, once at the speed limit, once 5-10 miles below, and once at 5-10 miles above

had me pay attention to how each drive felt and timed each one
he pointed out how often I had to slow down for other traffic while I was speeding, how focusing on speed, excessive caution, or perfect adherence to the speed limit changed my relationship to the flow of traffic, how much the time to my destination varied (not much), etc
he wanted me to internalize a couple of things:

- speeding to school wouldn't necessarily make me meaningfully less late if I was already late
Read 12 tweets
🌾🍁🍂 bosco 🍂🍁🌾 Profile picture
May 5
I never attended CFAR but I internalized some of the practices after reading breakdowns of them and maybe this was a failure to transmit the lesson over text, but some of them really got into my psyche in a bad way

ex: murphyjitsu
Murphyjitsu is where you have a goal and you imagine precisely how you might fail at that goal until your plans are so fortified that failure would shock you

but it turns out that this kind of negative orientation towards goals is not effective at all for me Image
it's basically just envisioning failure over and over and over which the manifestation girlies will tell you is precisely how you summon failure
Read 24 tweets
🌾🍁🍂 bosco 🍂🍁🌾 Profile picture
Mar 28
I wonder if some of the anxiety around AI art is that "art" at a certain level of...quality? it isn't the right word but let's run with it for a bit

art of a certain quality is functionally infinite for a massive % population now

and that changes art for us
when I was sixteen I worked for a furniture store

we had all these gorgeous paintings for sale

being somewhat familiar at this point with art auctions and pricing, I was shocked that they were only a few hundred dollars a piece
my boss proudly explained that every piece was in fact painted, not printed, and there was a company they ordered from, they had a set list of paintings in their catalogue and people in a shop in Asia would replicate them by hand

hundreds of workers, hundreds of copies
Read 29 tweets
🌾🍁🍂 bosco 🍂🍁🌾 Profile picture
Feb 20
the last time I talked to my dying grandfather was over a zoom call

we had to wait a year for his funeral

shortly afterwards, the script flipped and it was suddenly socially acceptable to attend large outdoor protests
we were trying our best to participate in a novel set of (temporary!) norms, provisionally trusting that someone was trying to think clearly about what might be helpful, and missing out on a great deal
and then instead of just announcing that it was probably actually pretty safe to meet up outside, the very human thing that everyone had been aching to do was permitted if and only if you were willing to participate in a political purity test for one side of the aisle
Read 40 tweets

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