Slava Malamud 🇺🇦 Profile picture
Just a math teacher from Baltimore, tweeting about Russia, sports and politics, as one does. Atheist AF.
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May 9 4 tweets 2 min read
It's amazing that people in the West take this comedy sketch by Zelensky, which makes fun of Russians' perceptions of Ukraine, as a satire of Ukrainian Nazism.
Does sarcasm exist here? Do people understand what it is? Hey, @RepPress and other bots who crowd my timeline with this badly understood sketch. Here's another one, where Zelensky is even more scathing to Russians' stereotypes of Ukraine and perceptions of Ukrainian Nazism.
May 8 7 tweets 2 min read
About that. As a public school teacher, I am obviously biased. But also furious. I am absolutely fucking furious about GOP's vision of America's education.
And I know quite well what that vision is.
For starters, they are against public schools. Entirely. As a phenomenon... Republicans seem to be convinced that public education is some sort of communism that gives undeserving children (of poor families) a leg up in life at the expense of hard-working Americans, while filling kids' heads up with socialism.
But, most of all, Republicans hate us.
May 8 23 tweets 4 min read
Yesterday, I responded to @RadioFreeTom's thread about Russia's perpetual wandering from one oppressive regime to another, despite all the "greatness" that Russian history exhibits.
Today, I'd like to talk a bit more about "greatness" and how Russians, sadly, define it... What is it, even, to be a "great nation"? Traditionally, it meant conquering the shit out of everyone. This was how Rome became great. Persians. The Mongols. The British Empire.
Russia became "great" in this sense of the word in 1812-1814, after its key role in defeating Napoleon
May 7 14 tweets 3 min read
Tom asks the right questions and starts with the right premise.
The premise is: Russia has been incapable of building a free state that values individual rights or indeed of accepting these ideas as foundational values.
The questions are: Why? And WTF?
But there are answers... The problem is that Russia, for the last 5 and a half centuries, has lived in essentially the same state. Despite all the wars, revolutions and palace coups, despite all the name changes (Muscovy, Tsardom, Empire, USSR, Federation) it has never really changed since the 1470s.
May 6 6 tweets 2 min read
Joe is honest and speaks from the heart, but I really have an issue with the "These voters are gettable for Democrats of only they go to their diners, hold their hands and LISTEN" narrative.
They are not gettable. They will vote for assholes over pussies. Every single time... I'm sorry, "rust belt voters", but one mysterious soul to another, you ain't that fucking mysterious. You like Republicans BECAUSE they are assholes.
You know perfectly well that their policies won't help you. That they are there to look out for the rich.
You aren't totally blind
May 4 11 tweets 2 min read
One question I have gotten a lot after writing this thread: "Why exactly WERE there so many Russian/Ukrainian Jews among the Bolsheviks, if there was no conspiracy?"
It's a valid question, which, fortunately, has a very easy answer. The thread won't be long... Russian Jews were indeed extremely active in the revolutionary movement, and asking why is a bit like asking why so many African Americans were involved in the Civil Rights movement.
Jews were among the most discriminated against minorities in the Russian Empire...
May 3 6 tweets 1 min read
I'm not a lawyer (a huge disappointment to my Jewish mom) nor do I play one on TV (even more so), but you don't have to be one to see how horribly bad Alito's arguments are.
He basically could've saved a lot of time and paper by just writing: "Abortion is against Jesus, so ban!" First, WTF with this stupid argument citing Washington v. Glucksberg? Wasn't it about physician-assisted suicide? Well, no shit this wasn't a thing during the signing of the Constitution. But guess what was? Abortion was! Fetuses have been aborted since fucking Moses!
May 2 5 tweets 1 min read
Was "the Holocaust" actually Jews murdering innocent Nazis? Opinions of this Yekaterinburg "Kroshka Kartoshka" regulars are not what you might expect. "I have heard that Nazis hated Jews, which is a bad thing, of course", said Arseniy G., a 32-year-old veteran of the Third Glorious Alcoholic War. "But, on the other hand, Jews also hated Nazis, so they aren't exactly good either."
May 2 25 tweets 5 min read
Damn it, there are so many things I need to do today. I need to jog, pay my rent, shop for groceries, go to the gym, finish a book, cook dinner for my kid.
But first, I must, FUCKING MUST talk to you about how important yesterday's "Hitler was a Jew" rant by Lavrov was.
🧵 First, facts:
1) No, he fucking wasn't. I can't believe I have to tell you that. See the link. The entire theory was born because Hitler's father's original last name (from his mom), Schicklgruber, sounded funny to Russians. And funny to Russians = Jewish…
May 1 6 tweets 2 min read
Russia could've been celebrating all the amazing technology it invented.
Commemorating the great culture it's given the world.
Immortalizing its wonderful humanist philosophers.
But it doesn't have any.
So, instead, it's fetishizing the bloodiest war in human history it's won. What else are you to do when your technology is an elderly woman with a sledge hammer, when your movies are shit, your literature is boring and depressing, no sane person ever watches ballet, and your philosophy boils down to Dying For Motherland?
You celebrate death. Forever.
Apr 27 5 tweets 1 min read
A good and complex question. In 1990, even though there weren't any threats or aggression toward Russian speakers, there were good reasons to fear. Ethnic conflicts in many parts of the USSR had turned bloody. Ethnic Russians were called occupiers and colonizers...
1/? Many Moldovans were adamant to institute Romanian as the only official language. Some rather bizarre racist laws were proposed (for instance, to change all Jews' names to be clearly and unmistakeably Jewish). All and all, this was pretty standard anti-colonial backlash...
Apr 26 13 tweets 3 min read
Transnistria, where I was born and raised, has been under Russian occupation since (and this is not a typo) 1992. The root of the conflict is the fact that the region, the eastern bank of the Dniester River and my native city of Bender, is mostly populated with Russian speakers🧵 The left bank of the Dniester was formerly a part of Ukraine, known as the Moldavian Autonomous SSR. It had some Romanian speakers, but the majority were ethnic Russians and Ukrainians, primarily concentrated in the city of Tiraspol.
After the war, Stalin reannexed Moldova...
Apr 26 25 tweets 8 min read
Here comes another long-ass Slava Russia/Ukraine-explainer thread. In this one, I would like to draw a contrast between the invader and Ukraine from an unusual yet pertinent point of view: the humor culture and the usage of humor in politics.
Believe it or not, it explains A LOT. You may have heard that Zelensky is a professional comedian. The original source of his fame is the Russian TV show called KVN. I have a thorough explanation of KVN and Zelensky's role in it in this old blog post (from 2019). Below is the TL;DR version.…
Apr 25 4 tweets 2 min read
Watching #Navalny on CNN. It's nothing new to those who have followed his story, but it's great that the film features the brilliant work of @christogrozev, who is nothing less than a XXI-century, real-life Sherlock Holmes. "It's elementary"
Really, Christo's explanations of how he solved Navalny's poisoning and unmasked his killers without ever leaving his house beats anything Sir Arthur Conan Doyle ever wrote.
Absolutely magnificent. Don't EVER get in this man's corsshairs.
Apr 19 11 tweets 4 min read
More from everyday, regular Russians.
"The longer this goes on, the more certain I am that we need to cleanse Ukraine entirely, completely, it's the absolute rock bottom", says this young lady... "Selling (racial slur for Ukrainian women), cheap. They stink and are dirty, but that goes without saying, just wash them in kerosene, and they will be like Russian girls. But they quack in (racial slur for Ukrainian language), but it's not a problem, just read their tongue out"
Apr 19 6 tweets 2 min read
Father of a Moskva sailor
1) posts zwastikas, "fight for Motherland"
2) son is "MIA", gov't won't say anything, how dishonest and terrible
3) Ukrainians show up and tell him what they think of his son
4) "People who call themselves Ukrainians are not human, all you have is hate" They honestly, seriously don't get it.
They don't understand why Ukrainians are fighting back. They don't understand why they are not happy to see those who have come to liberate them from Nazism. They don't understand why they just don't give up to the glorious might of Putin.
Apr 17 4 tweets 1 min read
Watching a match in New York. A bunch of Oyrishmen are here to take on the Noo Yawkahs in a game of Gaelic Fitba.
The score so far is 0-4 to 0-3 for the hosts. Image And the hosts are down, 0-6 to 1-5. Rotten luck, lads.
Apr 15 4 tweets 1 min read
From Russia's Channel 1:
"Everyone must realize that what's ahead is a mobilization and a global war against all our enemies. Our national ideology is war. And the only job for us, and for our authority, is to explain to all of Russia's people this heroic image of our future." For 20 years, Russians have been inundated with war propaganda. With a necrophilic cult of World War II. They dressed up toddler as heroic wounded soldiers. They were taught that the war was the climax of Russia's and the world's history. They were conditioned to want it again.
Apr 14 4 tweets 2 min read
A short little thread explaining the nature of the operation performed by the Moskva.
The Russian phrase "Idi na khuy" (ee-DEE NA-hooy), generally translated into English as "go fuck yourself", literally means "go on or to a dick" and contains a multitude of intended meanings... Image Like almost all Russian profanities, it is carnal in nature, which of course is obvious. The more or less literal original meaning is something akin to "go impale yourself on a dick" or "go sit on a dick", which makes it more akin to "get fucked."
In short, this is an extreme...
Apr 13 5 tweets 1 min read
Stop hoping that Russians will wake up and rise against Putin.
Won't happen. Some are scared, some beaten down, most ambivalent, many fanatically loyal. The rest are easily subdued.
Stop hoping that Russians will be ashamed by what's happening. Those who aren't now, never will be This isn't Germany. There won't be any shame. Russians will maintain delusions and alternate reality forever. They will construct ever more elaborate explanations. They will submerge themselves into ever more insane conspiracy theories.
But mostly, they will play victim.
Apr 13 5 tweets 2 min read
My friend's sisters live in #Bucha. They got to Kyiv shortly before the Russians came, and just now managed to get back to look at the house. They only maganed to steal a quick look, because the place hasn't been swept for mines yet.
The report is not surprising... The place is trashed, all the food is gone. The heavy household equipment (TV, fridge, stove) wasn't taken, since the "guests" were probably infantry and couldn't take anything too cumbersome. However, the washer's door has been "denazified" (ripped off)...