So by now we've all read about how people who have faced serious trauma or have depression or PTSD are managing to get through self-isolation better than the rest of the population because of our preparedness for horrible eventualities. I want to talk about a neglected aspect.
This is the aspect of hope. This is very different from managing to live, function and continue to be productive through the Covid-19 lockdowns. It's the part where you manage your expectations about the future. A future where we're not in lockdown.
One of the things that living with serious trauma that is not being treated or slowly treated (or worse, you're not even aware that it affects your life!) brings about is a sense of helplessness. Of isolation from joy, being surrounded by suffering and having no way out.
Dude has some supporters I respect and look up to. Some supporters that are my friends & colleagues. Some supporters I would literally die for.
And long after Bernie has disappeared from our lives, my relationships with them will continue, but
...there's also a second group of Bernie supporters, who are extremely detestable to say the least. People who've intertwined their own egos with Bernie's standings and positions. People who have and continue to hurt marginalized voices online and off.
I am going to wait for the primaries to end, hopefully in the next five thousands years. Whoever wins the Democratic primary I will support with many many reservations. But The harm caused by the second group of Bernie supporters will last far longer than you think.
Alright. Time to get my ass up and cook! This thread shall follow my many creations tonight. Stay tuned to find out what this Enby chows down on because they're too poor to order delicious take out every night.
Sautee onions. Add garlic and ginger! Then paprika!! Then quinoa and three cups of water! Booo yeahhhh!
Chop and add shiitake mushrooms. Heaven is so close!
Dear @GavinNewsom: I know you've been signing a lot of progressive laws lately, but I want to tell you a story today because I cannot forget it from last night and I'm hoping you'll remember this and work to do more because we are desperately in need of it.
@GavinNewsom .@GavinNewsome Last night, was invited to a graduation party at a nice'ish establishment in Sacramento. I felt uncomfortable for reasons (including being underdressed) and spent most of the night outside in the parking lot talking to a friend. That's when a pick up approached me.
@GavinNewsom@gavinnewsome .@GavinNewsome The man in the pick up truck asked me if he could talk to me for a second. I told my friend to hold. He asked me a very unusual question: "Do you know if the security in this parking lot is tight?"
He looked disheveled, sad and i was slightly taken aback. "Why?"
My Habesha Lyft driver and I were seriously hitting it off last night, but A) My sister called the Lyft for us so no way to contact and B) My little brother was in the car with us and I wasn't gonna give that fucker a story to share at every family dinner.
Bit of philological trivia, Ancient Egyptians found Ethiopians so hawt they called them Athtiu-abu, which translates to "Stealers of Hearts".
And I won't be trawling my sister's phone to get their phone. Even if they were not just being nice to me because it's their job, I am gonna assume they were.
One of the things that really hurts today that despite being a sexual and gender minority myself, I aill be relatively insulated from any decision against the LGBTQIA+ community by SCOTUS. There's potential for some of us being affected much more adversely than others.
A negative decision could first of all mean that anyone who wants to transition - even if they want to hide being trans or non binary later - will in the immediate run have to quit their job. You will lose income at the moat critical time in your life and have no $ support.
If you are trans and or non-binary and non-passing in the eyes of the Cis Empire, then you won't even be able to try and follow any future don't ask don't tell arrangement. This is also true for anyone who might be passing, but whose workplace already knows they are trans or NB.
I just realized I can explain succinctly why the name Khshayarsha is written as Xerxes in English.
I have become nerd, hogger of conversations. :/
For inquiring minds. Minds you, there is an even better explanation possible. (cc: @killianfantasy)
@killianfantasy P.S. The name Xerxes in Farsi خشیارشاه (Khshayarsha) is formed from the elements Khshay which means king/ruler and Arsha which means hero/man (as in manly). Combined they mean "Hero among Rulers" or "Ruler of Heroes". Yes, old Persian kings had METAL name.
You meet someone who you are not compatible with. They're still a good person, but y'all are just too different. Diff tastes, jokes, etc. But the sex... the sex is the best you've ever had. I mean, I'm talking unreal. Do you:
Just to be clear: when I said they are a good person, I meant they are politically to the far left, love animals and are charitable, compassionate and caring.
Only 1 in 10 would marry immediately? Damn, not a lot of thirst in my TL...
Every time I see a child cackling. Every time I see a dog with its tongue out. A tree swaying in the wind. A bird singing in the morning. Horses, squirrels, fish, humans... I think, "Wow, soon this will all be gone." Of course I'll fight to the bitter end, but I have little hope.
The saddest part is when I think of those who will be born after the worst has hit. They'll never know what was lost. They will be robbed of what was rightfully theirs by the greed of a few and the negligence of the many. How will they fight for what they don't even know?
So... I've been spending loads of time just chillin' at home, reading shit online, watching my favorite shows, drinking my iced tea, providing dick, and tending my trees lately. And I feel like if people found out, they'd think I'm lazy and should be doing something productive.
But like... what's more productive than just taking care of myself and being happy? And I have not been entirely self-centered. I've helped friends. I've taken part in every protest and action I could have. I have donated at least 10% of my income each month. I'm just... CHILLIN!
Of course, in a month, school and work start again. I'll be knee deep in writing papers and grading papers. But until then... I'm pretending around my family and even some of my friends that I'm BUSY when I'm not. Because capitalist conditioning leads of "productivity"-shaming.
Tonight I realized I'm a bit of a tease. But if you don't feel a connection, what do you fucking do? I need people to excite me. Make me want to make an effort. Not, "Yeah, sure. I'll be over!" Damn you age. I miss ankles giving me boners when I was 18!
It also makes me understand how my efforts at attracting older people when I was younger failed so miserably. Things feel so different now. People seem different. How you carry yourself is such a determinant on your attractiveness. How you speak, how you interact. Damn...
But I think the most important part of it is the psychological effort that goes into being intimate with people. And that effort requires so much more energy than does physical. Which means if you're going to do it, the person you want to be with must really deserve it.
Bedridden for four days now. All I've managed to do is eat, water the plants and take the dog out. That's it. Sometimes, being disabled means you get to be judged by people who can't see that being physically fine means absolutely nothing if your brain refuses to cooperate.
I need to hang some t-shirts in the closet. I can't. I can walk towards the t-shirts. I can pick them up. I can put them in hangers. I can hang them. Individually, I'm fully capable of completing these tasks. But my brain consistently refuses to complete the series together.
So all I'm doing is staring at them. They just sit in a corner. Waiting. For someone to hang them. That person apparently cannot be me for the foreseeable future because all my brain can do is making random noises and feeling like it's recovering from a huge hang over.
So fellow polys... how long do you have to be without a primary romantic partner for you to give up on the, "Right person!" and go for whoever comes along?
I'm asking this bcause I've been without one for a while and starting to wonder a little... I've had fulfilling secondary relationships (people with a primary partner other than me), have lovely people I hang out and sleep with casually and one-night-stands are still my thing BUT
I'm starting to wonder if being in a somewhat mediocre primary relationship is preferable to not being in one for a long stretch of time? Is there something to be gained from even mediocre relationships that cannot be gained in being happily without one?
The day I became an atheist was when I was 5, hiding with dozens of women and children in a grove of trees, surrounded by a field covered in decomposing bodies as a Soviet gunship indiscriminately blasted volley after volley of bullets into the trees to kill us. Now fuck off.
This isn't about faith or gods or religion.
This is about being so selfish about not being alone in believing something that you'd wish others pain, suffering and trauma so they'd come to sharing your belief system. That's one of the cruelest things you could do.
Charlyn is a trans Honduran asylum seeker, currently living with one of my friends in Sacramento while her case gets through the courts. We'd all really appreciate it if you could help with some of her expenses (only $1,300 to go!)? gofundme.com/f/support-char…
As a former Asylee, I can tell you that the time between you getting out of ICE custody and winning your case is the hardest - both emotionally, but also financially. Time for a crash course on what happens when you are an asylum seeker in the United States and its costs.
First of all, asylee do no have a right to government counsel. Yeah, this means if you are planning on applying for asylum, you have to hire your own attorney or find an organization that funds one for you. Otherwise, you have to represent yourself. This is a do or die situation.