White people who are friends with racists or people often accused of racism, if POC are anxious around you do not be surprised. For my sanity, I have often had to be distant for years if not for life. Many of you don’t realize how nervous you make us, how dangerous you can be. I bring this up to people & I get anger or there they never speak to me again. Okay. You prove a sad point. But maybe I was the fool for finding it okay to interact w/ you again. I just refuse to be afraid & deeply racist systems we endure make it so our silence is expected.

Skincare Twitter, not to be all Into the Gloss-y on this awful consumerist hell holiday, but as I unpack I keep finding treasures. A friend of mine got me this May Lindstrom Blue Coccoon sample & my god it is amazing. Only 180 dollars 😭

I will never forget doing a keynote conversation at this very event & being told Richard Spencer & his boys had crashed the conference

https://twitter.com/thelannancenter/status/978295393325903872

They came to a speaker’s Q&A. I was hanging with the amazing @Nic_Sealey when we heard about it. I can’t recall if RS himself was hanging out or if he just sent his boys; he had been banned the year before from several DC area spots & felt quite the victim washingtonpost.com/local/georgeto…

you guys this lovely woman whose daughter i have been helping sent me this amazing package in the mail to say thanks (even tho i said no you don’t need to do a thing😭) — so many lovely treasures including this Rubaiyat pocket edition There is no date on it—I have seen many ancient Rubaiyats (& i lost two old editions in my old apt that got destroyed) but this Dodd, Meade & Co looks 1920s or 30s?

I just gave myself a break from unpacking to read this profile. I think this profile is really interesting @trapmotives did an amazing job but this moment is exactly one of three that made me wish the energy of this interview would be given to POC writers

https://twitter.com/imjasondiamond/status/1433930963919179777

We say plenty of room for all but in my 20+ years of following how lit is covered there are only select people that get this treatment. one of my disconnects in reading MN, which i think many feel, is how so much of her work hinges on *feeling* not experiencing marginalization

Pretty sure my sliver of Manhattan skyline here is Billionaire’s Row, no? I am assuming that wonky horribly shaped skyscraper is Steinway Tower right? en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/111_West_…

My god, if you have the right personality—and glad I did & so many i know—this is one of the most exciting times in all history to be a journalist! No wonder the surveillance has been crazy again lately. One day I hope we can talk about the work @JasonLeopold & I did on this project, thx to @alessandra115 & so many at the old AJAM. it was one of the more dangerous things I have worked on but these diaries are so important & the US gov prob hopes you all are too busy to read it:

It’s been a mess in Forrest Fenn speculation & like I imagined a lot of people are trying to make money in the aftermath of his death. I’ve been saying what Margie says here—but I’d interviewed him even more & spent more time with him, searchers, everyone. sfreporter.com/news/lettersto… He doesn’t need defending but @DanBarbarisi & @tonydokoupil & so many more: there was a good reason why Forrest was so suspicious of you all. He understood better than anyone the evils of American capitalism & what a messy game this all is.

Me discovering people are just discovering Tina Fey & Bill Maher are racists in 2021. how many years have so many of us said this? way before this tweet

https://twitter.com/pkhakpour/status/899289657309102080?s=21

I can’t believe I have to make the following tweets but bear with me (they are on my to-do list for *reasons*): The Medical Medium in my opinion is an absolute con artist. I have been given his books (I have read 2), I have heard his talks, I have spoken to those he supposedly “healed,” & yeah nope.

I will say another thing also re today’s big topics here:

Media training is not a good thing & many authors are offered this & they sound terrible in the press (like weird robots or racehorses for their publishing companies). I always refused this & publishers let me because I was a journalist & have been on both ends a lot. I also just like to be myself & represent me as I am in whatever moment! I hate any sugarcoating or glossed over crud. It feels fake af & embarrassing.

I truly wish our East Asian brothers & sisters could include us in West Asia more when they say “Asian.” They do it with South Asia to an extent it seems, but it’s very hard to tell you all useful info that could help your causes too if we do not matter to you. This is not a criticism of East Asian communities—please do not attack anyone in our name. I grew up majority East Asian communities (Monterey Park, Alhambra, & eventually South Pasadena) & I deferred to East Asian everyone because they were so kind to me & my family.

There are some things happening that I am choosing not to discuss publicly—I will ask mentors, advisors, agents, cybersec. But I am not interacting like I normally do here. I am staying calm. This is not my first rodeo with dangerous people. Don’t assume you know who I am referring to. I have had several groups of stalkers & cyberstalkers since 2007 but my family endured some others earlier. Iranian public figures in the West go through this a lot—I’ve been prepared for these things since I was a child.

Every day so many of us become more clear on who has our backs & who doesn’t. It’s an education! We keep going, they keep getting in our way, they keep trying to use us for their own shit, we keep going even harder. I love you & see you, so many of you 💖💖💖 I am very clear with what my grandmothers wanted for me & the long line of women before them. They said, not this bitch, she is not that one that you push around & break, nope. Even when I let myself go they say, no, way, you got this because you got us. ✨✨✨

The other thing some of you don’t understand is many of us sincerely DO NOT want viral tweets. The few I have had over the years only brought lots of suffering—people purposely trying to not understand me & putting me back in a trauma I has as kid new to this country. I don’t have money to spend on really expensive therapists tho I was sent some new therapy suggestions by the daughters of an old mentor I trust so much. I have to make money & more than that time to go deep into my C-PTSD diagnosis.Right now I can keep things on the rails w/o it

People keep trying to hack me. It’s a waste of your time. I am happy to answer anyone’s questions. There is no double life I am living tho I often wish I were because this life is very difficult. It’s very exhausting though—I am dealing with about 5 very tough situations in addition to my many jobs & health issues & all that. I want to make sure more vulnerable ppl interacting with me are safe & some of you are really just obsessed with being full-blown monsters.