Southern raised man. I kneel to one King. You're playing Chess; I'm playing Hungry Hungry Hippos. No rhyme or reason. #BringLawnDartsBack
Dec 5, 2022 • 7 tweets • 2 min read
A Brief History of Food: A Thread
- Truffles: Fancy name for mushrooms.
- Mushrooms: Prior to WWI, it was food for cows.
- Parsley: Who cares.
- Small-Plate Tasting Menus: Poor people meals.
- Caviar: 1800's prison food. So disgusting it caused riots.
- Lobster: *See caviar
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- Oysters: Go to the sea, fill up a bucket.
- Sushi: Started as fermented rice to preserve raw fish.
- Quinoa: It's flower seeds. Get over it.
- Foie Gras: It's, essentially, hepatic lipidosis in geese. Illegal in over a dozen counties and California and New York.
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Nov 24, 2021 • 6 tweets • 1 min read
Erectile Dysfunction - A Thread
On his 70th birthday, a man was given a gift certificate from his wife.
The certificate was for a consultation with an traditional healer, who was well known to have a very good naturopathic cure for erectile dysfunction!
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As he despised western medicine, believing the conspiracy theory that they only represent the interests of big pharma, he consulted with the traditional healer.
The healer gave him a potion and with a strong grip on his shoulder warned,
