LXC: I thought your car was fixed now?
LWJ: It broke again this morning.
LXC: You haven’t even driven it today.
LWJ: Yes, very unfortunate I must take it to the garage again.
LXC: The garage that Wei Ying owns, the garage where he works often shirtless?
LWJ: I do not recall… LXC: Suddenly you don’t recall, let me refresh your memory…a few months ago we found out that Wei Ying had not only returned but that he was running a garage with his brother not far from here. Since then your car has been mysteriously stuck down with an issue every single day.

It is the day of Wei Ying’s wedding but he has suddenly decided he cannot marry Lan Zhan…

WWX: Jiang Cheng! How can I leave you! No one will ever marry you! Without me, you’ll be alone!
JWY: For gods sake, get married! I want to be alone!

(Xicheng and Wangxian) WWX: No, Jiang Cheng. You don’t want to be alone. My poor unwanted brother. I can’t leave you on the shelf without me! No one will ever pick up such a prickly pear!
JWY: Leave me on the shelf, I beg you.
WWX: No, I shall not marry Lan Zhan today. You need me too much.

WWX: Lan Zhan, there is a man following you.
LWJ: I know, he is…
WWX: He’s been following you all week!
LWJ: I know, he is my…
WWX: It’s okay Lan Zhan, you can stay at mine. I’ll protect you from this predator! We will have to share a bed though.
LWJ: I am so afraid. WWX: Don’t worry, Lan Zhan! We’ll lose him on the way to mine!
LWJ: I suspect that will not be very easy.
WWX: I’m excellent at evading capture, Lan Zhan. Don’t worry, I will keep you safe.
LWJ: I trust that you will.

WWX: Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit.
NHS: What?
WWX: I did what you said, I texted stuffy pants Lan Zhan to tell him we are having a party and we’ll try to keep the noise down.
NHS: Good! Hopefully he won’t call the police on us.
WWX: He replied it say thank you for the invite. NHS: No.
WWX: Yes. He is coming. Mr Stuffy pants is coming. The man who measured the grass in our front garden, is coming to our party.
NHS: Oh god, cancel.
WWX: We can’t! Everyone will arrive in an hour.
NHS: Shame. Maybe I can accept one of my other invites.

A-Yuan: Baba, remember last night when you said you wanted to marry Lan Laoshi?
WWX: Ha ha! I didn’t say that little radish!
A-Yuan: Yes you did baba! I heard you! You said it after you had some of your special fruit juice.
LWJ: Wei Ying wishes to marry me?
WWX: Errrr…. A-Yuan: Yes! And he said you were so pretty that it made him sad. Why does it make you sad, baba?
LWJ: Why does it make you sad?
WWX: It doesn’t make me sad! I’m very happy that Lan Zhan is handsome! Let’s talk about something else.
A-Yuan: Okay, I’ll talk about the house!

LWJ: Thank you for accompanying me to the bowling alley.
LXC: I am happy to, even though I do not have your skill Wangji, I won’t be much of an opponent for you.
LWJ: That is okay. I will enjoy destroying you regardless.
LXC: Oh they are very good aren’t they? Wangxian and Xicheng Fluff. ❤️

Lan Zhan shouldn’t be here. He doesn’t date. He NEVER dates. Why had he let brother talk him into this? Now he was sitting at a table in an unfamiliar coffee shop waiting for a man who he had never met but who seemed to be okay as they had messaged each other over the last week. Lan Zhan fiddled with his green tea and checked his phone. Five minutes. The man was five minutes late. He was probably on his way. It was only a few minutes. Lan Zhan made a square on the table with the sugar packets. Fifteen minutes later he received a message from the guy.

Foxxian LOVES his Lan Zhan. He met him one day when he accidentally got his paw stuck in a drain grate. Lan Zhan freed him and took him home and gave him a heat pad to lie on and lots of lovely meat. Lan Zhan had been a little surprised when Foxxian had transformed into his human form and thanked him but he had accepted the news impressively well. That was just one of the many ways Foxxian’s Lan Zhan was better than other people.

Wei Ying comes into Lan Zhan’s obscure book store looking for his son who ran in a few minutes before him and is currently attached to Lan Zhan’s leg under the counter.

“Excuse me good Sir, have you seen a boy who answers to the name of A-Yuan? Very cute but disobedient?” Lan Zhan didn’t know how to respond. There was a child attached to his leg shaking with laughter and a very, very handsome man leaning across his counter and winking at him as though Lan Zhan was in on the joke. Lan Zhan desperately wanted to be cool for once in his life.

Wei Ying had just narrowly avoiding having his head ripped off by a ghost with so much resentful energy pouring out of it he wondered if it was somehow related to Jiang Cheng. Now he sat in the inn drinking a glass of courage when he heard something that shook him to his core.. “I heard that Lan Wangji has finally found himself a girl.”

“Bout time! Thought he was gonna die untouched!”

The two drunks laughed. Wei Ying felt his heart plummet to the ground. But why was he so affected? This was good news right?

Wei Ying met Lan Zhan while he was studying at Cloud Recesses. Lan Zhan was in-charge of quite a few of Wei Ying’s punishments during his time there, but the two of them eventually struck up a friendship and when Wei Ying returned home, Lan Zhan started sending parcels. Wei Ying was so confused. Lan Zhan constantly sent him tea leaves. Wei Ying didn’t even like tea! Yet every week a new parcel of a different tea would turn up at Wei Ying’s quarters.

WWX: Oh my god isn’t it amazing how this dorm has a housekeeping service? My room would be so messy without it!
NHS: No dorms have a housekeeping service.
WWX: Ours does! The room I share with Lan Zhan is always clean and tidy the next day no matter how much mess I make! NHS: Oh sweetie. Why do you think that’s housekeeping?
WWX: Lan Zhan said it was.
NHS: I think maybe Lan Zhan is picking up after you and lying about it.
WWX: Oh my god. Really?
NHS: I’d bet money on it.
WWX: Oh god I have to find him and apologise!

When Wei Ying’s basket ball practise ended, Lan Zhan was waiting for him in the changing room. Wei Ying couldn’t help but feel like a sweaty mess when he saw his handsome boyfriend looking perfect without a hair out of place. “Lan Zhan! I told you to wait outside!” Wei Ying complained.
“I have not seen you all day, I missed you.”
Wei Ying hid his blushing cheeks in his locker as he retrieved his things. “Go away until I’m pretty again!” he complained.

Lan Qiren is always asking Wei Ying to help with his computer and Wei Ying always helps because he wants to be with Lan Zhan but he has refused to accept his best friends advances until he can get a sign that Lan Qiren will accept him. Lan Zhan has made it very clear that he wants to be with Wei Ying regardless of his Uncle’s feelings but Wei Ying knows how important family is and he doesn’t want there to be anything in their way when they finally start their romance.

LXC: Wangji, is the Yiling Laozu following us?
LWJ: Mn.
LXC: Do you know why?
LWJ: No.
LXC: Should we ask?
LWJ: I am waiting for him to reveal the answer himself. LXC: He seems to be mumbling to himself.
LWJ: Mn. He is agitated.
LXC: Have you quarrelled?
LWJ: No. Last time I visited the burial mounds we were very civil to one another.
LXC: Well something is wrong.
LWJ: If he wants to discuss it, I am willing to listen.

Fox spirit Wei Ying is hurt. He finds shelter under some trees and licks at his wound. He winds into a fluffy ball and hopes sleep will help. When he wakes there is a man approaching him. He growls a warning but the man keeps coming… The man crouched down a few inches from him and puts down some food. It’s chicken. Cooked chicken! Wei Ying shouldn’t eat it…it sends the wrong message…but he is so hungry and he needs to recover his strength to speed up the healing process.

It’s just popped into my head that if Wei Ying ran a boba tea place he would wear a T-Shirt saying “Suck on my balls” at work and delight in asking people if they enjoyed sucking his balls? Smitten customer Lan Zhan would have permanently red ears. It would take him until the 10th visit before he would finally pluck up the courage to say to Wei Ying that he had enjoyed sucking his balls on many occasions. Wei Ying would fall to pieces at that and Lan Zhan would push his advantage and ask if Wei Ying wanted to try his balls.

A-Yuan draws this picture of his Adie petting their bunny rabbit then takes it to school…

There is a note on the back from Lan Zhan saying: This is a portrait of me petting our rabbit, Snufkins. I am not acting inappropriately. You can call me if you need further assurance. Teacher Wei Ying does call after he stops laughing. He is struck by how deep and serious Lan Zhan’s voice is. He cannot help but tease…

WY: Do you enjoy petting your rabbit?
LZ: Very much so.
WY: How often do you pet your rabbit?
LZ: As often as I can.

Lan Zhan has a new motorbike. It’s sleek and fast. It is his silent rebellion against his Uncle who hates all things flashy and ostentatious.

Wei Ying, who has had a simmering crush on Lan Zhan for years, sees leather clad Lan Zhan on his Suzuki and tips over into infatuation. Wei Ying can’t just TELL Lan Zhan that he wants to do unspeakable things to him and then snuggle until the end of time, so instead he asks Lan Zhan a thousand questions about his bike which leaves Lan Zhan thinking that Wei Ying, his sweet forever love, wants to steal his bike.

Little Wangxian and Xicheng text fic! ❤️

Wei Ying and Lan Zhan went on their first date…one hour ago and Wei Ying wants to call Lan Zhan already…

1/7 Okay, Jiang Cheng is going to be supportive so Yanli doesn’t cut off his soup privileges… 😒

2/7

LZ: How was your date?
WY: Okay…he asked me not to use the cutlery in the restaurant though, he thought everyone should eat with their hands…
LZ: Everyone you have dated so far is not qualified to date you. I will take you on a date so you know what good date behaviour is. WY: Lan Zhan! You are right on time for our date!
LZ: Mn. Good date behaviour. I also brought flowers.
WY: Lan Zhan! They are beautiful! You are schooling me so well!
LZ: Mn. Let us go. There is much to learn.