Dada news. Halfway true comedy and satire by @DashMacIntyre. I don't report the facts, I improve them. https://t.co/jjyLTxJe3E
Mar 21 • 6 tweets • 2 min read
BREAKING: A televangelist in Oklahoma says if Donald Trump loses Mar-a-Lago and Trump Tower it'll be obvious God doesn’t exist so nothing matters and he “might as well quit church and start being gay.”
A Homophobic Televangelist Claims His Gay Sex Tape Is “All A Big Misunderstanding” ⬇️ medium.com/@dashmacintyre…
Mar 7 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
BREAKING: A televangelist in Arkansas claims Taylor Swift is "brainwashing an army of young women and girls into feminist freedom fighters to someday conquer the United States and enslave all the men and peg them."
Meet The Pastor Who Believes Trump Is The Second Coming Of Jesus ⬇️ medium.com/@dashmacintyre…
Dec 16, 2023 • 7 tweets • 2 min read
BREAKING: A group of MAGA fans in Idaho just started a hunger strike they vow to continue until Joe Biden pardons Donald Trump.
Donald Trump Had To Be Physically Restrained Today In Court (Link ⬇️) medium.com/@dashmacintyre…
Jul 8, 2023 • 10 tweets • 2 min read
BREAKING: Florida Republicans want to ban “feminine products” from regular stores so Christians don’t have to see them, and have proposed creating a DMV-like government building where women must get a ticket and wait hours in order to buy tampons, pads, or Vagisil.
dashmacintyre.medium.com/if-women-wrote…
Jun 15, 2023 • 8 tweets • 2 min read
BREAKING: A hospital in the most MAGA town in America just bought 20 iron lungs because of an outbreak of polio after the mayor declared all vaccines were a "socialist brainwashing plot to inject people with Satan's semen."
dashmacintyre.medium.com/the-21worst-la…
Jun 14, 2023 • 6 tweets • 2 min read
BREAKING: After the Miami police fingerprinted Donald Trump, his prints matched some found at a crime scene of a McDonalds robbery in the 1970s.
dashmacintyre.medium.com/germany-was-no…
Jun 13, 2023 • 7 tweets • 2 min read
BREAKING: Donald Trump was reportedly difficult to fingerprint today because of the fried chicken grease and dried ketchup coating his fingers.
dashmacintyre.medium.com/trumps-white-h…
Jun 1, 2023 • 10 tweets • 3 min read
BREAKING: A MAGA country singer who claimed his music is written “to raise awareness about all the children whose blood is drank by Democrats” just got arrested for possessing child pornography.
dashmacintyre.medium.com/7-grocery-chai…
May 31, 2023 • 10 tweets • 2 min read
BREAKING: A group of 35 MAGA fans in Idaho are on a hunger strike, and say they will not eat again until every corporation in America renounces homosexuality.
dashmacintyre.medium.com/a-day-in-the-l…
May 8, 2023 • 9 tweets • 2 min read
BREAKING: A Florida judge has ruled that the Bible must be banned along with other books Ron DeSantis has banned because of how much murder, incest, rape, genocide, and violence is featured in the Old Testament.
medium.com/the-haven/elis…
Apr 29, 2023 • 10 tweets • 2 min read
BREAKING: Donald Trump just submitted paperwork to sue Jared Kushner for some of the money he made while serving in the Trump Administration.
dashmacintyre.medium.com/eric-trump-and…
Apr 29, 2023 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
BREAKING: Donald Trump has reportedly been depressed and mopey around Mar-a-Lago, and has told friends and advisers that his daughter Ivanka flipped on him for immunity.
dashmacintyre.medium.com/ivanka-every-t…
Apr 28, 2023 • 8 tweets • 2 min read
BREAKING: Donald Trump accidentally flew to NYC and walked into the Manhattan DA's office this morning when his criminal investigation proceedings were supposed to be with the Fulton County DA in Georgia. Trump said he had too many criminal investigations to keep track of.
dashmacintyre.medium.com/donald-trumps-…
Mar 22, 2023 • 11 tweets • 3 min read
BREAKING: The gay dating app Grindr says if Florida doesn’t stop passing homophobic and transphobic laws, they’ll reveal every Republican legislator and party official who secretly uses the app.
A "misunderstanding" dashmacintyre.medium.com/a-homophobic-t…
BREAKING: The Craigslist page for New York City is currently filled with posts offering $50 for people to come protest Trump’s coming indictment, and $75 for “anyone who is Black, brown or yellow.”
dashmacintyre.medium.com/trump-is-threa…
Mar 21, 2023 • 5 tweets • 1 min read
BREAKING: General Michael Flynn told a prayer group today that the military is in regular contact with aliens, and they will soon invade America from space to reinstall Trump as commander-in-chief.
dashmacintyre.medium.com/rudy-giuliani-…
Mar 21, 2023 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
EXCLUSIVE: Barron Trump reportedly terrified Donald Trump this morning by waking him up at 6am yelling, “Dad, the FBI is at the door!”
dashmacintyre.medium.com/melania-trumps…
Trump is flipping out at Mar-a-Lago over the latest developments of his grand jury and indictment news. Kevin McCarthy is being threatened.
MUST be okay with obstruction of justice and probably going to prison dashmacintyre.medium.com/help-wanted-jo…
Mar 16, 2023 • 8 tweets • 2 min read
BREAKING: Donald Trump is threatening that if he gets indicted over his Stormy Daniels payment, none of his loyal supporters will ever vote again.
It's a codeword for fascism. dashmacintyre.medium.com/coercive-conse…
