With Russian bots and propagandists again spamming all of the internet with the same three fancy looking places in Moscow and St. Petersburg, I figured it'd be a good time to write a continuation to my travel guide to Russia.
Welcome to vol. 2 of "Posh Russian cities"! Enjoy!🧵
Boasting one of the largest train stations in Russia, very much a necessity given the population's favorite pastime is leaving, Novosibirsk fields enough sinking and tilting buildings to make the skyline look like it was designed by a drunk architect, which it probably was.
Famous for having the world’s largest Lenin head and pretty much nothing else really, Ulan-Ude is highly recommended to those looking to experience a sense of existential insignificance and dread, best appreciated while standing directly beneath Lenin’s unblinking gaze.
Kemerovo, the coal capital of Russia, a city often refereed to as "oh God, please no" and "this year's worst mining accident", is a place where you will learn to better appreciate industrial pollution and discover you've been coughing like an amateur all your life.
Yakutsk, affectionately known as "hell, but cold and drunk", is a fan favorite and a must see among all those that travel in the interest of starring at frozen pipes and fish. Likewise, the city is proof that diamond ore does not need stay in the way of cripplingly poverty.
The much beloved to Russian mothers city of Tolyatti, home to the plant producing the country's highly sophisticated cardboard boxes on wheels occasionally referred to as "cars" or "Ladas", is the place where one can witness Russian industry pretend it didn't die.
Khabarovsk, well known as the city listed on most maps as "not Vladivostok" and living proof one doesn't need a nuclear reactor to have a nuclear accident, is a vibrant and cheerful place which can, despite best assurances from local authorities, quite possibly make you glow.
The northern city of Arkhangelsk, Russia's very own version of the "City of Angels", is widely known to be the leading and foremost proponent of the Russian "oblique architectural style", thanks to its many wooden skyscrapers sitting at not quite the recommended angles.
While it being the birthplace of the Kalashnikov rifle usually steals the show, Izhevsk is also known for its rich cultural scene according to most Russian state publications. The place is highly recommended to those looking to "touch grass" and don't mind searching for it.
With a climate constantly trying to either freeze or sunstroke everyone and nearly whacked by an asteroid at one point in its history, Krasknoyarsk is the place to spend the week-end, if you ever find yourself looking to get away from it all and poised yourself on aluminum.
Mirniy, a town which dug an exceptionally large hole in quite possibly in hopes of distracting everyone from all of Russia's misery and suffering, will give visitors the unique chance to rethink their life choice and wonder why they didn’t go literally anywhere else.
If you'd like to give vol. 1 a go, you can find it below:
I think the best way to anticipate where the US is headed next is by looking at the life of Stephen Miller, the US shadow president and very embodiment of evil that is now appearing on every TV channel to defend the ICE agent that summarily executed an innocent woman.🧵
Having went bald and aged some 37 years in between the ages of 15 and 17 and already an avid reader of "Guns&Ammo" magazine by the age of 12, Miller would eventually let his only friend know they can't see each other anymore on grounds of him being the wrong shade of white.
Failing in his bid for Student Government, having run on a platform that argued students should not have to pick up trash, because, in his view, that was the God given role of Black and Latino janitors, Miller began incessantly calling into local neo-Nazi radio shows.
To highlight Russia's willingness to negotiate and because we tend to lose track of facts and statements, I've compiled a list of all threats and predictions made over the past 2 years by Dmitry Medvedev, former president and current deputy chair of Russia's Security Council.🧵
January-February 2024
Russia to soon get Alaska.
Texas to become independent with Russian help.
Threatens Sweden with annihilation.
Threatens British PM with cluster munitions.
Threatens Ukraine with nuclear missiles.
French farmers to start a revolution against Macron.
March-April 2024
European ambassadors to be kicked out of Russia then all of Europe to get nuked.
Claims Latvia doesn't exist.
The French and the Anglo-Saxons threatened be nuked.
Threatens Latvia with nuclear weapons.
The French and Germans threatened to be nuked again.
Since I actually happen to be from Transylvania, seeing so many people call Stephen Miller a vampire made me want to take a closer look at the life of this man suspiciously passionate racial purity who has so far spent nearly every waking moment of his life hating immigrants.🧵
Having went bold and aged some 37 years in between the ages of 15 and 17 and already an avid reader of "Guns&Ammo" magazine by the age of 12, Miller would eventually let his only friend know they can't see each other anymore on grounds of him being the wrong shade of white.
Failing in his bid for Student Government, having run on a platform that argued students should not have to pick up trash because, in his view, that was the God given role of Black and Latino janitors, Miller began incessantly calling into local neo-Nazi radio shows.
Because most of my fellow Europeans haven't had the time nor stamina to fully acquaint themselves with the complete spectrum of insanity that is the current U.S. administration, I've taken it upon myself to offer a brief, honest introduction to its main characters.🧵
Often affectionately referred to as "pure f*cking evil" by her closest friends and by everyone who has ever met, seen, or heard her really, Kristi Noem is the woman Trump tasked with deporting people to Salvadoran concentration camps, after learning that she shot a puppy.
Robert F. Kennedy Jr, the former heroin addict and self proclaimed imaginary brain worm survivor that once admitted to having eaten a dead bear he stumbled upon before burying the carcass in New York's Central Park at night, currently serves as the U.S. Secretary of Pestilence.
I figured the best way to celebrate Ukraine sinking another Russian submarine would be to revisit what is arguably the greatest feat of incompetence in Russian naval history, for now.
This will be a TLDR of the utterly idiotic voyage of Russia's "Second Pacific Squadron."🧵
With the population on the verge of revolution, Tsar Nicholas II figured a short and easy war would be just what he needed to help with his popularity.
Of all potential candidates for that "short and easy war", in a well-thought-out move, he picked Imperial Japan.
Admiral Makarov, arguably Russia's most competent, was sent out to lead the Russian Far East Fleet, stationed at Port Arthur, today in China.
For Makarov, the Trans-Siberian train ride all the way to the Far East was to be an extremely long and tiresome one...
Much like JD Vance, Elon Musk and Bob, the Nascar fan from Alabama with some really strong opinions about European integration, I too have asked myself the age old question: "what has the EU ever done for us?" and decided to have a look at some of the latest countries to join.🧵
Since tragically joining the union in 2004, Poland has barely even managed to quadruple its GDP and start what is routinely reffered to as "The Polish Golden Age", likely an achivement completely unrelated to the quarter of a trillion dollars worth of EU funds it received.
Joining in 2007, moment at which it famously topped world charts in efficient governance and standard of living, average wage in Romania went from a nickel and a smile to about $1200 net, with Bucharest alone now having a bigger GDP than all of Serbia and Bulgaria combined.