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Sen. Lemon Gogurt ugarles.bsky.social Profile picture
Sen. Lemon Gogurt ugarles.bsky.social
@Ugarles
Lawguy @ALABSeries and @HostilePodcast (law + City Saint/Country Saint, a football pod) RIP Mic Dicta Writing/Pods UgArchive: https://t.co/0LotvmJ0jJ he/him
Jul 18 • 5 tweets • 1 min read
One-woman IT department goes to help a paralegal with a software issue and his desktop wallpaper was a spread-eagle beaver shot. she didn't *care* and didn't report him to the partners but also told him that he had to change it because he was in a workplace for grownups
Jun 9, 2023 • 9 tweets • 4 min read
my god it's real Image this section about what he said before being the president seems gratuitous but it is very funny to include Image
Oct 12, 2022 • 5 tweets • 2 min read
the last day of deliberations have been about whether to give the families "a billion dollars" or "a billion dollars and 36 cents" and 11 cents?
Sep 29, 2022 • 4 tweets • 2 min read
it's silly but forever ago i was on a group politics blog called "Rick's Cafe Americain" and my pseudonym was Ugarte (the Peter Lorre character). on my friend @FakeDawnSummers' blog, she called me Charles/Ugarte, which evolved to Chugarte which evolved to Ugarles. i am happy to have that blog wiped from the internet! nothing egregious, probably pretty lib given the time and the choices in, say, the 2000 election. never want to see my thoughts from 20+ years ago in print.
Sep 27, 2022 • 8 tweets • 3 min read
His entire job was Not Losing At the 11th Circuit in the fight over using the classified documents in the criminal investigation. The rest of the dispute with the Archives is a real insight into Trump's character but otherwise pales in comparison. Trump has to be mad that someone finally got him to pay up front then underdelivered. That's his move!
Aug 15, 2022 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
dr. oz making a shocked face at the price of salsa this is the worst it has ever been in the state of pencilania.
Aug 14, 2022 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
kind of rt'ing too much today so sorry but i am fucking crying at this even the expression on the face looks le reddit
Aug 14, 2022 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
stupid game. on January 20th Biden could have said "everything Trump declassified in the last 12 months reverts to it's prior classification level" and Trump is bound by it. if Trump has the secret declassification power, Biden has the secret reclassification power. the easiest neutrality-burnishing thing SCOTUS could do is grind their heels into trump's neck on this. lifetime appointees don't really have any reason to protect him once he's no longer in office if they think he is damaging to their long-term goals.
Aug 12, 2022 • 4 tweets • 2 min read
starting a thread of usernames that make me laugh out loud whenever i see them so they're all in one place. First, @LeHarrumph Image next, @TurdGuy, though he has since changed it a couple of times Image
Jul 5, 2022 • 5 tweets • 1 min read
i'm sure it's happening in the shadows but we really do need some doctors or hospitals to say out loud that they are willing to provide appropriate medical care to pregnant women and risk the ire of their ghoulish state governments Dobbs is going to have it's most devastating short-term effects in medical practice governed by legal caution about how the most vindictive shits will enforce their draconian statutes.
Jul 5, 2022 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
respect to the FOP's willingness to lie about ANYTHING cop's hat has a bullet pocket for when you need an emergency bullet
Nov 11, 2021 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
the rittenhouse trial is showing is that the left has to get used to the fact that they are going to get hunted. the psychos will show up and yell the n-word and shoot the first guy who takes a swing at them like hunters dumping corn on the ground and hiding in a deer stand. based on what i've seen from the charlottesville trial (thanks @socialistdogmom) this is an explicit strategy! they talk in their chatrooms about baiting the left into attacking them so that they can respond with ultraviolence. the police are basically supportive of this!
Sep 28, 2021 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
current hold music is Coldplay's The Scientist being played through a jet engine. estimated wait time is 16 minutes. nobody said it was easy
Sep 9, 2021 • 5 tweets • 1 min read
decided i dislike the pejorative sense of "thirst trap". if a mutual posts a pic where she thinks she looks good i shouldn't have to be in my own head about feeling like an adulterer leaving a paper trail because i clicked a li'l heart to give a thumbs up. starting a substack. *DM's mutual that prompted tweet and am immediately arrested*
Sep 2, 2021 • 13 tweets • 2 min read
All republican lawmaking and judical philosophy is exploiting cheat codes. this is what i mean by cheat codes, if you'll induldge a dumb thread
May 14, 2021 • 5 tweets • 1 min read
what is the M word that ben garrison wants to say? hmm.

hmmmmmmmmmm ben got too excited and forgot to draw safe space mountain
May 13, 2021 • 4 tweets • 2 min read
we're going to have to go back to paper records if cybersecurity depends on bored mens' ability to resist clicking on pictures of hot babes I amgoing to confess that I chalked this up to "too good to check" but I have to check now
Apr 27, 2021 • 5 tweets • 2 min read
the no-fly list is bad is because it is opaque and applied in a discriminatory fashion. if nick fuentes is on the no-fly list because of his admitted fight with flight staff over wearing a mask, that's literally and uncontroversially how the no-fly list is supposed to work. "this person can't fly because he chose to violate airline safety rules and fight about it"
Apr 20, 2021 • 5 tweets • 1 min read
as a lawyer, this could mean a conviction or an acquittal. more as this breaking story unfolds. this has to be as close to a real version of my tweet that you will see online
Apr 18, 2021 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
soccer in the US isn't socialist, it is a single-entity system structured to avoid antitrust scrutiny where teams are only as independent from each other as the league wants them to be as a way of controlling player compensation. it's like calling Amazon socialism because they own powells and alibris but you can still buy books at both places
Apr 16, 2021 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
"seen here, receiving the news" he should be able to demand second shots of both