Making new straight women friends comes with having to find out how male centered they are, & realizing how much it affects the quality of their life, if they are. Because they never shut up about men. Entire conversation cycles are about men, finding men, being with men etc etc I don’t know babe, I don’t want to sit through dinner talking about what happened with some loser I could give a fuck about. I have no interest in helping you figure out what to say to him. And I damn sure don’t want to waste my time giving you advice you are going to ignore.

I will be quicker to pay for advice from a licensed professional, who doesn’t go into a misplaced envious fit at the announcement of a mystery product from a celebrity. I would expect a professional to at least wait & review the product first, before recruiting people against it.

https://twitter.com/camillejanae/status/1658625816165748736

Oh that’s definitely envy at work there, because the OP has no reason to compare themself to the support Beyoncé will likely get, because she is BEYONCÉ. But that’s how ridiculous envy is, it makes you compare yourself without reason. In what world is Beyoncé not teaming up with

I just read a story circulating around on my TL about an envious friend, and I gotta say my worst thing about those type of people is how much they want to be close to you, when they don’t even like you.

Nobody wants to be in your space, knowing every detail more than them. And as a person who has unfortunately experienced that energy, I will never not find it so terrifying to know that people want to stay in your life, not because they care about you, but having access to you gives the negative stories they spread about you, more credibility.

One would hope that as women increasingly become more progressive, and deprogram themselves from misogynistic conditioning both religious & cultural, men would follow suit & also unlearn the pressure to live up to hypermasculine ideals that are unrealistic & unhealthy for them. Sadly, we underestimate how much male identity, for a lot of men, ties into fulfilling patriarchal expectations of masculinity.

In plainer words, how much they want to be like the men that came before them.

Many, long for their chance to feel the promised power of manhood.

I understand the growing concern for incel ideology and it’s grip on boys and young men, but nothing about any of this is new. Men posturing as victims and bemoaning any form of progress or concern for women, is the inherent order of a patriarchal society. It’s how we have lived. When we imply that incel messaging is new, we are not acknowledging reality. This implication posits a fair and just world, where only a small faction of society is misogynistic, when in reality, the majority of the world shares these incel talking points. We are raised on them.

I fear that people watch so many performative displays of romantic affection, especially in a time of social media couples who compete for popularity via romantic showmanship, that for some, it will begin to represent romance & intimacy goals, despite it being a performance. Porn turned sex into a spectacle, leaving a lot of folks more hooked on mimicking what they see & calling it good sex, actual intimacy absent. It has folks performing sex according to what they watch and I see that distortion happening with romance. Mimicry at an all time high.

As a childfree women, I have been told multiple times that I have yet to experience “life” & that i don’t know true love or purpose until I have a kid.
Even while I eye-roll hard, I do understand what drives this. People lives and realities are most often changed by having kids. To them, life has become extremely different. They have entered a new reality, that has weighted consequences, where actual lives are at stake. They now have responsibilities that are seemingly endless and while overwhelming, it’s on them to be safe place for their children.

Anyone even slightly on the fence about having kids, should read the Reddit group regretful parents. There, they are upfront and direct about ..everything, without blurring any details or sugar coating it with Disney visuals.
You have to want kids with your whole heart & soul. Out of respect for their privacy, I won’t share anything from their group. It’s a place for them to vent and express thoughts & feelings they have nowhere else to share. I am glad it exists.. for them. A lot of them knew early on that they were on the fence, but caved for love.