my first interview candidate today ate what I believe to be an entire large 8-slice pizza during our interview 1. yes this happens a lot, last time it was a guy who got up to get his doordashed spaghetti
2. no, the weirdest was the lady with 3 walls full of funko pops behind her
3. no he didn't get the job he wasn't qualified
4. no the pizza didn't influence (3.)
5. cheese, i think

I’m gonna try making some Baja Blast chicken Now I have zero idea what I’m doing, so I’m gonna just add a bunch of shit and see what happens

since Elon and team just keep asking for money and won't actually kill off the bots, I'm going to make this a thread where I post keywords to bring them out of the woodwork

lost coinbase account metamask trust wallet crypto need essay written on a t shirt bitcoin doge shiba help boy i wish someone could offer me a fast Disney+ account or Netflix I am locked out of my accounts like Instagram, Youtube, Google, Gmail, bank, bank account, guess i need some cheap gats, I can't ask anyone on #instagram oe #youtube, i'll just have to sit here struggle

happy new years, I’m gonna have to take this air fryer out back like old yeller when this is over dumb website wouldn’t load— final minutes have elapsed.

The tuna? It has become charcoal, but mother of god it smells so bad, it’s fish charcoal
the pineapple? Probably still edible
the egg? No way twitter.com/i/web/status/1…

gonna air fry some tuna for 120 minutes and see what happens now, I have been instructed that I cannot do this indoors, otherwise @MrsKlobstar will end my life

so we’re outside this time

I’m gonna make Monster Energy Ultra Fiesta Mango Ramen

https://twitter.com/KLobstar/status/1551008660591202304

Now my wife, @MrsKlobstar is concerned I’m going to ruin the pan by boiling down just Monster, so I’ll be adding a cup of water to the mixture

gonna air fry an entire Mexican Pizza combo from Taco Bell for 2 hours and see what happens hang on I forgot to plug in the air fryer

yeah I’m thinking I can

https://twitter.com/mrsklobstar/status/1487446390527643652

2 minutes in and it sure smells like a hamburger

gonna air fry a Big Mac for 120 minutes and see what happens now I’ve learned my lesson from last year- no hotdogs. You can see I’ve also removed the lettuce from this burger, assuming it will catch on fire

gonna air fry a hotdog for 120 minutes and see what happens gotta do it in intervals

when i was a movie theatre projectionist, the other projectionist, Matt, would bring clam chowder for lunch every single day, refusing to put it in the fridge even though the projection hallway was well over 100° Matt once got into an argument with another employee so fierce that the off-duty cop who was doing security had to break them up all because Matt had established that 50 Cent's "Get Rich or Die Trying" movie was based on Hamlet (it wasn't)