I've been feeling real low and having a lot of problems coping and I know it's the snow but it's hard to remember that external things affect me really hard sometimes. I have to keep reminding myself to be gentle with myself.

I feel like I already do so little right now that when I can do less, it's absolutely devastating for me.

I wish I knew wtf was wrong with me.

Sometimes I'm really aware of how little energy I've had for the last few years.

I always feel like I'll just crumple if I have to do one. extra. thing and there are SO MANY THINGS. I feel like I've been deficient in energy for so long.

And every so often I'll have a little extra and remember that if everything is dirty you just have to wash a damn knife sometimes and it's suddenly not a big deal at all and I laugh at myself for not being able to something

Every activity for 1 year olds that the internet suggests is super messy and omg I rarely have the spoons to purposely make something I have to clean up after. Now I'm all worried that I'm a bad mom for not making her get messy? Ahhh, parenting is a fucking ride.

Do people who think showing a fat model is promoting obesity also think that showing a disabled model is promoting disability? And since Tess Holliday is very outspoken about working out, maybe the idea that people are worried about showing "unhealthy" people as role models is really just thinly veiled bigotry and ableism.

Neither my mom nor my dad (both date men) ever got remarried or had relationships lasting more than a year after they got divorced.

My nana has been single for over 10 years after 3 failed marriages and my grandma has been living her fucking life now that my grandpa is dead. After an 11 year marriage that I'm not at all sure is salvageable, a year long partnership where I was emotionally and financially abused, and casual sex with half of my fucking town, I'm almost positive I'm going to be single for the rest of my life.

I feel like bone juice Read: I feel like raw sewage

My baber's sleeping in her own room tonight. 😭😭😭 O_O I have my own room again. It looks so big without the crib and her dresser.

Uuuuugh, I'm so tired of all this shit with my ex.

They haven't said anything to me out loud in like two weeks, refuse to communicate about when they'll be in the house, and are actively fucking up my husband with their abusive as shit silent treatment bullshit. Jfc, they're old enough to be an adult about a damn break up.

Y'all. I just turned down a dude SO HARD We set up plans to meet a bit after 2 today when I was done getting my quarterly STI test.

So 2 rolls around and I get a text from him saying he'll be ready at 3:30.

I still have to get blood drawn and work in a trip to the store so I'm like, Okay.

I need strength. It's been a week since I broke up with my ex and they are coming home this morning.

My most current ex inadvertently did me a solid. I was trying to get out on my own&on my own time but I was real anxious.

But then I was leaving the house bc I didn't want to talk to them and now I'm going out bc I like being free to do whatever tf I want whenever tf I want. I didn't really realize that it wasn't so much that I didn't have the energy or desire to go out.

It was that the lead up to and experience of going out with them took up an impossible amount of spoons for me.

When people present shit like the Austin bomber being from a close-knit community that checks on each other, all I hear is that they saw who he was and it wasn't bad enough (read directed at white people enough) for anyone to betray whiteness by correcting him or telling someone. All these white bombers and mass shooters are supposedly from close knit communities so maybe we really need to reevaluate what our reactions are to behavioral red flags.