This book claims that black people built Stonehenge.

This might be amusing, were it not an award-winning work recommended for every classroom.

Here's a selection of absurdities it presents: 🧵 Black people have inhabited Britain for longer than whites.

Naturally, therefore, they built Stonehenge.

What is the basis for this claim?

"A new Caesar will come,” we are warned.

But is this a genuine caution, or the shameless self-preservation of the liberal elite?

With comparisons to Trump, The BBC and PBS team up to deliver a puzzling revulsion to Europe's greatest man of action: 🧵 Julius Caesar, master of Gaul, now faces his greatest challenge:

Subduing the hearts of a selection of podcast hosts, human rights lawyers, and other such experts.

Where is he going wrong?

Many have a soft spot for Austria-Hungary.

But as the most retarded belligerent of WWI, they truly deserved their defeat.

Eleven occasions Austria-Hungary lacked chromosomes: 🧵 Austria-Hungary's homosexual chief of counterintelligence, motivated by blackmail, money and thrill, leaked all of Austria-Hungary's battleplans.

Despite becoming aware of the leaks, Austria-Hungary did not significantly alter their plans before initiating WWI...

London, 1967. Within a generation, the city will become unrecognisable.

The justification we hear today is heartwarming: Caribbean workers selflessly answering the motherland's call to rebuild Britain.

Only one problem—it isn't true. 🧵 Unlike in the US, there exists no foundational reason for the presence of black people in the UK.

Therefore, the Empire Windrush was celebrated—a ship carrying hundreds from the Caribbean to post-war Britain to address labour shortages.

So what's the issue?

Some men live in fear of death, only to fall victim without a fight. Others court death in every engagement, only for it to slip through their grasp.

Napoleon's bravest soldier, Joachim Murat, was one such man.

Here are just some occasions when Marshal Murat defied death: ⬇️ ‘A Turk... did me the kindness of sending a pistol shot through my jaw.’

At Aboukir, the enemy commander shot Murat through his jaw, missing his tongue and teeth only because his mouth was open.

Napoleon quipped, 'It was the only time he had opened it for good use!'

A collective groan, the predictable 'why do you even care?'—and then memory-holed within a week.

Why do they keep doing this, and what should the response be?

Short 🧵


History enthusiasts will scoff, but this is of little concern to streaming platforms, who cater to a large, impressionable audience.

This audience, mostly unfamiliar with Cleopatra's Ptolemaic lineage, the ethnic composition of London in 1940, etc. are treated to 'docuseries'.

How should you respond to betrayal?

Napoleon, who considered this question more than most, offers a perfect case study.

Here are some examples, in order of severity: 🧵 ROUSTAM

When Napoleon attempted suicide before his exile, Roustam, Napoleon's personal bodyguard, had fled, fearing he would be blamed.

Receiving Roustam's letter asking to be reappointed, Napoleon said:

‘He’s a coward! Throw that in the fire and never ask me again about it.’

Napoleon's admirers, captivated by his greatness and omnipresence, believed he never have slept.

Discover the curious sleeping habits of a man who defined an era: 🧵 Before bed, he would spend at least an hour in the bath, reading or being read the news, whilst fidgeting with the hot tap, until the room became like a sauna.

‘One hour in the bath is worth four hours of sleep to me.’

“Comrade Stalin would like to invite you to dinner.”

This sentence filled every invitee with dread, yet all they could respond was: 'of course.'

As armed guards retrieved the guests from their families, find out why Stalin's parties were a fate worse than the gulag... 🧵 Though things started off innocently enough, the Chief of Secret Police, Beria, would keep a close eye on guests, reporting any that were pretending to drink.

Keen to impress, Beria did an impersonation of the dying screams of Grigory Zinoviev, whose death Stalin had ordered, which Stalin found hilarious.

Junot: Napoleon's 'Lunatic' Commander

Daring, loyal, yet tragically fated – dive into the extraordinary life of Jean-Andoche Junot, a man who lived and breathed for glory and pleasure.⬇️ Junot first appeared on Captain Bonaparte's radar at Toulon, by bravely volunteering to deliver a message to British lines, refusing a 'cowardly' disguise.

Later, when a cannonball landed feet away spraying them with sand, Junot's wit and composure henceforth solidified his position as Napoleon's aide-de-camp.