Naomi Kritzer Profile picture
SF/Fantasy writer who writes that Minneapolis/St. Paul election guide. She/her pronouns. New YA novel CATFISHING ON CATNET available from Tor Teen!
24 Mar
From the departments of "are you fucking kidding me?" and "Republicans in Disarray," this is sure a thing.
This made me really curious whether Democratic fundraising is vulnerable to similar levels of grift, and I THINK the answer is no, although I'm not 100% sure, but I went digging through the terms & conditions for WinRed, ActBlue, and Anedote, and let me tell you what I found.
If you donate to Democrats, you've probably used ActBlue. I checked their terms & conditions and found basically nothing about fees at all.…
Read 30 tweets
23 Mar
"Send us the shrimp tails so we can confidently state (again) they're not shrimp tails, then dispose of the evidence."
There's a bit in my novel CATFISHING ON CATNET about crisis PR. In the story, Steph hacks an "instructional robot" so that instead of delivering the planned sex ed unit, the robot is just handed over to the AI character, who answers EVERYONE'S questions rather colorfully.
This makes the local news, then spreads nationally, and the communications director of the robotics company finds himself in front of cameras trying to explain that it's the school's fault for not installing a security patch.
Read 9 tweets
4 Mar
This is a good thread and a good explanation and I just want to note, for the record, that @mattyglesias ABSOLUTELY KNOWS EVERYTHING EXPLAINED HERE, he just apparently doesn't think writers should be able to make a living off their books.
I think "life + 30" is a reasonable time frame. The one we've got, "life + 70," is too long and we should have told Disney to fuck off with their bullshit way before we hit this point.
If we had life + 30, all of Theodore Geisel's work would be in the public domain this year.
Read 4 tweets
4 Mar
I keep mentally writing AITA reddit posts on behalf of Harry and Meghan.
"My grandmother rules my entire family with an iron fist. I grew up that way so I was basically used to it -- until I married a wonderful woman and they were so nasty to her and suddenly I could see how awful they were. We moved 5,000 miles away to escape. AITA?"
"My family is trash-talking my wife to the press in a bid to keep me from talking about them publicly. WIBTA if I go ahead and do the interview I've got planned?"
Read 9 tweets
2 Mar
I wrote about some of Dr. Seuss's lesser-known books back in 2015, and if any of the people currently wringing their hands over Dr. Seuss being "cancelled" have ever read "Scrambled-Eggs Super" or "McElligot's Pool" I will EAT MY HAT.…
I want to note for the record that it's also not "cancellation" when the people you've entrusted with your literary legacy think that it's in the interests of your literary legacy if some of the books you wrote are allowed to be forgotten.
It is, in fact, entirely normal for a famous and successful writer to have books that stay in print and books that do not. There's a lot of stuff that doesn't age well. Sometimes you can do revisions, sometimes you just let the book slide into obscurity.
Read 14 tweets
28 Feb
I miss regretsy and cake wrecks and the idea that these sites would be internet 1.0 has turned me to dust where I sit
USENET: internet beta release
Check it out, this website tells you whether their coffee pot is full or empty: 1.0

We're on like Internet 4.3 before we even get to LiveJournal.
It is genuinely weird to contemplate how long ago HamsterDance was.
Read 4 tweets
21 Feb
I was pondering Internet communities and how certain portions can get really toxic and weird and was thinking about mothering dot com. This thread talks about the straight line that led a depressing number of people from "natural parenting" to QAnon.
When I was a new mom, in 2000, there was a store in St. Paul that sold breastfeeding supplies that I went to, and they also sold Mothering magazine, and I wound up subscribing briefly and finding my way to the discussion boards.
I was a regular poster there for a while. I don't actually remember how long -- after a few months I discovered another community that was a better fit, then moved on from there to a break-away community. (This was a super common experience for an online mom at the time.)
Read 23 tweets
19 Jan
So since we're talking about music and Joe Biden can I tell you how much the Hamilton song "Wait for It" makes me think about Joe and also about Joe Biden vs. Aaron Burr.

"Death doesn't discriminate / between the sinners and the saints / it takes, and it takes, and it takes."

Weeks after Joe Biden was elected to his first term in the Senate, his wife and daughter died in a car accident.
Of his surviving sons, one went on to die of cancer.

The other, Hunter, has struggled with addiction. To try to hurt Biden during the campaign, someone released texts sent between Joe and Hunter while Hunter was in treatment.
Read 11 tweets
18 Jan
I was pondering the fact that on Tuesday we're going to see 8 gazillion Les Miserable "One Day More" gifs and found this delightful flashmob performance from 2014.

I hope flashmob musical performances make a roaring comeback in 2022.

There are lots and lots and lots of Les Miz gifs for your use on Tuesday but there's also this one with Minions:
And if you want a slightly less ominous/more optimistic song from a musical, there's always:

Read 4 tweets
18 Jan
FYI, the sites are in San Diego, Boise, San Antonio, and Houston.
Oh hey!

There are actually a number of additional sites, they just make it very difficult to find them. Check out this page for the state you're in to see if it's recruiting:…
And since the Minnesota one says they ARE recruiting, I googled the research institute mentioned:…
Read 6 tweets
17 Jan
I had a few more things to say about the whole "aspiring writers who cut their teeth on fanfic" thing. (I'm not QT'ing the original tweet because at this point that would REALLY feel like punching down.) I want to talk about the writing I did as a kid & teen.
One of the things that got cancelled due to COVID last year was Minicon, and one of the things I was REALLY looking forward to at Minicon was a planned event where a bunch of us were going to pull out our oldest juvenalia for a reading.
The oldest juvenalia I have is from 4th grade, when I had a weekly assignment that was "write 1 page of whatever." The story I spent most of the year working on is about a girl who goes to summer camp and meets a talking horse.
Read 24 tweets
16 Jan
Having tracked down the Edgy Fanfic Take, what Sarah said is what I want to say.

You can write just because you want to write.
There are fanfic writers who want to become published writers of original fiction and are using fanfic to work on stuff in a way that feels fun.

There are also people who write fanfic because they want to write fanfic, and that's also fine.
And I hope the people who find joy, comfort, community, affirmation, pleasure, or distraction from their troubles in either reading or writing fanfic don't even read that person's bad take.
Read 4 tweets
16 Jan
I served food in my high school cafeteria, shelved books in my high school library, and scooped frozen custard for minimum wage. The library job was pretty great. Working at the custard stand sucked rocks through a bendy straw.
When I was a teenager, the minimum wage was $3.35/hour, which over the course of my high school years ranged in current value from $7.85 to $6.48.
I also babysat for $2/hour, which was less than I should have been charging. One parent paid me $1.75 and did not correct this problem when I finally got the nerve up to tell her my rate was $2. I said OK and was passive-aggressively busy every time she called after that.
Read 11 tweets
9 Nov 20
So look, it's fine, IMO, if you enjoyed the Lincoln Project's ads.

But FOR FUCK'S SAKE PEOPLE do not send them money. You shouldn't have sent them money before, DEFINITELY do not send them money now.
There are MANY worthwhile places to donate.

First off, Fair Fight Action, Stacey Abrams' group. Follow them at @fairfightaction, donate here:…
You can also sign up to volunteer for Fair Fight Action here:…
Read 8 tweets
7 Nov 20
A thread for me to show off my stress-crafting. I've been doing embroidery, mostly fairly small embroidery pieces. These are all freehand, I'm not using patterns. Inspired by some photos I've seen online of landscape embroidery that are really WAY more impressive, tbh.
The first piece I did, in September. Looking at this now, the thing I'm probably happiest with is the texture of the French knots for the "vague suggestion of flowers" near the bottom. Embroidery piece: sky, hill...
My next piece: Mount Fuji.

I was much happier with this one. Embroidery: Mount Fuji with...
Read 10 tweets
6 Nov 20
I've said for years that as far as I was concerned, Collin Peterson could keep his seat forever, and if anyone wanted an illustration of why it matters whether an extremely red district has a conservative Dem or a Republican as Rep, Fishbach's got you:
(This loss was entirely inevitable, that district went OVERWHELMINGLY for Trump four years ago and eventually Peterson was going to retire or die and at that point it was going red and probably never coming back.)
I say "probably" because, well, look at Georgia, for one thing. But also, Amy Klobuchar's popularity extends well outside the metro. Minnesota is kind of a weird state and I don't pretend to be an expert on anything outside the cities themselves.
Read 6 tweets
2 Nov 20
I want to talk about that bullshit "Bob and Sally" cartoon because I also have thoughts about staying friends with people while disagreeing with them politically.
I have MANY friends with whom I disagree about one or more of the following:

* municipal trash pickup
* parking minimums
* appropriate housing density
* snow plowing schedules
* school funding models
* speed limits
* bike lane design
* funding for public art
* park priorities
There are A LOT of questions in politics where reasonable people can disagree:

* How do we balance all the competing needs for money, from inspections to permits to filling potholes?

* In what ratio should we tax income, property, purchases? When do we raise $ with fees?
Read 6 tweets
5 Oct 20
I forgot to add a description to the gif. It's a guy skateboarding up to a barrier, trying to jump over it to land on the skateboard again, and fucking it up.
Oh man I really should have searched for "Wile E Coyote" when I was trying to find an appropriate gif.
Read 4 tweets
5 Oct 20
And here is the thread that was her LRT:

One of the weird frustrations of Twitter is what a radically different experience it becomes as your follower count rises.
Read 11 tweets
5 Oct 20
I am literally begging everyone in Minnesota to flip their ballot over and vote for Paul Thissen. Michelle MacDonald is a far-right Bible-prop-using drunk-driving frivolous-lawsuit-filing disaster of a candidate.
Her past shenanigans involve a non-profit that spent years mostly appearing to exist as a PR wing for a woman who kidnapped and hid her children as part of a child custody dispute while pretending they were missing.
Here's what I wrote about her in 2014, when she got banned from the Republican Booth at the State Fair:…
Read 6 tweets
4 Oct 20
The thing about steroids is that they do multiple things at once. This is true for most drugs, but it really does seem to be ESPECIALLY true of steroids.
Two of the major effects of oral steroids:

1. They reduce inflammation.
2. They suppress your immune system.

They're really good at both of these things and are in fact used for both of these clinically. Occasionally you want to do both at once!
However, if someone is sick with a virus, the "suppress the immune system" response is more likely to be a bug than a feature. (Not always, but a lot of the time.)
Read 13 tweets