Right. So, I’ve known for years the BBC has been a brittle car crash of cowardly compromise & lickspittling grovelling by its higher management, who of course went to the same schools as the political class which perennially kicks it about like a sad stepchild in a sleeping bag I know this because I was reared & educated in the same class, thanks to my embourgeoising through adoption. I also know that media/sports matrix overpaid celebs play the previous like a fucking Stradivarius, to levels so deeply embarrassing the homoerotic element’s the least…

Actually, just to piss yet further paraffin on the bonfire of Peter Hitchens’ vanities, he’s right to a tiny degree: the NASDP, previously The Workers Party, which Hitler join & took over in the early 20s, had a “left-wing” element mixed into the maelstrom of ever shifting…. …ideological chaos in Weimar, fuelled by both the FreiKorps & the structural example set by the success of the Bolsheviks - hence all the Party bollocks & those lovely leather raincoats. However, any lingering anti-Capitalist “leftism”, represented by the Roehm wing of the…

The point, tho, is that the extraordinary wealth of talent employed by the BBC has been systemically sabotaged by its management ever since its inception, with the occasional exception marking its periodic “Golden Ages”. Otherwise it’s been a cavalcade if breaking the General… …Strike, getting obsessively prissy about brand names or occasional smut, Bill Cotton pulling Dennis Potter plays minutes before they were due to air (aka The Bill Cotton Banned Show), pulling anything daring or slightly satirical, from That Was The Week That Was onwards….

Last night I went to @Chartist48’s 1st annual editorial board dinner in 3 years. I’ve drawn for them since 1986, tho they stopped paying me around 10 years later, tho they paid for my dinner & I read them the poem which follows of several tweets. Can you guess who it’s about? If…

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are telling you its contents don't inspire;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
Based on evidence that you’re a liar…

I think we’ve know effectively established “Boris” Johnson’s credentials as a KGB sleeper agent, committed to fatally undermining the credibility of the Conservative Party, the British Establishment & Britain’s standing in the world, under the cover of being a lazy & selfish… …pathologically lying bumbling fuckmonkey, a fiction maintained by the Tories up to & beyond his enforced resignation as admitting the truth would be simply too embarrassing. However, as his mission is now completed & even he recognised that turning up tomorrow in Moscow to…

Incidentally, if “Boris” Johnson weren’t the barely functioning instant-gratification junkie sack of sludge, he & his addled aides would big up the essential role of booze in politics. One 19th Century chancellor threw up over the despatch box during his Budget speech, Pitt… …the Younger was permanently pissed, the whole Cabinet were drunk, half of them asleep, when Britain declared war on Russia in the Crimean War, Asquith was so pissed he gave a new word - “Squiffy” - to the language, Gladstone was often so hungover in the Commons he could…

Though the question remains, of course, how badly Johnson pilces his own psychopathology. He obviously gets the kicks from getting away with the failures, the betrayals, the lies and the rest, fuelling his narcissism that he's extra special & therefore invulnerable. Trouble is... ...that his particular brand of needy psychopathy needs, for each fresh high, total irresponsibility compounded by a contempt for even the notion that those people things around him are anything other than mirrors to reflect back his own glory, which means it would be ludicrous..

Spent the morning writing down this lyric running through my head as I awoke. Apologies to Rogers, Hammerstein & everyone else
How Do You Solve A Problem Like Boris

He has a drink but doesn't think
That anyone will care,
Hosts a bash, goes on the lash
Then claims he wasn't there When asked for explanations
He'll blub it isn't fair
I think he's going to fuck it for us Tories!

He treats all high affairs of state
As just a silly game
While all other affairs he's had
Will see him shift the blame
While smirking for the cameras
Because he has no shame...

Wow! Yesterday I not only finally hired a Zipcar to take a load of junk to the Scope shop (tho it took me 15 minutes to work out how to start the bastard - whatever happened to ignition keys ffs?), I also rethreaded 2 broken blinds & we had our flu jabs. Plus, it seems, the… …wheels are finally beginning to come off the Tories’ flaming clown car. But what I truly wonder at is how long they thought the spell would last, & that a wholly selfish sociopath without principles, values, honour or even ideas beyond thinking up a fresh lie to expedite his…

More to the point, tho, is the bizarre psychopathology of Tories who aspire to leadership. Cameron thought leading the country was his birthright, & thus became our 1st Gap Year Prime Minister, merely on the way to greater opportunities to make money. Tho the languorous... ...complacency underwriting his whole shtik meant he’s comprehensively fucked up everything he’s touched. Then there’s Theresa May, who thought being Prime Minister was her duty & thus became our first Hobby PM. Sadly, the job is almost wholly about PEOPLE & their beguiling...

Been quietly avoiding the news since Friday - we all need time off, & y’day I crippled myself shovelling about a ton of soil & today walked for miles to, around & from @zsllondonzoo in I’ll-fitting shoes, so I’ve been in better nick all in all. NONETHELESS I’m in better shape... ...than cash-strapped mendacrat, mirror-hog & clinically obese sack of fat pantomime Prime Minister (where both ends are the arse end) “Boris” Johnson. If I were a Tory donor who’s forked out for his personal trainer I’d want my fucking money back!

Anyway, before I go to bed just this. Over the past 35 years I've worked for every national daily paper except the Sun & the Daily Star at some point, but now, aged 62, I'm delighted to be working fod the Antimatter of the Main Stream Meejah over at @BylineTimes - and I started.. ...last month with the first episode of "Infurno", the sordid yet truth life tale of what exactly is going on behind the matt black doors of 10 Downing Street. That first episode now follows in a series of cliffhanging tweets...

And to clear the decks here are the results of the #DrawGrantShapps Challenge. Going to skip through these to starve the littl eirk of the oxygen of publicity. Even if if he is Mick Jones' cousin. Anyway, here's @SwissRich71 with typical brevity & pith! And another lovely animation from @BurtOHare

https://twitter.com/i/status/1371046270337495042

plus these from @Andrewm82239566 @iancartoons & @Chance4321

Well, I met him 4 times, the last time being in my role as a vice-president of @OfficialZSL at the opening of the new Whipsnade elephant barn. He looked at me and mny fellow trustees and said "You lot look bloody freezing!" and moved on. The best occasion, though, was in his... ...role at patron of the The Cartoon Arts Trust, which runs @Cartoonmuseumuk. Before we found a permanent home I went to a fundraising dinner in St James Palace. There were only 3 living cartoonists there, me, Peter Brookes & Nick Garland. Garland's a bit too grand to meet...

OK lovelies, time for the results of the grand #DrawACovidDenier Challenge. Honestly, I was going to engage in a lengthy rant about these attention seeking psychotic cranks, but fuck em - why should they steal my life? Suffice it to say they have all the charm of the kind of... ...squalid psychopath who gatecrashes funerals to spit in the mourners' face to show them how brilliant they are at spitting, while the only qualifications of the higher profile hack cranks is a capacity to impress the editors of rags that think Journalism is just a side project

Right - you got four more days to get in your considered visual judgement on Rupert Murdoch in the Great (and Grassroots!) #DrawRupertMurdoch Challenge, while the Wrinkled Dynast seethes in his Thames Valley hideaway against the iniquities of Cancel Culture. Bang right Cobber! And in that Spirit of Free Expression here are some Rupes of mine own from down the years. From @M_Star_Online

Ok folks, as Tempus never endingly fugits, time for the results of the #DrawTheInauguration Challenge. This was run in partnership with @Cartoonmuseumuk, and you can see all the entries here ... ...and it was different from all previous #Draw Challenges inasmuch as @Cartoonmuseumuk used the Challenge as part of its educational outreach programme, encouraging homeschooled kids to have a go, working on this downloadable template. Cute, huh?

Right, and because I've got a backlog, we're going to deal speedily with #DrawBorisJohnsonsLockdownBedroom Challenge. You can see all the entries here , but on this special special day of "Boris's" Sadness, I'm not going to drag this out. Special mentions.. ...therefore, to former winners @BurtOHare @JaseToons & @StuDrawings for these (the last one being particularly beautiful)

Right. Just been checking the final of proofs for #PlagueSongs, the daily verse project I undertook between May & November last year with @lukewrightpoet, whose childcare commitments meant he had to drop out & spend more time with his aching soul. Lovely @SmokestackBooks is... ...publishing more or less all of them (c160) this April. Throughout the sequence, it's interesting that occasionally I mention that day's Covid deathtoll, remembering that on 17th March Sir Patrick Vallance said "below 20,000" deaths would be a "good outcome". Well, by...

Well, he's only got a matter of hours left in office before he either flounces off to Florida to play golf or presses the Omega Button and we blip into a squillion photons of Unreality. Just time, then, to skip down Memory Lane hand in tiny hand with The Donald Trump I Drew... ...starting before he was even elected! Here we go, from December 2015 and March 2016

Right. Last day of the year, so I’ll be posting the winners to all the #Draw Challenges over the past 12 & a bit foul months. Right at the beginning we had no idea what he looked like - not now alas, tho @nuffinc already knew so won the #drawmatthancock Challenge! Next up I tried to get you to embrace your inner kitsch with the #DrawAKitten Challenge. A pathetic failure, frankly, & I’d forgotten that @BurtOHare actually won this with this. Keep an eye on her throughout